#any!joel

Jesus, you sound ridiculous but gods honest truth, that’s what it’s like when you’re around Joel Miller. “You sound jealous.” He says without looking at you, his attention back to his book.

“I am not jealous-“ the words sounding bitter, “-I’m annoyed! They do all that shit in front of me and you eat it all up, it fuckin sucks. You don’t get how it feels.”

You didn’t know what you and Joel were. You weren’t public but even behind closed doors, neither of you put a title or meaning to whatever this was. “Ah don’t worry about it, sweetheart, I don’t notice so why should it bother you.” It was then, the way he dismissed your worries and feelings, focused too much on his damn book to even look at you, you realised, he just didn’t care.. You stand still above him just watching him, knots in your stomach tightening, yet, he doesnt look up, or notice that now you’re picking up your shit, youre getting yourself dressed and leaving.

Maybe he would be better off with a younger woman, someone who’s in their own head to notice what a dick Joel can be sometimes. You had enough. You got yourself home, put your comfy pjs on and climbed into bed.

Surprisingly, you fell straight to sleep, been a while since it’s been that easy. That was until there was a knock at your door. You knew who it was, so you took your sweet ass time, putting socks on as the floor was freezing, the knocks become louder, more panicked. You slowly walked down the stairs, again, taking your sweet ass time. As you approached the door, seeing the big dark figure through the thick netted curtains, you smirk and ask, “who is it.” Knowing you’ll hear a grunt or a “fuck sake.”

“For fuck sake, it’s me, open the door.”

“Who’s me? Don’t know anyone named that, sorry.” You continue to smirk, hearing his patience wearing thin. “Fuckin hell, it’s Joel, will you open the damn door please.” Still knocking but not as frantic, not as loud.

Even though he can’t see you, you playfully tap your chin, “hmm Joel, Joel? Sounds familiar, I’ve got an ex called Joel.” The knocking stops.

Then there were three little taps on the window next to the door, “Will you- will you please open the door, darlin.” You hear a small thud, he rests his head against the window, looking at you, the cloud of his breath, fogging up the glass. Your smile falters. “Where did you go, I looked up and you were gone”.

“Jesus, Joel I left over an hour ago. Took you long enough.”

“No, I heard the door and when I looked out the window you were walking away. Didn’t wanna shout you, I didn’t know what was wrong.”

You stare at him like, are you fuckin for real?

“Are you fuckin for real? I told you what was bothering me and you brushed me off. I was talking and you weren’t listening, so I fucking left. I can’t do this anymore.”

“Jesus fucking Christ, will you open the damn door so we can talk face to face,.. please.”

“No, no way, dude! You just wanna get close so you can do your voodoo shit on me, talking with your draaawl and soothing words, no way buster, not falling for it this time.” You stand straight and cross your arms over your chest and he just laughs. You let him get it out of his system, “ya know, this laughing isn’t helping your case.” It looks like he wipes away a literal tear, “oh sweetheart, you’re the funniest fuckin person I know,” he shakes his head and whispers “voodoo shit”.

It’s the truth isn’t it. He gets near you and his voice, so deep and goddamn sexy just lures you in, the lingering scent of him of cedar, whiskey and his words, oh Christ, his words of adoration and admiration that glue themselves into your soul, you’re always gonna go back. Always. He’s seethed himself into you. And as much as you hate to admit it, you don’t wanna be without him. Fuck. So you open the door, ready for wharever comes.

He steps in and goes for a hug, you stop him. “Why you here, Joel. I don’t wanna be with you anymore-“ the words felt so harsh, his face drops, “-I’m sick of always talking and you never listening, I fuckin hate it when those girls do all that shit around me, and you think it’s a big joke, which means I’m not paranoid, you let it happen. Maybe you should be with a younger one, ya know. One that’s not nearing to menopause and can still pop out lots of babies for you-” You drop your shoulders, “-you say you don’t want that stuff, but I think you do. You’re just, riding this out with me being a dick so I’ll end it with you, well, you got what you wanted.”

He grabs your shoulders and makes you face him, “you don’t know a goddamn thing about what I want, those young women, bah, not worth my damn time. All they do is fuckin talk, about shit. And all that touchy feely bullshit, I don’t like that crap, I don’t wan’em touchin me and besides, they couldn’t handle me like you can.” He goes to pull you in but pauses, like he’s asking for permission. You slightly nod. “they’re just little girls, and you, Christ, are all woman and that’s what I want.” He rests his hand on your lower back and kisses your crown. “All serious though, darlin. I only want you. You’re the light of my life, the pain in my ass but you’re all mine. And there’s no way I’m letting you go. Ya stuck with me til one of us drops dead, sweetheart.”

You pull away from him, cold from his absence and place your hand on his chest, tilting your head sideways, “oh, Joel, that’s the most romantic thing I’ve ever heard. And it was from you.” You’re half joking and half serious. It WAS the most romantic thing that’s ever been said to you. And Joel Miller said it. He rolls his eyes and pulls you back in and squeezes you tight, practically crushing you. “So, are we back together then, darlin” he grabs your ass, growling into neck, “cause I was thinking, we didn’t have the break up sex so, that’s happening, and if we’re back together-“, he picks you up and props you over his shoulder,

“-make up sex, darlin.” After a night of frantic love making, doing every position Joel could think of, the next night, you find yourself in The Tipsy Bison.

You’re sitting at booth with Tommy, Eugene, Maria and Mr misery guts, talking about bullshit theories about the infected. “Ellie said, it was stalking her rather than just attacking-“ Tommy goes on. “-well we’ll go to the warehouse and have a look around, more people if things go south” Maria suggests, taking a sip of her drink. Joel stands from the booth, “going the bar, anyone want anything?” A lot of ‘nos’ but you need a whiskey, you lean forward and grab his arm, “I’ll have what you’re having, cowboy.” Giving his veiny arm a little squeeze. He leans forward, ghosting your ear, “Anything for you, baby.” You watch him walk away, goddamn that peach of his. Wanna leave teeth marks on that thing.

You go back to talking to the group, and after a few minutes, it’s like your spidey senses go off. You look to the bar and you see three girls talking to Joel. One of the little bitches touching his arm. What the hell is she wearing, You think to yourself. You watch as he points to you, shit, have I gotta wave? Or smile or what, dude? After everything last night, you didn’t have the energy in you so you turn back to talk about those fuckin theories.

You don’t know what he said to them, but you see them shuffle off, tails between their legs, all flustered, and Joel, walking back with two amber drinks. He sits his ass down, sliding you the drink, “you ok? Did you let them down gently?” You say it with a smirk. “Yeah they won’t be botherin me again, thank Christ. Voices like nails on a chalkboard.” You let out a soft laugh and Joel wraps his arm around your shoulders, pulling you in to kiss your temple. The night goes on, and you keep side eying those young women, they’re sitting at their table giving glares to you every so often, you can’t help but lean up and kiss Joel on the cheek, resting back down against his shoulder, smirking at them.

Old woman: 1 Young Bitches: 0

Joel at the bar:

“Oh hi, Mr Miller. Can we buy you a drink?”

There were three of them, wearing skirts that were up their asses, tops hung so low and smelling of those awful strawberry drinks.

“Nah thanks girls, I’m good, I’m treating myself and my lady over there.” They follow your finger, landing on your Love, “yeah she’s the best, having like a date night, so getting the good stuff” And like she can hear you talking about her, she turns to face the bar, seeing a brunette holding his arm, she drops her arm off you and starts twiddling at the hem of her shirt. “Oh you’re with her? I heard you like em younger, Mr Miller not ya know old.”

You want this conversation over, “I do, and I’m with her, sweet young ass on her, so-anyway girls gotta head to my woman so, g’night.” They walk off, well shuffle off and you head back over to the booth, swirling the drinks around, you park your ass and wrap your arm around her. Fuck she smells divine.

Throughout the night, you keep noticing her looking over at the table where the young women were at. And one of the times, she leans up and kisses your cheek, knowing full well it was for show. You didn’t mind.

Do what you gotta do to claim me, darlin.