#and post!

When he's in a good mood, Floyd Leech is a miracle in the kitchen. You have to wonder where the skill comes from; what is it that merpeople do under the sea, really? He's like a machine with as effortlessly as he lifts one tray from the oven only to immediately replace it with another. Again and again, no regard for how the metal baking sheets scald his fingertips, or the fact that he's made way more batches than you'd asked for.

"And what's Shrimpy think'a that?" He's all bright eyes and sharp teeth, presenting the final tray of cookies with a flourish that doesn't quite suit his bulky frame. It's rare he's in a good mood for this long— perhaps the upcoming holidays have lent you a little luck. "Whaddaya need eight dozen cookies for anyways?"

"I don't need eight dozen," you're only halfway through frosting the second of eight trays, mouth smeared with reds and greens where you'd been taste-testing. "I only needed a batch, but I'm glad you're having fun? We've got more than enough to eat and still have plenty leftover for Santa."

Instantly, Floyd's face shifts— he'd gone through all that trouble, and for what? He snatches up a handful of the frosted cookies and talks around them as he chews. "What do cookiesh have t'do with that red guy?"

Maybe it's a good thing he'd made so many cookies after all, because there's no doubt Floyd could inhale all of them; you try to shield the remainder of your frosted ones, but he just reaches around you.

"It's tradition!" You huff. "Leave cookies and milk out at night— so he has the energy to keep going, or something. I dunno."

"That'sh shtupid." Floyd drapes himself over the end of the kitchen island, still chewing. "Y'know he'sh not real? So we should eat 'em."

You roll your eyes, tucking a few cookies off to the side in the hopes of saving something. "Maybe he is real in this world! Magic exists! I just know I'm not taking any chances. Don't eat them all—"

You're lucky Floyd's mood hasn't shifted too far; very little escapes him, despite his attitude, so he notices the sweets you set aside, but doesn't push for them.

This is what boredom does to a mf

Don't mind the fact I made Tatum's eyes blue instead of brown I forgot to change the color 💔💔