#always losing

He backs me into a wall I try not to move at all Hold my breath (my stomach’s churning) There’s a slap; my face is burning

I am still, my throat is bared (My heart’s beating fast, I’m scared) He is pointing at me, “Mister, You’ll go out and find your sister”

And like any altercation It ends with humiliation: “Ain’t that right?” His voice is rough (confirming once won’t be enough)

“Yes sir”, I say, filled with fear He leans closer, taps his ear “Sorry, son, I couldn’t hear you” “Yes sir!” (I don’t want to fear you)

He leaves, and I breathe again (Do not cry, ignore the pain) Slaps and punches, shoves and kicks Nothing like that ever sticks

But for it to hurt inside He knows to attack my pride: Makes me sorry for my crime Makes me say it one more time

(It’s enough to make me cry Make me wish that I would die Helplessness is in my soul; there’s nothing I can control)

***

Later on, I’m on the floor Lost again (who’s keeping score?) There’s a bat in Max’s hands And a loud crack when it lands

I have scared her; she’ll repay it “Say you understand! Just say it!” I croak out “I understand” But that’s not all she has planned:

“What?!” she yells (don’t make me do it) (Twice today, I won’t live through it) I am punished, most sublime As I say it one more time

These trolls actually think they're getting "a bua and an engagement debunk" the day after the Met Gala, when what's actually coming down the track for them is Zoe supporting her man on the first night of his tour ...