#arthurpendragon

via Bradley James IG - Finally reached my Billy Idol era

word count: 1782

As the sun hung low in an orange sky, Merlin was balancing a bathing towel, soap, and some bathing oils up the stairs to Arthur’s chambers. Humming to himself, he entered the room, only to stop short at the sight that presented itself to him.

“Merlin. You are late. The only thing I can depend on when it comes to you.”, was the flat comment he was greeted with. 

Arthur was already fully immersed in a bath tub, rubbing his arms with a cloth.

“You are bathing.”, the servant commented.

“Your observational skills are unparalleled.”, the prince rolled his eyes, still attending to washing his upper arm.

“Who did that?”, Merlin asked.

“Who did what?”

“Put you in there?”

This made Arthur finally look up with an exasperated expression. “I am very capable of entering a bath tub by myself, Merlin.”

“No, I mean… who prepared the bath?”, Merlin asked, slowly placing the bathing utensils on a cupboard next to him.

“I did. It is not an overly difficult task. After all, you can do it.”, Arthur said.

That made Merlin cross his arms in front of his chest and look at Arthur with raised eyebrows. “You are telling me. You dragged the bath tub in here.”

“Yup.”

“And then you went into the kitchens, warmed up water, and carried the buckets up until the bath was full?”

“Well...”, Arthur pouted his lips noncommittally, “I might have had the one or other kitchen maid help me with that particular part of the task.”

“Why didn’t you just wait for me? I told you I would prepare your bath.”

Arthur let his head fall back on to the rim of the tub. “I told you Merlin, you were late, as always! And I did not want to wait for you!”

“Hm. That never led to you doing things yourself before.”, the servant persisted. He had the weird feeling Arthur was keeping something from him. 

“Can people not change?”, Arthur asked the ceiling, head still leaned back.

“Not you,”, Merlin commented, unimpressed. He stepped closer and inspected the bath water. A strong florally scent stung his nose as his eyes travelled over the very soapy water. “I see we got a little overexcited there with the bathing oils. The water is white.”, he grinned.

Arthur’s head came back up. “For your information. This is exactly how I want my bath water to be.”

“Alright, alright! Shutting up!”, Merlin retreated with upheld hands. “What kinds of clothes do you want me to lay out for you?”

“I am blessed with a late night counsel meeting, so comfortable, but presentable.”, Arthur responded.

Merlin turned to Arthur’s closet and rummaged through the prince’s clothes. Every now and then he glanced over to the prince, who seemed preoccupied with scrubbing himself and washing his hair. In the past, Merlin had assisted with this, but Arthur didn’t call him for it this time. The feeling that something was off intensified.

When the time came for Arthur to exit the bath, Merlin naturally went over to fetch the towel and hold it up for him. Arthur looked at Merlin like a deer in headlights.

“Oh… uh… I can take care of that, Merlin.”, he stammered.

Merlin let the towel sink. “What do you mean?”

“I’m… not quite done yet. And when I am, I will come out and fetch the towel myself.”, Arthur explained.

“Since when?”

Arthur raised an eyebrow. “It is not in your job description to question your superior. Now, go and bring me… my… ceremonial boots.”

Merlin cocked his head to the side. “Your ceremonial boots? For the council meeting?”

“Yes”, Arthur responded, “They are very… comfortable. And I want to wear them.” “You never wear those. I don’t even know where they are.”

“Well, then, you better start digging them out.”, Arthur snarled.

Merlin scoffed, shook his head, and left for the closet again. “You are weird today.”, he muttered.

“Yes, well, you are weird everyday.”, was the prince’s response. 

It took Merlin about 10 minutes of digging and throwing clothes and boots out of the closet, but finally he found the ceremonial boots very unceremoniously trapped under some dirty hunting boots. He pulled them out with a groan, and blew some of the dust and dirt off them, before turning to show them to Arthur. 

Just when he approached the bath tub, he saw that Arthur had exited the tub, and was just about to wrap the towel around his waist. When he saw Merlin coming, he startled and nearly dropped the towel. “By Camelot, Merlin! Don’t give me such a fright!”, he exclaimed.

Merlin looked confused. “You knew I was back there. Who else would it be?”

“No, I know. I just thought I had more time before you… it doesn’t matter. You got the boots?”, he asked quickly, fastening the towel clumsily, about to turn hurriedly away.

Merlin’s eyes wandered over the prince’s upper body, how his wet skin glistened in the candle light, how being in the cold after the warm bath hardened his nipples, how a delicate narrow road of hair guided itself below the belly button, and further down. Then, his eyes settled on a noticeable bulge in the towel. Merlin’s insides moved in a weird way, and his lips parted, as realisation struck.

“Y-Yeah.”, he only said, holding up the boots in question.

“Good!”, Arthur said, in a weird artificial cheery voice. Then he quickly turned and vanished behind the room divider. 

Merlin slowly put the boots down, head weirdly full and empty at the same time, before picking up the clothes he had laid out for Arthur and coming around the divider. “Where do you want me to-?”, he started, but was interrupted by a jumping Arthur.

“Merlin!”, he yelled, whirling around and clutching his towel. “Stop sneaking up on me like that!”

“I’m following protocol.”, Merlin slowly said. “That’s what I always do.”

“And now I say we do it differently. Leave the clothes there, I take care of it.”, Arthur commanded.

“What is up with you today?”, Merlin exclaimed, done with Arthur’s antics.

“How many times to I have to tell you? Nothing! No leave me.”

Merlin pointed to Arthur’s groin area. “Is it because you have a hard-on?”

“W-What?”

“Your penis. Is hard.”, Merlin stated.

“No, it’s not.”

“Yeah, it is.”

“Merlin!”

“It clearly is!”, Merlin insisted, looking unashamedly at it. “It’s fine, you don’t have to be ashamed or something-“

“How dare you? My penis is none of your business!”, Arthur shouted, trying clumsily to hold his towel in a way that his hands would cover his manhood’s mood.

Merlin sighed. “I have a penis myself, in case you weren't aware, I know how it looks like when-“

“Can we stop talking about my penis?”, Arthur shrieked. “Get out. Now!”

Merlin just frowned in confusion and bewilderment. He had seen Arthur naked countless times over the years, and it had never been a problem. Granted, he had never seen little Arthur raise its head, but it was a normal, natural thing. Not something to make a fuss over. 

“Whatever.”, he muttered, done with this situation. He dropped the clothes, turned, and left Arthur alone behind the room divider.

As he gathered up the bathing towels and oils, his mind was racing. What on earth was going on here? Arthur was rather uptight in general, yes, but not like this. So his penis had decided to wake up at an unfortunate moment, what was the big deal? Penises did that several times a day, often without any conscious reason. So why make a big deal out of it? Unless…

Merlin swallowed, halting mid movement. A suspicion settled in his stomach. Why Arthur had poured the bath water himself, why he had made the bath water milky white so it was non-transparent, why he didn’t call Merlin for assisting him in washing his hair, why he sent Merlin away before coming out of the bath tub. What if it was more than Arthur’s penis doing its own thing? What if it had risen… for a reason? What if it was the same reason that Merlin felt his heart flutter whenever he saw Arthur’s uneven teeth whenever he broke out in an earnest smile? When he saw Arthur’s shoulder muscles move when he sorted out his chainmail topless in the morning? When he felt Arthur’s warm grip on his arm? And let’s not even talk about Merlin’s own penis when he lay awake at night, recalling those very scenes.

But why now? What did set this off?

“I thought I told you to leave.”, Arthur scolded, and ripped Merlin out of his brooding.

He watched Arthur walk towards the door, fully dressed now. His gait weird due to the barely worn boots. Merlin doubted they were very comfortable.

It was just a suspicion. And yet, Merlin couldn’t shake the certainty attached to it. “Consider me gone, sire.”, Merlin mumbled, taking up the bathing utensils.

Arthur had arrived at the door, turning around one last time. “Good. And don’t ever mention… my… this again. Understood?”

Merlin had tried desperately to keep his eyes focused on his eyes, but this comment made his eyes fly down to Arthur’s groin automatically. Little Arthur seemed to have decided to go back to sleep.

“Merlin!”, Arthur said, alarmed, “What did I just say?”

“I’m sorry! It's like saying “Don’t look at something”. It makes you look at it!”, Merlin said exasperated. “And if you wouldn’t make it such a big deal, it wouldn’t be.”

“I’m not making it a big deal.”

“Yeah, you do. You poured yourself a whole bath because of it. Why?”

“Huh?”

“Why are you making it a big deal?”

“I’m…not. Just…”, Arthur stammered, looking around the room, as if he was hoping to find the answer in one of its corners. “It has been… reacting weirdly lately. That’s all.”

“How so?”, Merlin cocked his head.

Arthur glanced down now himself, as if looking upon a misbehaving child. “Well, he is… whenever you… ”, he started, looking up at Merlin. Then, as if he just realised what he was doing, he shook his head vehemently. “This conversation is over.”, he finished harshly, turned, and left his chambers.

are you man enough, arthur, to win a battle with a sword in your hand and your knights at your back?

merlin wins them with empty hands, with magic he cannot speak of, with a target painted on his very existence.

are you man enough to be called a hero?

merlin saves you and swallows the name whole, lets it burn down his throat, lets history carve your face into stone while he fades into something softer, something forgettable.

are you man enough to be loved?

merlin loves you in silence. in secrecy. in the spaces between your victories, in the moments where you never even realize you almost died.

he drags you back from fate, again and again and again.

and you thank destiny. you thank luck. you thank anyone but him.

so tell me, arthur: are you man enough to live a life that was never yours alone?

Like WHY weren't they allowed to make out or cuddle or f**k nasty on that show?! And I'm just never gonna get to see that?! Insane.