thinking about how by the end kim and chay are the only people who really know who the other person is. like it's kinda clear that by the end of the series, porsche knows nothing about chay's life anymore. he doesnt know about the p'wik or the guitar tutoring or the club escapade or giving up on university or the loneliness. nobody knows these things about chay except for kim. and on kim's end... well nobody fucking knows anything about kim and that's the way he's designed it. nobody knows anything about kim except for chay. because kim tutored chay for who knows how long. because they were close enough that chay was leaving polaroids in kim's apartment for kim to find. because they were close enough that kim went to chay's house. nobody knows anything about chay except for kim. kim's the only one who knows that chay likes to wear his guitar using only one starp because he thinks it adds some kind of rockstar chic to him. he's the only one who knows that chay has to write out his lyrics using pencil and paper. he's the only one who understands chay's love for music. he's the only one who knows how lonely chay is since porsche left. and on the other hand chay is the only person to know kim. he's the only one who knows that kim like his steak practically raw and will defend his choice like there's no tomorrow. he's the only one who knows that when p'kim really smiles, you can see his gums. and he's the only one who knows that while p'wik may be the persona p'kim likes the most, it'll never be who p'kim truly is. and he's the only one who knows that p'kim always twirls his pen twice before writing anything down. and he's the only person who knows what p'kim looks like half asleep. and by the end, these two characters who are practically isolated in the final episode, only they know who the other person is. only kim knows who chay is, who chay has become through the involvement of the mafia in his life and through kim's own actions. only chay knows who kim really is, cruel and kind in mostly equal measures. they're not even on speaking terms by the end and still, only they know who each other are. their hearts live outside their chests and they just have to keep on going like everything is normal. doesn't this make you insane?????
