#armouredrose

it was entirely his own fault. if he had become a septon, perhaps packed his clothes away and gone off to live a life of colourless boredom, he wouldn’t be here now, blue eyes constantly flitting to loras every few moments - even from across the great hall. just then, he couldn’t think of a single good reason why they had left their chambers. renly could hear the telltale buzz of giggling and flirting, the way everyone’s heads immediately turned towards the knight of flowers when he entered a room - and how could he blame them? the stormlord smiled at the youngest tyrell son every chance he got: not the soft, intensely proud smile he had donned of late; not even the carefree smile he saved for their most comfortable moments. this one was a smirk of full intent, syrupy and sweet.

he had been talking to one of the selmy daughters, a sweet girl who had talked in circles about the knight of flowers. so naturally, renly had grinned his widest and asked her if she might want to be introduced to him. ( he couldn’t ask loras to dance and he couldn’t sit next to him - no, cersei would make sure of that before anything else. so he took his opportunities where he could get them. ) “ ah, ser loras! ” the stag greeted as if he hadn’t seen the knight mere hours ago and wouldn’t be kissing him senseless mere hours later. there was a wickedly fond smile on his face, and renly winked just because he could. and before anyone but loras could see him do it. “ have you met lord arstan’s daughter? she and i seem to be your biggest fans. ”

in a fit of annoyance - because once one person had started blaming him for supporting stannis, everyone found a reason to blame him for something - renly had stormed towards the outskirts of the camp. he was tired - tired from rolling his eyes all morning and nursing a painful headache that even milk of the poppy couldn’t subdue. and he hadn’t seen loras in longer than he liked, which always put him in a foul mood and made him just a touch more sarcastic than usual. so the lord of storm’s end ( for however long that title would last ) had gone out looking for the knight of flowers, walking around in circles until he finally bit down his pride and asked where the man could be found. all three of his guards had piped up  - directing him to a clearing up ahead. and so he had dismissed them and sent them on his way, but when renly heard the sound of laughter ringing from up ahead, he almost thought he had ventured the wrong way.

it was suddenly apparent why he couldn’t find loras, because loras was busy running around with a small ring of children, playing at knights and looking so much more carefree than he had looked in an age. if he didn’t blink too fast, renly could almost imagine they were back in the courtyard in storm’s end. standing just out of eyeshot, leaning against a tree with his arms crossed against his chest, he couldn’t stop a smile from stretching wide across his face until his cheeks hurt and his eyes were bright with affection. it was then that one of the children noticed him, a little boy coming his way. “ i’m sorry ser, i was just looking for the knight of flowers, ” renly started laughingly, pausing only to level loras with a fond look, his gaze soft around the edges. “ but i see you’re busy defeating him. ”

stannis could have everything of his, everything. the stormlands. storm’s end. his titles, his clothes, his horses, his men, his time. his support even when he didn’t believe in stannis anymore. the baratheon legacy. renly would give it all up without a single moment’s hesitation, but he wouldn’t give loras up. he had seen marriages fail time and time again, ending in misery and mutual loathing and a shameful sense of distance. but that wasn’t their story: they had grown and evolved and loved more and more and more. there was a wedding cloak at the bottom of his trunk that proved they were the exception. and the last thing he could do was say his goodbyes, knowing there was a chance they wouldn’t meet again. but it was inevitable that he would have to go. 

seeking loras out in his chambers, renly collapsed into a seat down next to him; one hand reaching out to lace their fingers together, the other going up to brush through errant golden curls. he knew the knight of flowers was still mourning his father’s loss, still reeling from his father’s murder, and he wanted to stay with him until the very last moment. until he truly, really had to leave. but leaving was inevitable. “ you know, before you first came to storm’s end, ” renly began quietly, a smile evident in just his voice, “ i complained like hell about you. ” he’d argued with ser cortnay about not wanting a bloody squire until he was blue in the face for a moon. “ i was a fucking idiot. ” he laughed, the silly sort of laugh he only ever did in front of loras. “ and then you were knighted, and i thought well, he’s done with me. ” 

renly drew a sharp breath, sobering up. could he justify riding to stannis, after his brother had burned his wife for all of highgarden to see? no, and he wouldn’t blame loras for being upset with him, especially not this time. steeling himself, he hazarded a glance at the other. “ i’ll be back soon, i promise. ”