#amyblocks

I dreamed about her for weeks. Months, even. Before I met her. Before I met her, I dreamed about her constantly. I just knew that something was going to happen that was going to change my life. Not all at once. Slowly, like heartache going away. Slowly, like the way you breathe when you’re asleep. Slowly, like my heart when she went away. Slowly, like how I live without her. I knew she was going to change my life, but I didn’t know how. I didn’t know that she would haunt me, saying that this was the way that it was supposed to be. Saying that she was sorry that things had to end this way. It hurt. It hurt me all the time. I was so sad without her. Not sad. Empty, pointless. Raven hair to raven hair, pale eyes to pale eyes. Were we twins? No. We were lovers. The best lovers we’d ever known. She made me happy without the pills, without the drugs, without the breathlessness and the numbness. She made me feel alive instead of dead.

I never imagined that I’d ever want to break up with you. It’s not what I intended, it’s not what I had in mind. I honestly never thought that it would happen this way. Great, we’re a cliché. Just another fucking Breaksgiving couple to add to the never-ending list. It pains me to admit it. It pains me to even think about it. But the truth is, that the distance isn’t what made it happen. We could handle distance if we really loved each other, if we were truly meant to be together. The fact is that we weren’t. We were not meant to be together forever. We needed each other at that exact time, at that exact moment. We needed something from each other, and we took it until we didn’t need it anymore. I broke up with you. I find that shocking, for some reason. I guess because you were such a lady killer. I bet a lot of people assumed that you would break up with me. But that’s not how it happened. You probably would have tried. Not very hard, mind you, but I know you loved me. You were willing to give distance a chance. But it’s just that, Nate… I’m not meant to save you. I can’t. I’d love to. It’d be wonderful. But I can’t save you. No one but you can do that. I hoped I could. But you need to stop this on your own. You’re such a beautiful boy. I want you to become a man on your own. You’re not the type who needed someone to carry you, anyway. You would’ve gotten tired of me eventually, I’m positive of that. I wonder if I could ever have gotten tired of you. Somehow, I doubt it. At least right now, I truly doubt it. 

Amy was born on July 4th, 1994. She is very tall and skeletal thin. She's also rather pale. She has waist length black hair and silver eyes. She wears very artsy things, but her preferred color is black. She's very pretty in a spooky way. She's very happy with her life, but people tend to be in awe of her, and just a little afraid. She is an amazing artist, and was accepted at the Art Institute in Washington D.C. Her favorite things to do are paint and draw anime. She loves hot chocolate. Amy loved Nate's humor from the start. She also wanted to paint him. They started dating on February 14th, which is not only Valentine's Day, but also Nate's birthday. She is very political, and often feels older than Nate and his friends. She does not give a single fuck about what anyone thinks of her, and she gets very good grades. She reads for fun, and sometimes "watches" Nate skate with a book in one hand and a hot chocolate in the other. She lives with her parents, her older sister Carter, her younger brother Sage, her bunny rabbit Snowball, and her two cats, Trixie and Willow.