#aoughhh

thinkin tonight about how the Curtis' have always fed the strays in their neighborhood. How nightly Darry, Soda, n Pony would gather on the steps with leftovers n water. How Soda n Pony would come up with stories for them. Would run small hands over matted fur, coax, n murmur assurance. How that tradition continued even after their parents died. How Darry became busier n busier. How he never had time to sit on porch steps n care for strays. But Soda n Pony do. N one night durin the week his brother is missin n Soda is too distraught to do anythin but flit around the house anxious, hoverin, sobbin. Darry goes out to the steps n none of those strays remember him. scatter from the yard quick as legs can carry them. n he can't do anythin but sit down on those rotted steps n cry.

Pangi said Pili was the only person who gave him validation and it just reminded me of how when Pili told him "Pangi I care about you" how gobsmacked Pangi got and later said that he doesn't get compliments like these usually

hitting a phase of "wow my writing is shit" and aughh