#and tequila

when you got drunk last night and wake up to a text from your old situationship saying "how much did you drink last night?" and discover that you spam called him and had a very long conversation with him about wanting to put him in a jar and shake him like a bug. why me

Hi, it’s almost New Years and I love you.

You know what, Diego? I liked Havana Nights, and I ain't even ashamed. Yes, it may still be unopened in the shipping envelope it came in 6 months ago when I bought it for $5 off Amazon, and yes, it may be hidden underneath my Rogue One stuff in my Rogue One lair, but I suffered an "Oooh, Dirty Dancing shipped! I'm so excited!" dig from the person I share my Prime account with, and it was my first descent into total Lunacy. SO I LIKE IT. I will give you a standing O -- and any other O you like -- for it again and again and again (and for as long as you like, too). SO THERE.

yea so i got fired a week ago and i've been on a sex drugs and psychosis bender it's been great

Definitely gettin tacos today after whatever yesterday was…

I got off early tn, which means it’s movie time