#annadream

awww baby’s first rongzhi fic! for me, writing for a new fandom for the first time is terrifying. my first fics are usually similar, in a sense: they’re short, emotionally-driven fics with little dialogue, where my main goal is to explore a character/dynamic and what feels ~right~ for me. i wrote this fic in a daze while on my work lunch break lol.

to be alone with you is about being young, in love, and reveling in something you didn’t think you’d ever have. this looks different from wang zhi’s and ding rong’s perspectives. i wanted to give wang zhi an opportunity to act his age - impulsive, reckless decisions born from being absolutely smitten. after all, wang zhi had to grow up incredibly fast. at 17, he shouldn’t have been leading a whole ass western depot; he should’ve been goofing around with other teens his age, falling in love, and living his own life. but that’s not the fate of young eunuchs, especially not ones in his position. so, this is me giving wang zhi a moment to be young and dumb. it’s the equivalent of pulling your coworker/partner into the work break room and having a quick makeout session before you go back to the floor.

for ding rong, the thrill of experiencing something he didn’t think he’d have is less about the physical act, and more that he gets to have this with wang zhi. i wrote this fic from his POV because i wanted to get into his head, and try to work out what a happy ending would like for them down the road. and i think a couple of things are going through ding rong’s mind in this happy ending, mainly that there’s multiple levels to his disbelief: that he is 1) forgiven 2) respected) and 3) loved. he knows he doesn’t deserve wang zhi’s forgiveness; yet, he has it. all he really wanted from wang zhi was acknowledgement and respect; yet, wang zhi somehow did the impossible, but not only respecting him, but loving him back. that’s heavy stuff for a man who expected to die for his betrayal, and i think the sheer wonder of this is a source of awe for ding rong for a long time.

this snippet is about ding rong just being overwhelmed by these feelings and expressing them the best he can with touch. he’s allowing himself to to be swept up in the moment that wang zhi has stolen for them, tucked away in ding rong’s little office, just because he wanted to kiss his man silly. he knows that they’ll have to go back into the depot lobby again, where they’ll once again step into the roles and positions that their jobs demand of them. but for now, in this little carved out space and time, he is happy, in love, and trying to pour all his love and gratitude that he can into these kisses and touches. because, as hozier sings in the song i took the fic title from, it feels good to be alone with you. <3

this is from the intricate brocade of this happiness ~~~

buahaha this short oneshot was my first attempt at writing “spicier” things (you can tell it’s my first attempt because it’s actually really fucking tame)

but i’m still proud of it! because i’ve said before that i don’t know how to write people making out and therefore i tend to dress up sexual tension in pretty metaphors and fade-to-blacks... think of me using a lot of lens flares if i ever directed a video or something

i want it to be pretty, i want it to be warm and gentle and soft. maybe one day i’ll write something that’s like actually explicit and without any Feelings but i don’t think it’s gonna be anytime soon ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ (i literally made myself uncomfy just by thinking about it lol)

anyway this particular exchange is part of what i think rongzhi’s banter looks like: lots of teasing, and lots of insecurity carefully packaged behind very tentative teasing.

i said this in a previous ask that their love may not be “new” exactly, but it’s still a different chapter of their story so to speak. perhaps they’ve loved each other all along, but this the first time they’re taking a step back to realize: yes, i have chosen to love you, i have chosen to trust you.

loving each other, being at each other’s side—this surely is like breathing for them. but recognizing the weight of it, the burden and the freedom of it, that’s new. and that’s difficult.

so here is Ding Rong testing the boundaries, calling his Commander, his lover, his Wang Zhi impetuous and purposefully bringing up someone WZ was implied to have some sort of “relationship” with in “a string of paper cranes”. he wants to see how much he can push Wang Zhi’s buttons, how much Wang Zhi will indulge him and trust him. it’s the way they navigate this new dimension of their power dynamic.

Wang Zhi responds with some irritation, though it’s more just because he wants Ding Rong to focus on him, on them in this moment, drawn so close to each other that they could be tangled up with each other inextricably. (that could be a string pun if you stand far away enough and squint, right?)

and of course Wang Zhi doesn’t want his silly lieutenant thinking silly things. he wants this too be good for the both of them, he wants to be good for Ding Rong and make good memories for and with Ding Rong. he wants the rest of his life with Ding Rong to be good. so he assures the man: i want you, i want you. anyone else Wang Zhi might’ve invited into his bed, into his arms, against his mouth will never compare. anyone else would simply be business, whatever must be done for the Ming Dynasty. but Ding Rong, Ding Rong is because Wang Zhi wants to, because Wang Zhi loves him.

it’s another reminder that their budding “official” relationship is not because Wang Zhi feels like he owes Ding Rong anything. this isn’t gratitude. this is love, the two of them together and in love.

so of course whatever is Ding Rong’s is Wang Zhi’s. i talked a lot about in asopc that servants don’t get to “have” things, don’t get to “own” things. there was a lot of focus of Wang Zhi trying to understand whether or not his life truly belonged to him (or the Emperor). 

but this love is theirs and theirs alone. no one can take that away from them.

i think every person who walks this earth has that at least, the choice and ability to love and be loved in turn. it’s a right we are all born with. 

how can i find the words to say (love has surely shifted my way)

by annadream

G, 7k, jinyi

Summary:  Jingyi’s steely eyes blazed brighter than the flames surrounding them and in that moment Jin Ling knew he was in love with this loud, obnoxious fool.

or

Jin Ling falls in love, Jingyi is a romantic, and Jiang Cheng is a good uncle.

My comment:  Awwwww.

post canon, fire, (brief), fluff, getting together, falling in love, pining, crushes, courtship, pov jin ling, pov lan jingyi, jiang cheng’s avuncular powers, insecure jin ling, marriage proposal, love confessions, first kiss, @annadream

1st rule: tag 9 people! 

2nd rule: bold statements that are true

Appearance: I am 5'7" or taller · I wear glasses · I have at least one tattoo · I have at least one piercing · I have blonde hair · I have brown eyes · I have short hair · my abs are at least somewhat defined · I have or have had braces

Personality: · I love meeting new people · people tell me that I’m funny · helping others with their problems is a big priority for me · I enjoy physical challenges · I enjoy mental challenges · I’m playfully rude with people I know well · I started saying something ironically and now I can’t stop saying it · there is something I would change about my personality

Ability: · I can sing well · I can play an instrument · I can do over 30 pushups without stopping · I’m a fast runner · I can draw well · I have a good memory · I’m good at doing math in my head · I can hold my breath underwater for over a minute · I have beaten at least 2 people in arm wrestling · I know how to cook at least 3 meals from scratch · I know how to throw a proper punch

Hobbies: · i enjoy playing sports · i’m on a sports team at my school or somewhere else (when I was in school I was) · i’m in an orchestra or choir at my school or somewhere else (was in choir and orchestra in school) · i have learned a new song in the past week · i work out at least once a week · i’ve gone for runs at least once a  week in the warmer months · i have drawn something in the past month · i enjoy writing · fandoms are my #1 passion (ish for me) · i do or have done martial arts

Experiences: · i have had my first kiss · i have had alcohol · i have scored the winning goal in a sports game · i have watched an entire season of a tv show in one sitting · i have been at an overnight event · i have been in a taxi ·i have been in the hospital or er in the past year · i have beaten a game in one day · i have visited another country · I have been to one of my favourite band’s concerts

My life: · i have at least one person i consider a best friend · i live close to my school · my parents are still together · i have at least one sibling· i live in the united states · there is snow right now where i live · i have hung out with a friend in the past month · i have an iPhone · i have at least 15 cds · i share my room with someone

Relationships: · i’m in a relationship · i have a crush on a celebrity · i have a crush on someone i know . i have been in at least 3 relationships · i have never been in a relationship · i have asked someone out or admitted my feelings to them · i get  crushes easily · i had a crush on someone for over a year · i have been in a relationship for at least a year · i have had feelings for a friend

WOOHYUN AS HOWL OMGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG

ahhhhhhh tea that’s right! i’ve just found this new lovely tea store that literally has like the NICEST tea combis, like fresh and taiwan bbt standards for real cheap so damnnn, but anyway i lean towards chinese teas rather than english ones for sure:

1. Lemon Red Tea - I just found this in fresh tea bag forms with like real lemon bits and leaves etc., and it tastes even better than like store-made sweet lemon tea for real

2. Wintermelon Milk Tea - A FAVE!!!

3. Osmanthus Oolong Tea - MY ABSOLUTE FAVE for bbt and now with that new store, it comes in teabags too ;-;

4. Pu’er Tea - This is definitely my go-to on a cold day, and you want something fragrant af, like this is the king of fragrance when it comes to Chinese tea

5. Tie Guan Yin Tea - A Chinese classic hahaha

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