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What Tolkien Officially Said About Elf Sex
A cross-referenced list of everything Tolkien said about elf sex. Rated PG, with actual footnotes and bibliographic references. Some readers visit for a laugh, some for information. Make of it what you will!
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"It was the act of bodily union that achieved marriage... it was at all times lawful for any of the Eldar, both being unwed, to marry thus of free consent one to the other without ceremony or witness… in flight and exile and wandering, such marriages were often made." Tolkien then proceeds immediately to a discussion of begetting of children. So, "marrying thus of free consent" means that the elf-man and elf-woman involved agree to be life partners, and that there is no excuse for elf casual sex.
Ansereg: What Tolkien officially said about elf sex.
Among the elf people of the Noldor, elf women make bread. "Yet the cooking and preparing of other food is generally a task and pleasure of (elf-)men.
Ansereg: What Tolkien officially said about elf sex.
This exquisite leather cuff or arm band will last you a lifetime. It was made in Wellington, New Zealand from supple vegetable tanned cowhide. This is a natural product with unique colour and texture variations. The cuff features one snap lock cap and two sockets, to fit two wrist sizes: 7.5 in (190mm) and 8.3 in (210mm). These are sturdy chrome coloured fasteners. The jet black leather is embossed with Dwarven Decorations such as one might find on pillars and in halls of Erebor or Moria or other Dwarven strongholds.
* In 2005 I got a bunch of Weta leather keychains as gifts for friends and they were pretty sweet, so these are good stuff, too.
*Surely these are not large enough for the mighty thews of Thorin or Dwalin.
* Sometimes IT JUST WRITES ITSELF
