#always one

Small Heath was a small town, the sky darkened by clouds of smoke from the factories, a small estate where everyone knew everyone else's business,

The Shelby home sits quiet on Watery Lane, the once full of life house now silent as the three remaining women lay passed out after a celebratory night at the Garrison - along with the youngest Shelby man, the news everyone had been waiting for had finally arrived, the boys were coming home.

A loud banging on the door had Leah groaning as she squeezed her eyes shut pleading for whoever thought it was appropriate to almost kick down the door to do one. Huffing and puffing to herself she trudged her way to the door, shielding her eyes from the light she squinted as she opened the door.

"For fuck sake, what?" She grunted as her eyes landed on Lizzie Stark, a woman that she'd never gotten along with, you know, with Lizzie having a thing for Tommy for all these years and what not.

"The first trains are pulling in." Was the only words to leave her mouth before Leah had slammed the door in her face and ran back to the living room where Polly and Ada were currently passed out.

"Pol! Ada! Come on, up you get!" Leah yelled excitedly as she raced through the room pulling open the curtains and letting daylight in.

"What the fuckin' hell are you doing girl?!" Polly grumbled as she sat up holding her head, the celebratory drinks they'd been for last night making her pay.

"The trains are here." Was all Leah needed to say before all 3 were up and out the house.

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Standing at the station arm in arm with the Shelby ladies and Finn Leah couldn't help but bounce on her feet slightly as she watched every soldier like a hawk, waiting to see a glimpse of any of the three that she was waiting for.

"Arthur!" Ada's sudden yell made Leah jump before she turned and saw the man in question walking towards them.

After letting Polly, Ada and Finn say their hellos Leah stepped forwards, tears in her eyes as they met his. "Hello Arty." She grinned, giggling slightly as Arthur rolled her eyes before pulling her into his arms.

"Never thought I'd miss that." Arthur laughed as he squeezed Leah tight. "But no more." He deadpanned before a smile broke out on his face once more.

"What? No love for your best friend?" Made Leah spin around so fast she was surprised she'd managed to keep her footing.

"John!" She breathed a sigh of relief as she stepped away from Arthur and crashed into Johns arms, the tears falling as the pair stood rocking each other. "I'm so happy you're back." She whispered, other than Tommy, John was the Shelby that she was closest too, he was her best friend above all else.

"So am I, Le, so am I." He whispered pressing a kiss to the top of her head before he pulled back slightly. "You've still got one more." He spoke, nodding to behind her.

Turning her head she couldn't hold back the tears that started to fall as she locked eyes with her blue eyed soldier, stood next to Polly as he watched Leah.

"Tommy." She whispered, pulling away from John and racing towards Tommy with all that she had, jumping into his arms she wrapped her arms around his neck and held on for dear life, while his arms wrapped around her waist and pulled her as close as he possible could, the pair hiding their faces in each others necks as the tears flowed. "You came back." She whispered as she pulled away slightly, her hands gently cupping his cheeks as her thumb moved up and down over his jaw.

"Always." Tommy whispered, the first word he spoke to her after four long years. "Worried you weren't gunna be here." He muttered softly, his hard blue eyes watching her greens intently.

"I'll always be here for you Tommy, always." She whispered back, before pressing her lips to his in a long awaited kiss.

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Leah sighs as she tries to snuggle further into her pillow, the memories of the day the Shelby boys came back from France fresh in her mind, but now they were different, rather than catching her Tommy had let her fall, stepping away and walking off, away from her and straight into the arms of that Irish tart, her words ringing in Leah's ears.

"You can't hold him together forever."

A short sentence that tore a gaping whole through her chest, what did that even mean? She wasn't holding Tommy together, they were a team, they always had been since the day they both went after the same bully at school, Leah was a couple years younger than him, in the same year as his younger brother John, the two soon becoming good friends. After finding out that one of the boys from Tommy's year had pushed John to the ground they both had gone storming over to the group of boys, the one in question stood still as Tommy and the small girl approached with faces like thunder, and if you asked which one scared the poor boy more, the answer would surprise you.

The young girl walked ahead of 14 year old Tommy, her pigtails bopping side to side as she strode forwards swinging her fist straight into the bridge of his nose, barely flinching at the stream of blood that came flowing as she swiftly raised her foot and stomped on the boys foot before bringing her knee to his groin. Tommy stood there in stunned silence for a moment before he came back to his senses, making his own move, pulling Leah away from the wailing boy and swinging his fist into the boys stomach leaving him to drop to the ground as he hunched over himself.

Crouching down Tommy couldn't help but smirk as he reached into his pocket and pulled out a cigarette, one he'd stolen from his aunt earlier that morning, lighting it before leaning down into the bloody mess of his face.

"You ever touch my brother again, and I won't be pulling her away." He threatened, blowing the smoke from his cigarette into his face, a loud laugh escaping as a coughing fit caused the boy to groan in pain. "Come on, Pol's gunna go mad at the state of that." He grinned, nodding to the red swollen knuckles on the girls right hand.

"Yeah, well, nobody touches my best friend." She shrugged with an innocent smile but a devilish glint in her eyes, and Tommy knew, right then and there that this girl had him, and she had him good.

Leah remembered that day so vividly, she could still remember the anger she felt when she caught sight of John falling to the ground, the older boys stood laughing making her hands shake, she may have only been twelve but when you grow up with three older brothers you know how to fend for yourself, and that Leah did. She could still feel the pressure on her knuckles from when her hands met the boys nose, she could imagine the stickiness of the blood on her hands and the proud look on Tommy's face as they walked away, anxious of what Polly's response to yet another fight would be.

Leah was knocked out of her thoughts as Tommy started to fidget in bed next to her, his skin coated in a layer of sweat as he starts to twitch.

"Tom?" She whispered, sitting up in bed so she could see him better. "Tommy?" She tried again, her frown deepening as he did nothing but mumble, no trace that he'd heard her. "Tom." She said a bit louder, placing a hand on his shoulder before letting out a scream as he flew up and rolled over, laying his body on top of hers as his hands wrapped around her throat, a crazed look in his eye as he stared through the woman that he loved, his mind stuck in the mud trenches of France.

She clawed at his hands, dug her nails into his wrists as his grip got tighter, his weight pressing down onto her before all of a sudden the air was rushing back into her lungs, the pressure on her legs gone as she immediately brought them up toward herself, pushing up against the headboard as Tommy stood at the side of the bed staring at her with wide eyes.

A moments silence passed as Leah caught her breath, her shaking hands wiping under her eyes, she knew it was an accident, she knew he didn't mean it, but that didn't mean it scared her any less.

"Tom." She whispered hoarsely, watching as a switch flipped in his head and he was getting dressed, throwing his clothes on without giving her a second look. "Tommy please." She muttered, shuffling to the end of the bed, watching as he grabbed his cigarette case from the bedside drawers, lighting one up before securing the case in his inside pocket. "Where are you going?" She sighed, worry evident in her voice as her eyes followed his moves.

"I've got things to do." He muttered, stopping with his hand on the door knob, not making any move to turn and face the woman he'd claimed to always love.

"What things Tommy? It's half past 2 in the morning, come back to bed." She pleaded, knowing exactly where he'd end up if he walked through the door, her hopes starting to rise as he dropped his hand from the handle.

"I can't." He suddenly muttered, swinging the door open he tore from the house like a hurricane the door slamming behind him, with a sigh Leah stood up and took out one of the cigarettes from the spare case, she couldn't sleep without Tom, what she didn't know at the time, was that that night would be her last night by his side at all.

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The sun shining through the dingy window is what brought Leah back to the land of the living, having cried for hours she'd eventually passed out on the bed... Lifting her head slightly she sighed as the events from last night came rushing back to her, the slight sore feeling in her throat brought back the feeling of his hands around her neck, looking around she realised that Tommy had not returned to their shared bedroom, everything the way it had been left in the early hours of the morning.

Shaking her head Leah dragged herself out of bed and threw on the clothes that she had worn yesterday, lifting herself off the bed she grabbed the large bag stored in the wardrobe and stuffed the few possessions she owned inside before zipping it up, leaving it just inside the bedroom door before heading down to the family kitchen already dreading the conversations that were going to come next, the walls in the Shelby home were thin, there's no doubt that at least one person heard the raised voices. Muttering a good morning the young woman avoided the stares from the family as she made herself a cup of tea and took a seat between John and Finn.

"You look like shit." John was the first to talk after a brief silence, he'd heard the two in the middle of the night, not that he could make out what they were saying but he knew how his best friend sounded when she was upset, and upset she had been. "Ow! What was that for?" John cried out as Polly walked past landing a swift smack to the back of her nephews head.

"Shut up John." She muttered as she took a seat opposite Leah. "That looks sore." She said knowingly, her eyes lingering on the red/pink fingerprints that sat just to the side of Leah's throat quickly catching John's attention.

"It's nothing." Leah mumbled, shrugging her shoulders just as the front door opened with a gush of cold air, fitting really as Tommy walked through the door.

"What the fuck did you do?" John yelled instantly, standing from his chair he lent over the table pointing his finger at Tommy, Arthur quickly jumping up to make sure that he can grab John if he actually went for Tommy, not like he would, he remembered the outcome from when they were children.

"Shut the fuck up John." Tommy mumbled without looking at his younger brother as his eyes watched Leah, her head down, his eyes widened slightly as she lifted her head and his handy work from the night before came into view, not that he remembered what had happened, he remembered an argument and going to the garrison which is where he woke this morning. "What?" he squinted slightly, trying to get a better look, his face falling as he made out the shape of fingerprints and the memories came rushing back. "Leah, I-"

"Don't even bother Tom." She muttered, already knowing what road they were about to head down, again.

"I'm so-" "You're what? You're sorry?" She chuckled to herself. "Save it Tom, it's always the same old shit with you. I get it okay, I get that you saw some messed up shit while you were in France, I really do, and I know that you didn't mean to do it, but you just up and left!" She scowled at the man she loved, the man she loved so much that she would have willingly laid her life down for his, would have, if you had asked her yesterday.

"I know that, can we just go upstairs and talk about this." Tommy sighed, the hangover making itself known as the throbbing in his head started, getting louder and louder with every word, he didn't need this right now, especially not with his entire family watching.

"Why? So they don't hear what I've got to say? So they don't know that you almost killed me last night?" She laughed, a full belly laugh that had the likes of even Polly looking uncomfortable in her seat. "I'm sick of it Tom. I'm sick of being treated like shit, being treated like I don't even exist unless you need something, I'm sick and tired of pretending like everything is fine, like you don't leave me sat in the booth at the Garrison alone because you're too busy flirting with that pissing barmaid! Who, by the way, I wouldn't trust as far as I could throw the ugly bitch!" Leah screamed, the weeks of silent treatments, arguments and frustration finally taking their tole. "Oh yeah, don't think I haven't noticed how you look at Miss Blondy." She scoffed as Tommy's face dropped, the confusion on his face standing out plain as day.

"Because I'm not good enough for you!" Tommy bellowed, his voice making her jump slightly, he never yelled at her, in the 10 plus years they had known each other, not once had he raised his voice toward her like this. "I'm messed up Leah! I'm a broken man after that fucking war and I'll never be the same as I once was, that Tommy is dead, and I'm sorry about that I really am but that's just the way it is!" He all but screamed, the veins in his neck popping as he pointed down into her face, his heart breaking at the slither of fear that had appeared at his tone. "Leah, just, come on, enough is enough now aye." Tommy sighed as he pressed his palms into his eyes, he really needed to get some sleep. "Let's just go upstairs and-"

"No, Tom." She interrupted him once again, her patience running thin as she watched him clearly shrug her words off before he headed towards the stairs. "I'm done Tommy." She sighed, her shoulders sagging as she looked at him in utter defeat. "I'm done." She gave him a small smile before walking past him quickly, rushing up the stairs she grabbed her bag from behind the bedroom door and turned, walking past the shocked face of Tommy and the confused faces of his family.

"Leah, you don't have to do that, you can stay at mine with me." John was quick to talk, having watched her scream at his brother he knew that she was serious, she was done with Tommy, but that didn't mean she had to be done with him too, did it?

"I'm sorry Johnny, I'll write to you okay, make sure you take good care of them children, you hear me." She smiled sadly, a small tear running down her face that he was quick to wipe away. "I love you Johnny boy." She smiled sadly as she wrapped her arms around his waist, burrowing her head into his chest, inhaling his scent one last time.

"I love you too Lee-Lee." He sniffed slightly, wrapping his arms around the smaller girls shoulders.

"See ya, Lee." Arthur murmmered as she pulled away from John and faced the oldest Shelby sibling, the two of them smiling sadly at each other as Arthur stepped forwards pulling the girl into a tight hug. "Bye Arty." She giggled as he scoffed. "How many fucking times have I told you, aye? Makes me sound like an old man." He chuckled softly as he pulled back, keeping his hands on Leah's shoulders. "Together or not, you'll always be me sister, alright? Anybody tries to fuck with you, you're Leah Shelby, got it?" He told her sternly, no hint of a smile until the young girl nodded her head, words failing her.

"Thank you Arthur." She smiled before turning to the two youngest, Ada had been the sister that Leah had always wanted, and vice versa, the two girls had become inseperable while the men were away in France, sticking as two peas in a pod even when they had returned.

"Don't go." Ada whispered as she wrapped her arms around Leah's neck, even though she was a few years older than Ada they were the same size, Leah not having grown since she was about 16 years old.

"I'm sorry Ades." She muttered, her heart shattering in her chest as she held the young girl to her chest, her dress dampening due to the girls tears. "Hey, hey, we'll be fine, you hear me? I will write as soon a I can, sisters for life, right?" she whispered, pulling away and wrapping her pinky around Ada's something they used to do when times got hard during the war.

"Sister's for life." Ada smiled, heading over to Pol as Finn tugged on the end of my dress.

Little six year old Finn, he didn't have a clue what was going on as he looked from the upset faces of his family, to the cold, distant look that sat on his older brother's face, Tommy stood watching from the bottom of the stairs, his eyes cold and calculating, as though the love of his live wasn't about to walk through the door and disappear. But that's what he had to do, he had to act as though he didn't care, she was finally leaving, leaving the danger that was him and his family, the dingy, dangerous streets of Small Heath, she'd be better away from it all, she'd be safe.

"Where are you going?" The small boy asked, his small eyes full of tears as he struggled to understand, Leah had been here for as long as he could remember, she can't just be leaving, right?

"I'm going to get away for a while, okay?" Leah started, crouching down and giggling slightly as he threw himself into her arms, wrapping his arms around her neck as tight as he possibly could.

"You're coming back though, right?" His small voice was muffled against her hair, his question kicking her in the gut and she choked back a sob.

"Of course, I promise and what do I say about promises?" She tried to sound happy, ignoring her voice breaking and the tears that were threatening to fall at any second, and she had prided herself in making it this far with only a few escaping.

"If you break a promise I'll break your legs." The young boy giggled as he pulled back and placed a big sloppy kiss on her cheek.

"That's right." She laughed slightly, looking up to try and stop the tears from falling, but she couldn't, wrapping her arms around the small boy she held him close to her chest as the tears dripped from her chin. "So." She started before she cleared her throught. "So, if I don't come back, you have full permission to break my legs, okay." She laughed, wiping her tears away as the small boy nodded his head before being picked up by Arthur.

"Pol..." She breathed out as the head of the family was suddenly standing before her, her face as stern as it had always been in the years she'd known the older woman, the woman who had been more like a mother to her than her real one had every been. For every scrape, break and tear that Leah had experienced Polly was always there to make it better.

"I know, love, I know." She muttered, of course she did, Polly knew everything, ask anyone. "You are going to leave. You are going to get yourself together and you are going to come back, whether it's for him or not, this is not the last time we are going to see you. Do you understand?" She spoke confidently, the only thing that would let you believe that she was feeling some kind of sad were her eyes, the one's that Leah knew so well.

"Yes Polly." Leah muttered, giving Polly a hug she breathed in the scent of home one last time before she pulled away, picking her bag up she made her way to the front door, pulling it open she gulped as the Small Heath air hit her face, turning one lest time she made eye contact with Tommy, her Tommy, or what was her Tommy, but like he had said, the old Tommy is dead.

"Goodbye Thomas." She muttered sadly as a lone tear slid down her cheek, shaking her head she stepped outside softly closing the door behind her.

As the soft thud sounded throught the Shleby home all eyes turned towards Tommy who was stood watching the door, almost as though he was hoping that she would walk back through, tell him that she was just proving a point but she wasn't really going anywhere, but there was nothing, nothing but silence and the disgusted looks from his family.

"Well done Tom." John scowled, his eyes narrowed towards his older brother as his hand clenched into a fist.

"Fuck off John." Tom muttered before walking up the stairs and shutting himself away in their - his room, taking out his pipe he sighed as the smoke glided down into his lungs, laying back on the bed he couldn't help the few tears that escaped.

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First part done! I do have 5/6 other parts ready to go! Let me know what you think!