#andragorus

This entire revelation of Hilmes' true parentage is so gross but what truly shook me is that it was this man's wish to kill Hilmes.

Osroes was everything to Hilmes. We have seen how much he revered his father's remembrance. His pure, justly father who, he thought, got murdered by Andragorus. Apart from the murder attempt on himself, it was also his father's death that he wanted to avenge, by taking the throne. The cause of all of Hilmes' miseries was the man he devoted his life to :'(

We have seen Hilmes crumbling, panicking many times before and he fought his fears to come back stronger each time. But this time, it's different. It seems Andragorus has snatched away the very foundation of his person. What happened with Hilmes is cruel. And absurd.

He's always so high and mighty so it's kind of....difficult watching him going through identity crisis like this T.T

One character that I took only as seriously as Gieve until now, caught my interest in this chapter. Yup, that's Queen Tahamineh :'D

I never thought I would feel sorry for her but here we are. She's an example of a cursed beauty that people desire, use and accuse for being used at the same time. She was displaced from her roots, handed over from one king to other like an object and bore the blame for everything when the kings and kingdoms failed for whatever reasons (Note what happened in case of Lusitania). Then, she lost her only child and the ability to bear children. She couldn't do anything thing to change her own and her daughter's situation. She's been so powerless, and all of that pent up angst she let out on Arslan.

It's understandable how she would feel. What I don't understand is, though, that how could she resist loving Arslan? He had such a lovable personality even as a child. How could anyone not love him? Maybe her anger thawed at some point and she had to hardened herself consciously. She must have battled with a lot of conflicting feelings.

Anyway, Arslan did nothing to deserve such bitterness. She could, at least, have loved him as just a child, if not in the capacity of a mother.

Until this point, Arslan showed much understanding for her. It is only when he learns that she never tried to connect to him even as a person, let alone a son, that he finally reacts sternly. He is horrified at thought that she expected Arslan to hit someone he called his mother. And also at the reality that his supposedly mother is as ignorant of his feelings as a stranger would be.