i like livio and i wish people talked about livio more so heres a yap fest about things that I think couldve been expanded on with his character if he had enough time☝️
(quick note this is meant to be about trimax BUT I do refer to ww as livios brother, however in this specific sense it doesn't really matter if they are adoptive brothers or close friends okay cool love and peace)
Okay so n1 is loneliness and how the effects of having a isolated/neglectful childhood(in comparison to his entire childhood his time in the orphanage would not make up for the abuse and isolation he went through before and after) and how that would affect his feelings towards vash n the gang☝️ Because holy shit imagine you go spending your ALMOST entire life in some form of isolation, rather crippling abuse and neglect, or straight up homelessness, and then out of nowhere on a random fucking tuesday some freakazoid decided that you were his friend. and treated you with nothing but kindness and acceptance. TRUSTED YOU and showed you to his friends, AND THEN THEY LEARNED TO TRUST YOU???? Like the whiplash would be insane good god. And Livio at heart is very gentle, kind and self sacrificing person overwhelmed with guilt for what happened with his brother, to the point he believe he needs to be punished and doesn't deserve to be trusted. He believes he has to prove his worth as a friend by constantly throwing his life around like a dog toy, because after all he's only there because Nico threw away his
sorry im a lazy bum and taking discord ss cuz I don't wanna retype allat
BUT OKAY N2☝️☝️☝️ ENVY!!!!! BITTERNESS!!!! GUILTY FOR BEING LOVED THE PREQUEL!!!!!!! This is one of my favorites to think about because it doesn't really have a solid back bone argument other than "Well I bet he did so I'm gonna say he did", and thats fun imo!!! While Livio's actual heart is straight gold, that does not completely remove the majority of his life spent suffering, and no matter how kind one is, enough abuse will make you bitter(which is obviously one of triguns many themes) And obviously yea we can see that through his actions while with the EoM, I believe that bitterness was just as persistent as a kid, but much more internalized. We know he was atleast a little bit like this at the beginning, where when Wolfwood tries to talk to him he lashes out and says things such as "You don't understand blah blah blah", despite the fact that he is surrounded by kids who probably would understand. This isn't just self pity, its bitterness. He was alone for so long, with an unexplainable pain in his heart from abuse he wasn't even fully aware of. And ontop of that, and this kind of ties into the previous point, but there's a kind of whiplash and pain that comes with going from a positive to a negative. And in this case, he was still a negative being exposed to a place full of positivity. Of course he'd be bitter, of course hed think they didn't understand, he himself again didn't even fully understand. What is this continuous stream of love and acceptance and safety??? What do you do with this after never being shown it??? But that's just envy and bitterness in a general sense, here's it about Wolfwood
This part especially is a very shakey, potential maybe could be right thought, and is more based on the unwanted thoughts side of trauma. Wolfwood was so young and was tasked with taking care of even younger kids, Livio being one of them. With trauma like Livio's, being shown love and kindness feels even more painful than the abuse, because it starts so early that you learn to adapt and cope(such as developing DID), BUT while his pain and awareness was dulled, the side effects of trauma do not go away. I honestly don't think current time Livio feels so guilty just for what happened to Wolfwood, but rather that guilt for being loved has persisted his entire life, and actually started with Wolfwood himself, and being unable to process the love he was being shown.
BUT☝️ THATS JUST THE GUILT☝️ The envy is something I picked up more from EoM Livio and just how overall it seemed Livio had it "worse" (I don't like comparing trauma but yk wtvr). Harsher expieriments and modifications, was often treated like a feral gaurd dog, restrained to nothing but following orders and proving his undivided loyalty, which is a contrast to Wolfwoods rebelliousness and 'freedom'(though in reality they were both doomed to a cage). Now what do you think Livio thought and felt about that. How do you think he felt seeing how beloved and praised Wolfwood was as child, how Wolfwood was needed, how he so easily belonged. You telling me he wouldn't be a little bitter??? Envious??? And envy is a sibling of greed the way it continues to feed and take, and even after Livio earned his own praise for saving the puppy(WHICH I HAVE SOOO MUCH TO SAY ABOUT THAT BUT THATS FOR ANOTHER DAY), the envy towards Wolfwood still didn't die. Because Wolfwood would always be better, be more needed. Livio could just disappear without a trace, and nothing would change. And he does do that, and he ends up in a place where HE is better, where HE is needed. And again, it's still not enough, because Wolfwood got the privilege of freedom, of not needing to be needed.
anyways midvio from trimid midimum idk if this sounds good I'll post more and maybe talk about mr razzle dazzle
