#apolloinaire

Je veux vivre inhumain, puissant et orgueilleux Puisque je fus créé à l'image de Dieu.

Lawrence isn’t… always… great at things. 

Well, no, he’s great at everything. That’s not the problem. His current issue is that everyone else is awful at everything. Adding too many little interactions and expressions and, and-

“Gahhhh,” Lawrence grumbles, but it builds into a loud groan as he falls back against his couch. His hands flex uselessly, trying to control the way the universe flows around him, pull it into a manageable shape, but Adam’s small, concerned noise has everything melting again. Wrong wrong wrong.

The flex turns into agitated flaps, turn into light smacks of Lawrence’s ruffled hair, and Adam’s concerned grunts turn into, “Hey, Lawrence, are you okay?”

“No, I’m not, thu-thanks for asking.” God, Lawrence hates when his words start stumbling. He rakes his hands through his hair. Just calm down. Just blank it out. Push it away. He squeezes his eyes shut and tries to focus on the sting when his fingers curl and pull, but that’s too much for an allistic Adam.

There’s a hand on his, trying to guide it away from his hair, “Whoa, you’re gonna hurt yourself,” and Lawrence, embarrassingly, jerks away and flails his hand out at Adam before chewing on it. Well, there goes any semblance of being normal. People are going to think something’s wrong with you…

He’s not upset. He’s frustrated. He doesn’t know how to talk, or what to say- Adam is good and wonderful, he really is, but it’s so hard to try to act right. There’s a reason Lawrence works in a tiny office, alone, separate. People are hard, especially people he likes.

Especially when you try to be like everyone else, act like you aren’t affected by too much, and pretend you feel things you don’t around someone you like.

Adam seems to understand that he needs to stop touching, stays instead of continuing to leave when Lawrence makes a wounded noise. He stays close, picks up the controller, and the game noises returning lets Lawrence focus on something that isn’t the chaos in his skull.

Eventually, he comes uncurled, dries his hand on his shirt. Adam doesn’t give him a disgusted look, just gently reaches out and rubs his thigh when Lawrence doesn’t flinch. “Hey. I’m sorry. I just didn’t want you to pull your hair out, but. You know your limits. If it helps you, I shouldn’t stop you.”

It’s not what Lawrence expected, and he, cool as a cucumber, smooth as ice, blurts out, “Can I kiss you?”

I mean...........

i mean........

who says that lars doesn’t have a thing for his counterpart too. 

thanks apollo!!

rose: which of your works is your favorite? why?  I’ve got a real soft spot for With a Zed, tbh. It just. Started out as something so small, a prompt generated from a website and it turned into it’s own little world building exercise. Also, this untitled ask fic I wrote because I love writing cathartic pieces so much. 

sunflower: what is the best feedback/compliment you’ve ever received regarding your writing?

a few examples!

violet: do you read a lot?

fic, yes! books, no ): I need to read more book tho ;;

poppy: do you write your fics right here on your tumblr drafts? if not, where?

for ask fic i write them in the ask, I have a chrome extension that saves pieces of text i write so if it closes, it’s easily recovered. for regular fic, i write them in word or on WPS on my phone, and if im at work on a register, i write fic on either the notepad i have in my apron or on several pieces of receipt paper!!

buttercup: do you prefer to write requests or come up with your own things?

I hold no preference for either, tbh. I’ll write both, but recently I’ve been coming up with my own ideas after like, over a year of not being able to ;=;

lotus: how many drafts do you currently have?

lily: i ABSOLUTELY listen to music, but i dont really have a set playlist- i either listen to all of my music, mouth moods, or loop poisonous gas, wonderland round three, or storm top dog

violet: i used to read a lot more than i do now, but i still read a fair bit of fanfic and ive been meaning to reread the talisman

#RECEIPTS