Oct 16, 2015
you actually make me smile so much. you're always so sweet and kind. I think I'm making a right choice for once, thanks to you. take all the time you need, but I'll be waiting and hoping that you'll say yes.
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you actually make me smile so much. you're always so sweet and kind. I think I'm making a right choice for once, thanks to you. take all the time you need, but I'll be waiting and hoping that you'll say yes.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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I'm just waiting for a healthy relationship. with you, it wasn't like that. looking back on it now, I can pinpoint all of the issues and explain exactly how it wasn't healthy at all really. nowhere near as bad as the abusive ex I had, but still unhealthy. I don't want to jump into a relationship again really, not even with Anthony. that's why I'm taking it slow with him. not really rushing it, just starting out with some dates before going steady, making sure it's not forced... but, already, he's proving to be a good match for a healthy relationship. he checks up on me, likes to make sure I'm really doing okay... although he doesn't always have the best response or advice, he still shows that he's here and really offers to listen, like no one else ever does. he's boyfriend material. definitely a keeper. and definitely one I'm willing to wait for.
okay so literally everyone but anthony knows I like him at this point. so i was talking about it with alexis, saying i was too afraid to ask if he had a girlfriend because i didn’t want to risk it being awkward between us and all if he doesn’t feel the same about me.
so we had some downtime where like nobody had any customers. i was just chatting with anthony as we walked back up to alexis and this older guy we work with, and she’s talking about how she wants a boyfriend and all of this. i casually just start leveling candy to look busy.
THEN OUT OF NOWHERE she looks at anthony and is like “you got a girlfriend??” and he’s just like “no”. so my heart already picks up speed because i’m like YAS BITCH YAS THANK YOU.... BUT THEN SHE KEPT GOING AND WAS LIKE “do you want one” and i started panicking because you know i’m standing right here like literally not even a foot away. so he replies with “i don’t know, maybe, why?”
and i have never been so happy to get a customer come through my line. i instantly spun around when that was said and got a customer. perfect timing. after that anthony went down to the other end, and i didn’t get to say anything to him at all other than wave bye as i was leaving.
part of me hopes he didn’t catch on, but i also kinda hope he did. either on his break or when he gets off, he might text me if he caught on. we’ll see. i’m worried.
UPDATE OF GOOD NEWS AND BAD NEWS. Good news: He's single!!! Bad news: It was made very high key obvious that I have this huge crush on him. I'll give a full update when I'm home.
Anthony is so great and i want to tell him I like him but I feel like there's no hope that he'll like me back and I don't want to risk ruining our friendship at all.
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oh, so people every time I meet someone, very soon after I'll give them my phone number and be like "if you need anything at all, let me know" and they'll kinda just be like "yeah, you too" but never really mean it. yesterday for the three hours I was at work in the afternoon, Anthony was there and saw I was upset. so I told him the simple version of what was wrong. and, for the first time in a very long time, someone offered to me first to talk to them if I need it. I was pretty happy with that, but, due to my mental state in that moment, I was convinced he didn't mean it. so, I went home and went straight to bed because I was so upset, passed out around 10:30. I woke up this morning to find a text from him. this kid literally worked an 11hr shift and was so tired and all, but still kept me in his thoughts and wanted to check in on me when he got off work. that honestly means so much to me to know that he actually does care like that. he's a keeper.
When her arms wound around his neck he allowed himself to touch her--he hadn't realized he had been denying himself that privilege until that moment--his arms wrapping around her body. Feeling her give in was wonderful and he continued to drink from her, savoring her taste.
My willpower and body both buckled at his gentle touch. I practically collapsed in his arms, surrendering totally.
Suddenly, as my head fell backwards, I feel the hypotension-like ringing in my head and if I hadn’t fallen into his arms before, I would have then. I groaned, not wanting it to stop, and reluctantly withdrew my arms from around his figure to push lightly at his shoulders.
"Enough," was all the signal I had the strength to whisper.