#ames writes

~~

Emmet had broken his arm as a kid. He remembered gasping for breath, holding the injured limb to his chest, unable to focus on anything else as all other thoughts were pushed out of his head. At the time, he thought it was the worst pain he could possibly feel. He was wrong, losing his twin was far worse.

It might not have been physical like a broken bone, but the pain nagged at him constantly. And unlike a broken bone, this seemed incapable of healing.

He was a twin, that was his truth, something he had known all his life. He and Ingo had promised each other that they would always be together, it was their ideal and truth.

But now, it was slowly becoming a lie

Because Ingo was gone.

Emmet didn't know where he went, why he left. Had his brother wanted to leave, had he gotten tired of being here? Had something happened? A terrible thought lurked in the back of his mind, his brother left because he felt smothered and needed space to find his own identity, a new truth.

There was a mirror that he had covered up, because Emmet would catch a glimpse of his reflection and his heart would leap, only to crash back down to reality. It wasn't his brother, it was just himself.

One day, he reached out and touched the smooth glass, staring at himself. "I am Emmet, I hate mirrors," he mumbled, wishing he was with his other half, instead of just a reflection. "I tell myself that your right here with me, but that is a lie."

Pulling his hand back, he sighed. "I am Emmet and I hate liars." He had to face reality, his brother wasn't here. He had too stop lying to himself, he was alone.

After that, he took a sheet and used it to cover the mirror, so he wouldn't have to deal with that misery any longer.

He hoped Ingo would be back soon, because he needed his brother. That hurt worst of all, not knowing that his twin was okay. But Emmet didn't know what else he could do, except keep on living. Keep going to work, keep battling with Pokemon, keep running the subway.

What else could he do?

But that thought still lurked in the back of his mind. If he was a twin, but his twin had disappeared, did that still count if one half of the equation was missing?

YOU

YOU WATCHED ME DOODLE THIS AFTER GIVING ME THAT PROMT LAST NIGHT

WHY MUST YOU REUSE THE ANGST BAT AGAINST ME

Crossing the Abyss

A story by me @northernxstories for @vikingsbigbang2022.

Thank you to the two fantastic artists who volunteered to make amazing art for my story based on a very short synopsis namely @ivarthebadbitch and @vikingstrash.

Check it out now on A03 [click here]

Please let me express my sincere appreciation for

@vikingstrash

and

@serasvictoria

for organizing this event. 

Gif above is by @ivarthebadbitch and cute little banner below by @vikingstrash​.

Wade kindly patted his shoulder, carefully adjusting his scarf so it hide his scars. "Buddy, I'm not going to force you to come, but I think it would be good if you got out of the house."

Eclipse wasn't sure about that, "what if it's not allowed?"

"Silver and Shadow come to the grocery store with me all the time," Wade said gently. "There's no rules about anyone not being welcome there."

Holding onto his tail, Eclipse didn't know what to say. It was full of humans, ones that sometimes gave him sharp looks. What if someone yelled for him to leave? Staying in the house was safer.

"If you come with me, we'll get a treat," Wade promised. "Just you and me."

That was tempting, the hedgehogs were off at school. Eclipse didn't have to go, he just stayed with Wade most of the time. That was good, because he had heard Silver talk about it and wasn't sure he would like it.

"A good treat?" He asked timidly.

Wade offered his hand, "Yeah, come on."

Taking it, Eclipse followed him. It was a bit odd that he was the same size as the human, but didn't feel like an adult like he was. But that wasn't Eclipse's fault.

He followed Wade out to the car, let Wade buckle him in and put a hot water bottle in his lap and then the two of them were off.

To the grocery store.

Eclipse didn't know why this upset him so much, he was adjusting to a whole new life. Trying to find a way to live with his brain, when it constantly screamed that he might be in danger again.

Like right now, as they pulled into the grocery store parking lot. Eclipse saw all the humans walking in and out of the store and froze. "I can't-"

"Come on Eclipse, we'll just grab a few things." Wade said, "and then we'll get a treat."

Against his better judgement, Eclipse followed him inside.

Sometimes it was an embarrassing, he had done powerful things. done dangerous missions. But it had always been under GUN, now he was away from them and he didn't know who the enemy was, or how much Wade could keep him safe. The man said he would, but Eclipse had doubts on his ability to do that.

At first it was fine, Eclipse could feel people staring at him, but no one said anything. He stayed close to Wade, watching as he selected food and put them into his cart.

"You want to pick out a cereal?" Wade asked.

Eclipse didn't, what if he made the wrong choice? But Wade had asked him, so he looked at the selection carefully. There was no many choices and he had never heard of any of this before.

"I'm going to grab something right down there," Wade said, pointing to the end of the aisle. "I'll be right back."

For a moment, Eclipse thought about running after him, begging him to stay. But that made him sound pathetic, he could handle being away from Wade for a few seconds?

He went back to focusing on the selection of cereal, trying to figure out which one he should get. Maybe he should just pick randomly.

And then he heard it, soft whispers from another person.

"-shouldn't be allowed in here. What if it attacks someone?"

Eclipse lifted his head, turned toward the person who said it.

Two tall women, standing not that far from him, both pretending like neither were glaring at him. "Why would he bring that dangerous thing in here? What if someone had kids with them?"

These two humans hated him.

At that, Eclipse felt like his head was spinning. He wasn't wanted here, they thought he was dangerous. They were right... he had been dangerous before. But it wasn't as if he might attack someone here and now.

They didn't want him here.

Sitting down on the floor, he hugged his knees to his chest and hid his face. Eclipse knew he shouldn't have come here, he should of stayed home, where he didn't bother anyone and where it was safe.

A few moments later, Wade was back, kneeling down to him, "buddy, what's wrong?"

"I'm not wanted here," Eclipse sobbed. He didn't want to get up, even when Wade asked him to. Finally, he was lifted into the cart and he curled into a ball, hoping no one could see him.

He was sorry, so so so sorry, he would never make a terrible mistake like this again.

Even when Wade reassured him that it wasn't his fault, that he was allowed in public, Eclipse didn't believe him. What if next time, someone got angry at him, someone yelled? What if he became so overwhelmed, he couldn't handle it?

It was better not to risk it.

Even when Wade got him lunch, he couldn't eat it, just stared sadly at the meal in front of him and wished it mean something else besides the fact he would never fit into this world.

YOU CANT DO THIS TO ME AMES STOP(dont)

MY HEART CANT TAKE IT AAAAAAAAAA T^T

-

Bad things always seemed to happen in pairs. Eclipse knew this, it wasn't the first time his life was turned upside down. But it still hurt all the same.

First it was his son, Dally, deeply injured by wounds from battle. Eclipse couldn't let him see how worried he actually was. When Dally died from his wounds, Eclipse kept a smile on his face the entire time.

And then he was gone.

Days later, still in morning, Eclipse's grief deepened when his daughter Lilith died of pneumonia. Some dad he was, he hadn't even known she was sick. What kind of father was he, when he hadn't even been aware she had been struggling?

Both of them had been adults, Dally was 54 and Lilith had been 51. But to him, they were still his babies. Especially since those two had been the first ever kids he had ever rescued and adopted. The beginning of the Red Arms Rebellion.

Eclipse had always know this day would come. All his kids, including those two, were mortal. He could see it in the way time changed them, how wrinkles grew around their eyes and their fur turned grey. But it didn't make the pain any easier.

Now he couldn't do anything.

Over the years, Eclipse had created a village for himself and his adopted kids. Every time he found children who had been orphaned, he brought them here. Eclipse wasn't naive enough to think he could fix everything or protect them from the flame creatures that were slowly destroying the planet, but their little village was a little haven. A bit of safety.

But that didn't mean they were safe from death's cold fingers finding them.

Dally and Lilith had been his first kids. The very first. And now they were gone.

Eclipse knew there was so much he needed to do, things to check in on but how could he? He had raised and fed and protected and loved both of them dearly, but now they weren't here anymore. His beloved first kids were dead. Gone. Just like the rest of his adopted kids would be. Some day, all of them would be dead.

And he would still be here.

The thought was enough to keep him in bed, his only company his misery and grief. He had already burned through his rage and anger, attacking some ruins of an empty city until it was gone and there wasn't any excuse for him to ignore this part any longer.

Some of the older kids came in looking for him, tried to talk to him, but he couldn't entertain any of them at the moment. Eclipse just wanted to be alone with his sorrow.

Until he heard footsteps coming toward him. And a deep, calm voice said, "Eclipse."

That was enough to make the darkling sit up in surprise. Because Shadow was standing there.

It had been years since the last time they saw each other. In the past, that was because of how much they fought, arguing over every little thing. Now it was because of how busy they were, Eclipse was caring for his village and massive family, while Shadow was on Angel Island.

"What are you doing here?" Eclipse asked, blinking a few times in shock.

Shadow came toward and sat down on the edge of the bed, "your kids are worried about you. One came up to the island to get me."

"Who?"

A that, Shadow only shrugged. "Not sure. But he said you're not doing well."

Eclipse thought about lying, about snarling and snapping and telling Shadow to leave, that he didn't need his help. But that was something he would have done when he was younger. Now, things were different. A person couldn't survive all alone.

"Dally and Lilith died," he muttered.

As soon as she said that, something changed in his brother's expression. And then Eclipse was in Shadow's arms, sobbing against his shoulder.

In the village, he had to be strong. He was the leader, the dad, taking care of all his kids. Most of the time, he enjoyed it and didn't mind. But at times like this, Eclipse realized how badly he just wanted his big brother to comfort him, to say kind words and take care of him for once.

Years ago, they wouldn't have been able to do this, the two of them had been so wrapped in fighting over stupid shit. But now, they could just be brothers.

The decades had mellowed Shadow out. He was never going to be a cuddly person who looked for hugs, but he no longer reacted like someone was electrocuting him every time he was touched.

"What happened?" Shadow had known them, after he first adopted them, Eclipse insisted on his kids meeting their new uncle. But it had been a while since he had come to visit.

Eclipse wiped at his eyes, "injury and sickness." His voice broke. "None of them are immortal like we are... they'll all go someday..."

His brother released him, "That will happen," he said quietly. "And it will hurt. But that just means you loved them. And it's better to have those good memories then to not have those moments at all."

Taking a deep breath, Eclipse looked up at him, "you're sure?"

A nod. "I am," Shadow stood up. "C'mon, we can hold a funeral for them and set up a grave site."

That sounded painful, but not having to face it alone made it a bit easier. Being able to bask in the competency of his older brother would soften this painful blow. Swallowing, Eclipse got to his feet. "Can you stay a few days?" That was a hard thing to ask, since Knuckles died, Shadow had taken over watching the Master Emerald, leaving it for long periods of time was not wise.

Shadow patted his shoulder, a look of almost amusement on his face. "Of course. Where else would I be?"

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

AMES

AMES WHAT THE FUCK

I was silently sobbing in the bus the whole trip back to the dorms!!!! TuT

The brothers the ever!!! I LOVE THIS SO SO MUCH!!!! VERY DEAR TO MY HEART THESE TWO <3 <3

Let me,,,,

-

Shadow had never had an easy relationship with his brother.

Eclipse had been created to kill him, but then he couldn't and Shadow had destroyed the Black Arms. Which Eclipse felt he had to get revenge for. It had turned into an endless cycle of strikes and vengeance against each other. The two of them had always been stubborn and vicious. Neither one ever giving a single inch toward each other.

Except now, something had happened.

Shadow was a father.

He and Sonic had been granted two little babies.

There was something to be said about children, it was very difficult to hold a tiny child in his arms, to look upon their sweet, innocent faces and feel nothing but awe. To want to protect them.

It also made Shadow realized his children, these sweet darlings, could not see the cycle of violence he had with Eclipse. What if the two of them tried to emulate it?

He couldn't even bring himself to imagine them actually hurting each other. As siblings, he knew they would fight in the future, get annoyed with each other, but actually attempt to seriously cause each other harm?

Shadow didn't want to face his brother, so he just sent him a note, explaining that he was done fighting with him. Maybe in the future, they could work on something better, but to leave it as this right now.

For a long time, that's what was it. The two of them in a strange position of no longer being active enemies but also not working toward being better siblings either.

Shadow wasn't even sure if Eclipse was aware of the changes that had happened to him, but he didn't want the darkling to know either. What if he tried to use the twins against him?

For his part, Sonic just stayed out of it. The two of them were busy, they had young children that needed care. Their days will full of the joys and frustrations of being parents, there was barely any time to think about anything else.

He had told his kids about their uncle, but they didn't really know Eclipse. It was better that way.

And then one days, the twins slipped off to another universe. One where Silver and Shadow were children, cared for by a human. And Eclipse, also a child was there was well.

It was a shock to see him, especially a version that was so small.

Shadow couldn't help but be suspicious. What if this version of Eclipse was hiding something?

And then Shadow said something simple, just confirmed that this was his brother and the kid all but lit up like a puppy. His tail wagging, eyes shining.

How eager he was for a bit of his brother's love, it was so clear how much he wanted it.

Shadow couldn't help but pat the child on the head and saw plainly how deeply Eclipse loved that.

The night, after getting the twins to bed, Shadow lay up, thinking about his own brother. It had been a long long time since the two of them had seen each other. What was he doing, how had his life turned out?

Maybe it was time to see each other once again. See how Eclipse was doing. And maybe make up with him.

BROTHERS PLEASE

TALK TO EACH OTHER!!!! LOVE EACH OTHER!!!! PLEASE I BEG!!!!

-

Eclipse's dreams were full of pain. Voices yelling at him and when he couldn't figure out what they wanted it got louder, the shock collar that went off randomly, and worse, there was punishment. He couldn't escape it, couldn't reason with anyone, it just hurt, the pain getting worse and worse-

And then he was awake.

He wasn't back there, he was wrapped in blankets, in his new home. He was safe...?

Sitting up, he slowly put a hand on toward his neck. The collar wasn't there anyone, it was gone. It would never be back around his neck. There were only scars.

Eclipse trembled as echos of his dream played in his head.

He was safe, in Wade's house, with his brother. And Silver and Wade. But it was different for him.

The hedgehogs were Wade's sons. He was not. Wade was kind to him, never cruel, never yelled. But Eclipse was big and clumsy, a stranger only allowed in because of his ties to Shadow. If things had been different, he would would have been part of this family.

But was he truly?

Crawling out of his blankets, trembling, Eclipse moved silently down the hallway, peering around the door frame. Wade was sprawled out in bed, Silver curled up next to him.

The two of them looked warm and comfortable. Like how it used to be for him.

Eclipse would have given anything to join them. To be hugged, to receive comfort at a time to like, to be told he was safe, no matter what his mind was telling him. He needed that, he needed that in a time like this.

Except he didn't know if he was welcome. He was big and clumsy and different. Wade wasn't his father.

Wade wouldn't be cruel to him.... but what if he only tolerated him?

The one thing worse then the nightmares and the memories of what happened, was being rejected again. His spot in this place was already so fragile, he couldn't risk it any further.

Wade didn't mind him being here. But did Wade care about him? Love him like he did the hedgehogs?

Eclipse shivered out in the cold of the hallway, but he didn't dare go inside.

He could go to Shadow, but his twin was fast asleep. And he probably didn't want to be disturbed.

Eclipse was alone. Funny how he could be surrounded by people and still very much alone.

AMES

AMES WHEN I GET YOU AMES

WHEN I GET YOU

JUST YOU WAIT

JUST YOU WAIT AMES

-

The sun was going down and Eclipse was getting nervous.

He hated nighttime, nighttime meant nightmares, it meant visits from GUN in his dreams, going over old painful memories once again. He would thrash and cry out, trying to get away, but never could. He might have been free from them during the day, but they still owned his soul at night.

Eclipse wished he could just skip sleep altogether, but that was too difficult. His body required rest. And so, he suffered. He didn't want anyone else to know anyone else to worry about him. Wade was already so kind, already trying to help him out if someone yelled around him or spooked him.

And so Eclipse suffered in silence.

It was fine, with everything else going on, it wasn't that bad. There could be worse things.

But he still didn't enjoy it.

Eclipse watched and waited for the hedgehogs to go to bed and then Wade tucked him in. That was nice of the human. Sometimes, Eclipse would wake up and wanted comfort, but he wasn't sure if it was okay from Wade. He was still figuring this out.

And the only thing worse then a nightmare, was being told to go away in the middle of the night. The mere thought was so terrible, he hadn't tried it.

So he suffered in silence, even after Wade said goodnight, even though he wasn't asleep yet. Each day, he hoped that this night would be a peaceful one. And each night, his dreams were out to cause as much harm as they could, making him relive the worst moments of his life again and again.

That was the part he hated the most.

Then he heard Shadow calling for him and looked up.

Shadow was in his socks, standing in the doorway and looking at him, "do you want to stay in our room?'

Even after all this time, it was still a shock to see his twin so small. Eclipse remembered when they used to be the same size, running around, playing with each other. And their friend.... But now, he was huge and Shadow was small. So much had changed.

However he wanted that, wanted to be close by his brother. So he stood up, nodding and followed Shadow back.

The bedroom was small, comfortable. There were bunk beds and Shadow had the bottom one. "You can have my bed."

"But... what about you?"

The darker hedgehog only shrugged, "I'll be fine."

But it wasn't fine, this was his brother's room, his brother's bed. Eclipse couldn't just come in here and take over, push him out. That wasn't okay. "No, you stay too."

Frowning, Shadow asked, "with you?"

Eclipse nodded.

And then Silver leaned over the edge of his bed, "me too?"

There was a sigh, but Shadow nodded. And a few minutes later, the three of them were bundled up together on Shadow's bed. Silver had his plushie and Eclipse was snuggled up against his twin. It wasn't exactly like how it used to be, there was still someone missing. But it was almost as good.

For the first time in a long time, Eclipse felt warm and safe.

Even better, he was able to sleep peacefully through the night. No nightmares, no thrashing around.

He was safe.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMMMMMMMEEEEESSSSSSSSSS

AMES WTF

THIS IS SO??? WHOLESOME???