#amg50

I was nervous to see Anne’s reaction to me, wondering what she would think of it all. A part of me feared she would hate it, because even though I was fully aware she liked me and what our relationship had been, I knew she was clued up on the threats management had made to Harry. I wondered if she could find any happiness when our relationship meant running the risk of them not letting her see her son. The sights became familiar once again. I recognized the beautiful scenery as we neared Anne’s home, my nerves building more and more as we grew closer. My head was humming, creating a deep ache right at the back, my thoughts and predictions becoming worse and worse. I felt like I was drowning in my own fears, like I could physically feel it building up from my toes and rising up my body, growing ever closer to my mouth and my nose and making sure I couldn’t breathe under the harsh crashes of the dark waters. I could see Harry from the driver’s seat sporadically glancing to me. I hadn’t been very good company during the short drive, every conversation seemed to be subconsciously brushed aside, shrugged off or plain ignored. Not purposefully, but my mind was elsewhere. “Anna?” He seemed to shout from nowhere, which proved even more that it was like I couldn’t hear him, the fear induced waters obviously reaching past my ears. I glanced across to him bewildered, seeing the worry and confusion on his face. “What’s wrong?” He asked. “I’m just... I’m scared.” “Why? You know she loves you.” “But it’s not just that anymore, is it? Your mum hates your management for her own reasons. And the risks we’re running... I just don’t want her to hate me for it. I don’t want her to hate that we’re together.” I could tell Harry hadn’t thought of it that way due to his lack of reply. He took a moment, and then he simply sighed, and kept his gaze on the country road ahead of us. We both let the actual depth of the situation sink into us, and I began to question how it was only now springing to mind how selfish the relationship was. It was the first moment where we truly allowed ourselves to take a step back, and see our relationship for what it was, just how messed up it was. It was like we had only thought of our own risks, never mind everyone else’s. Harry ran his hand through his locks, the colour of his skin seeming to weaken and become cold. It seemed the waves were reaching him too. “I don’t know what I’d do if I had to go over a year without you.” He said. “What do you mean?” I asked quietly. “The contract ends next September. But... I’m not sure I could do that. If I had to go that long without you... especially after all this... I think I would lose my fucking mind.” It all seemed to be getting more complicated, the more we actually thought about everything rather than attempting to ignore the complexities. There was no use in the two of us not being together, the fight had already begun, and I agreed with Harry. I couldn’t do over a year with the two of us just pining for one another, or even worse, one getting over the other during the time apart. Both of us moving on. The thought made me tremble. But, traveling there that day just seemed to show the negatives so much. The thought of his mum hating the idea of it, the risks, it all became incredibly apparent. “What will you do? If we get there and she’s not happy?” I questioned. “We’ll deal with that problem if it happens to arrive. Until then, I refuse to be negative about the fact we’re actually together now.” I wondered how Harry could always find the words to make me smile, even at my lowest points, even when it seemed the water had finally covered my body entirely, drowning me, Harry let me gasp for air. He lowered the waves, and it was as simple as that. He had a beautiful control over my body, which I had once feared, but always admired. But the fact I now knew for a fact that Harry saw me in his future, solidly there, the way my body tamed to his call became something I loved. It was quite comforting. We reached the centre of Holmes Chapel, and found ourselves stuck in a bit of traffic. I looked across to him, leaning back into the chair as he looked back, both of us with weird sympathetic smiles on our faces as we did. We shared something in that moment, trapped within our silence, love and trust and this realisation that we weren’t going to be dragged away from one another. After some time of feeling sorry for ourselves, Harry playfully pouted his lips to me, which I returned, making us both giggle as we looked back out to the crowded road. “We’ll be okay, won’t we?” He asked the unanswerable question. “I like to think so.” I cooed. He crinkled his nose and smiled out to the road, simply happy that we were both still there, both trying to ignore the negatives and think of how happy we made each other. I held the heart necklace between my thumb and index finger, happily twisting it back and forth, looking down to it with a ridiculous smile on my face. Harry had been watching me, and thanks to the fact the traffic still lingered, it gave him the opportunity to undo his seatbelt and lean to me, stretching across the car so his lips hovered close to the metal. He exhaled to it, and I watched his breath create a light condensation upon the silver, making his temporary mark upon my heart, soon watching the heat fade away. I flickered my eyes to him, for some reason completely entranced with him in that moment as he looked back to me, and I’m not sure why, but it felt like a rather beautiful moment for us. “I love you.” He whispered. “I love you too.” I returned, just as quietly. He pushed his lips to mine for a moment, breathing me in as the soft, unheated exchange between us made me melt, both of us sobering to the other, my eyes closed as love spoke its language between our lips. The short embrace came to a gentle stop as Harry brushed his nose across mine, making me blush before he moved back to his original position, fastening himself back in place. I kept my eyes on him as he repositioned himself, biting my lip as I gazed to him, absolutely infatuated. Somehow, we had found a way to just let our feelings take over every negativity, to let them enchant us into the state of mind where we knew it was worth the effort, worth running a few risks. Things had been so incredibly passionate since our rekindling, every moment and every touch felt like it was worth writing down. It seemed that with every strength and beat of our pulses we were working together, our feelings doing nothing but mounting. Maybe a part of the passion was simply down to the fact it was a fight, and it was a secret. Regardless, it was so incredibly strong, and I was just falling deeper and deeper. A few more minutes passed before the car could finally move again, making our way out of the centre and to the outskirts where the beautiful house was. We drove down the road, and my mind automatically fell back to the things he had told me the last time my eyes glazed over the building, about how he saw that house and just thought of how it was all worth it, all the bullshit, all the tours, he knew it was worth it when he looked at that house, when he looked at what he could do for people. “Is it still worth it?” I asked. He looked over the house as he drove carefully down the lane, and he automatically knew what I was speaking of. He smiled to it, his eyes glazed with love. “Yes. It always will be.” He told me. Harry’s love for the people who were most important to him would always make me smile, the fact he was more than willing to put up with such awful people dealing with him, and the media, and it all still felt worthwhile, that was something that blew my mind. It just seemed so selfless, to focus on what those he loved gained rather than what he lost. Soon enough we were parked outside the house once again, the sunny afternoon weather making the building ooze beauty even more so than it had done the first time I saw it. My nerves returned like a lightning bolt hitting my body, but they weren’t half as powerful as they had been. Harry turned to me, an encouraging, beautiful smile lining his lips. “Ready?” “As I’ll ever be.” I said honestly. We took ourselves from the car, my heart thudding in my chest as we reached the door, Harry gently thudding to it. I slipped behind him, out of sight, Harry trying to usher me back forward but I just didn’t dare. I felt like I was hiding away from the possible uproar. He nodded, facing back forwards but reaching to hold my hands as I stayed behind his back, his muscular frame blocking me entirely, his thumbs brushing over the top of my hands as I rested my head to his back, trying to calm my nerves as I heard the door swing open. “Harry!” She gasped happily. “What a pleasant surprise! What’re you doing here? Is everything okay?” “Hi. I’m sorry, Mum, I...” He couldn’t word anything that he felt, or the reasons he was there at her door, so instead I was simply pulled from behind him, keeping my gaze low as I smiled to her. I saw her falter, staring at me from the doorway, not saying a word. Of course, my automatic reaction was to think she was displeased, not able to find the words because she was angry or upset. Harry moved and held my hand tight by our sides, silently encouraging his mum to say something, anything. “Anna?” She questioned. “Hi.” I whispered. “Are you two...?” She directed the lingered question to Harry. “As far as management are concerned, no. As far as we’re concerned, yes. We are.” He told her, being firm as he spoke. She looked back down to me, still not even a glimmer of a hint on her face as to how she was feeling about the matter. She hates me. She fucking hates me. I can’t blame her. What if they stop her seeing Harry? I can’t do this. I need to leave. I was literally just about to do a U turn and run away from the situation when she finally reacted, breathing out as though a weight had dropped from her shoulders. “Oh bloody hell, FINALLY!” She exasperated. My eyes widened, and even though I think Harry was expecting her to be happy, he still seemed as shocked as I did as we looked to the smiling woman ahead of us, her hand on her heart as though an ocean of relief had just washed her body. “I was wondering when you two would just get a grip and make a go of it. Oh thank god!” Harry grinned and leapt to her, the two of them sharing an adorable hug which I watched admirably for a while, before I was dragged into it too, Anne, gripping onto my coat and pulling me to the two of them. “Mum!” Harry gasped, pulling away from the hug. “I had no idea you felt like that!” “Harry, you have been miserable for months and you didn’t know I wanted the two of you to at least try things? You can be dense sometimes.” “Heyyyy!” He argued. She dragged us both inside, beaming happy thoughts of our reunion as she wandered off to the kitchen, shouting back over her shoulder something about how she was bored of Harry’s whining when we weren’t together. I giggled, attempting to follow her to the kitchen when I was pulled backwards, Harry lifting me instantly from the ground, my instinct making me wrap my legs around him. He spun us a couple of time, biting his lip during a wide grin as he turned us on the spot, gazing up to me with eyes made of stars. That moment was on another level for us, knowing that we were happy, our families were happy, and we still remained a beautiful secret from the people who could hurt us. It just seemed so perfect, so exceptionally perfect. My cheeks strained at the size of my grin. He pressed his lips sweetly to mine, for just a moment, before looking back to me, shaking his head as though bewildered by his happiness. ”I want to meet your dad!” I said excitedly. He chuckled heavily, more than amused by my giddiness, how excited I suddenly was about everything. I was a bundle of positivity. “And your sister!” I beamed. “No need for wishful thinking there.” The female voice completely caught me off guard, making Harry drop me in a second, but my feet had met the ground as though fully expecting it, the two of us scarily in sync. We turned to where the voice had come from, and I was met by a beautiful blonde girl smiling to us, rolling her eyes a little as though rolling away the fact she had just seen a girl with her legs wrapped around her younger brother. It wasn’t the ideal way to meet her, in the grand scheme of things. Embarrassment stopped me from running and giving her a hug, but I was especially aware at that point that it could have been under worse circumstances. “Gem? I didn’t know were here.” Harry startled. “Same goes, Junior.” She smiled. He moved and gave her a tight hug, and she mumbled something to his ear which I couldn’t work out but it made him smile, and that was all that mattered to me. When the hug ended they stood side by side both simply looking at me, and she had an unreadable look on her face, but all I could think about was how the genes in the Styles family were unbelievable. I gave her a nervous wave, which made her laugh. “I’m not going to bite your head off,” She stated, eyes wide. “I’m actually quite nice.” “I wouldn’t believe that if I was you.” Harry winked to me. She hit him hard in the balls, and he tried to force a laugh and make out as though he had some control of the situation, but his groan was palpable, clutching to the bottom of his stomach, almost falling to his knees. I tried to hide my laughter but I couldn’t, a small giggle escaping my mouth before I quickly covered it with my hand. She was still looking at me, the same gaze in her eyes. “It’s weird.” She started. “I feel a little starstruck.” That felt like a first. I strayed from my minor fame as much as I could, only really focusing on AM Girl at events and for videos, so it must have been the first time someone declared they felt starstruck, about me! I had no reply to that; I had seen people stare before, but I was never really approached or anything, I had never really done anything. So hearing someone refer to themselves as starstruck on account of me just didn’t seem to register. “I’m a big AM fan.” She nodded. “Oh.” That was all I could say. Nice one, Anna. Good first impression. Nice conversational skills. “When I heard it was you Harry was with, I jumped up and down like a right idiot. Thought it was well exciting.” “You never told me that?” I directed to Harry. He still gripped onto his stomach, and though he tried to speak he couldn’t quite get anything out, his throat strained and dry. Myself and Gemma both laughed at him, causing him to shake his head, probably hating the fact we were both seemingly ganging up on him already. “Anyway,” She brushed. “Nice to meet you, finally. Gemma.” She held her hand out to me, which I quickly took in mine and shook firmly, looking her in the eye as I did so. “I’m Anna. It’s good to meet you too.” “I’m the better sibling, by the way.” “I totally believe you. Don’t tell Harry, but I think he’s a bit of an arse.” “Fuck you both!” He groaned from beside us.

I clambered into bed, wearing an over-sized t-shirt courtesy of Harry, biting my lip as I first placed a kiss to his lips, before sliding down into bed with him, both of us laying on our sides and looking to each other. He brushed the back of his fingers over my cheek, his eyes seeming to be the colour of summer as he looked to me, so happy, so peaceful. I hummed appreciatively, nudging closer to his warm touch. He moved closer to me, and I draped a leg over his hip. Even after so long, I still found myself blushing thanks to him, like our relationship was fresh. Butterflies irrupted in their thousands in the pit of my stomach, that fond sickly feeling returning to my stomach for what felt like the millionth time. He brushed his nose to mine, finding the necklace and leaning down to kiss it, making me flutter. I often found myself in a trance when it came to our embraces, nothing else mattered but the two of us and what we felt. “These past two days have been perfect.” He whispered. “I know. It’s so nice that everyone is as happy about this as we are. I think I was expecting the worst, so… it’s just amazing.” “Are we keeping it quiet from everyone else? For now?” “I think that would probably be for the best.” I hushed. We shrugged past the moment, not letting it affect our incredible moods as he moved his lips to mine, our mouths automatically opening wide together, our tongues brushing together beautifully. He moved between my legs, hitching up the t-shirt quickly, taking it from my body. I moaned against his lips as he pushed to me, feeling him harden between me as he palmed to my breast, massaging to my nipple and grinding his hips closer to me, gently taking my lip between his teeth as he did. “You’re so beautiful, Honey.” He grunted down to me. I breathed out a moan, rolling my head backwards, giving him full access to my neck which he quickly took, biting and sucking away at the sensitive skin, gripping a little tighter to my breast, the encounter becoming a little rough as he marked my skin, crushing into me. I tugged on the back of his hair, his teeth gritted with sex as I pulled him to look at me, biting my lip and trailing my hand down my body, beginning to play with myself. Harry looked down to me, cursing as he enjoyed the sights. “I love it when you do that for me.” He moaned. “I touch myself when I think of you.” I gasped. “I’m so fucking hard for you, Honey.” He directed and then pushed into me, one of the loudest moans I had ever heard emptying his mouth, his lips seeming to plump and pinken as he thrust into me, so beautiful, so lost in the moment. I took my fingernails down his back, probably leaving red marks to his delicate skin as he moved into me, eyes closed and mind on another planet as we worked together, fucking me into oblivion. I then grabbed onto his arse-cheeks, digging my nails into him, causing him to curse and moan and writhe around even more, seemingly lost in the moment. He tugged at my ear with his teeth, both of our touches so hot and heavy but the pain of the actions just translated as pleasure. “Let me fuck you from behind, Baby.” He roughly panted to my ear. I quickly turned, so my breasts were flat to the mattress, my arse in the air and my legs parted. Harry slowly eased into me, both of us moaning in time with each other as he filled me, before he began pounding into me. With each thrust I gave a stifled moan, hardly even able to comprehend how beautifully harsh his thrusts were. He slapped his palm against my skin, my bum stinging under his touch. “You know the word.” He grunted, still pushing. “Yes!” I panted. He hit me again, my eyes gripping shut as he kept taking me further, pushing wonderful rough love into me, so quick and precise. He hit me again, but instead of whipping his palm away he dug his fingers into me. I could feel his nails prodding into my skin. My back arched upwards, then on all fours as he gripped onto me like he was gripping for dear life. He moved so his body lay on mine, biting the bottom of my neck. I pushed myself back to him, our bodies becoming slightly upright together as he remained inside me, kissing over the sore spot he had just created with his beautiful teeth. He thrust a few more weak pushes into me before we finished together, his arms wrapped around my waist, his flat stomach pressed to my back as we shuddered together, enjoying our orgasms with each other, our hot, clammy bodies combined. We panted through the feeling, staying in the same position as we calmed from the incredible work out. Harry placed gentle kisses to my cheek, wrapping his arms so tightly around me, so deeply in love. ”Everything’s going to be okay.” He whispered to my skin. “It’s me and you.”