#alicesasks

i think it’s basically as simple as noticing the little moments when you feel content, registering what you’re doing at that time and then doing it more

however i’m not one for writing a simple answer when i could write an essay so here we go

+ i used to post “three good things” every day on my personal blog and getting in that habit really helped me change my outlook. even when i’d had an utterly shit time i had to dredge something good up from the day in order to keep up my streak of posting three good things, and it helps you effectively “discard” the bad things. it could’ve been something really small like a nice sandwich or clean bedsheets; it doesn’t matter as long as you think of something.

+ i think part of it is getting rid of the notion that every minute of every day needs to be productive; the little things i enjoy are sewing, listening to audiobooks, baking, studying maps, listening to podcasts, watching netflix, and it’d be so easy to feel guilty about the minutes i spend doing those things instead of housework or job applications etc, but it’s so so important to keep that time in your day

+ likewise, stop tying food with guilt! gosh! adult life kind of sucks and you need to be able to fully savour the little pieces of chocolate and biscuits and warm bread you eat along the way without feeling bad about it

+ i think working on being a more “forgive and forget” type person helps because you can’t let grudges and annoyances ruin the little joys in your life. if you’re feeling worked up but the other person hasn’t done anything major or something they need to apologise for, extract yourself for a second to cool down and move on so you’re not just thinking of it for the rest of the day

+ maybe work on replacing the time you spend mindlessly scrolling social media with something that’s more hands on and tactile, that gets your brain in gear, and that you genuinely get joy from. i find social media to be more force of habit than genuine enjoyment, so i try to take breaks where i don't look for a few days and instead do some of the stuff i mentioned before

+ get outside! if you’re feeling like everything’s rubbish and you’re not sure why, it might be because it’s been ages since you had fresh air. you don’t need to go climb a mountain or run a marathon but try visit somewhere where you can see the sky and some scenery and just take it in.

2 - what’s your feel good movie

they literally haven’t changed since i was about 17 lmao but #1 is pride. i downloaded it on my ipod classic and i must’ve watched it about 11 times just on there on nights when i couldn’t sleep

4 - what flower would you like to be given

i adore sunflowers !! but honestly any, i’ve only been given flowers 3 times in my life so am not past the stage where i find it utterly thrilling

10 - what’s something you’re excited for

next weekend i’m going back home to do this thing where a pottery painting cafe delivers a blank pot to your house, you paint it then they collect it and bring it back when it’s glazed. like is that not the best thing you’ve ever heard of !!

15 - for every emoji you get, tag someone and describe them in a word

@saintjudes light @dakotajohnsongf wit @xowaltz taste

27 - which character would you want to be?

thank you so much for letting us know, i’ve no idea how long this has been going on but i’ve never spotted it before

turns out there’s just a load of links that have been misspelled with one letter wrong, which sends you to a dodgy domain!

it might take a while, but we’ll sort them out

hi love, i’m so sorry to hear that that happened to you ♡

honestly i don’t think there’s a way of knowing for sure what lies ahead. all you can be sure about is the fact you like them (rather than thinking “hmm i wonder if these feelings i have are platonic or romantic i can’t figure it out”) and spending time with them makes you happy - if so then that’s a sign you can pursue something, even if you take it slow. if they’re nice enough, they’ll be happy to take baby steps with you as you get to know and trust them.

if you suggest going for a coffee or something as a date, that doesn’t have to be a definitive move that there’s no going back from - if it’s awkward or just doesn’t work out, you could just go back to being friends! look at it as just getting together, and then each time afterwards asking yourself whether you had fun and whether you want to do it again. don’t look at it as a choice now between a relationship or nothing, because that’s a scary and big decision to make.

i don’t think there’s a way of knowing someone’s true character at this stage. i don’t want you to think there are signs to look out for, because i don’t want you to feel like there were signs that you missed in your previous relationship - i don’t want you to put that blame or pressure on yourself. even if there were signs, it would never be your fault. you deserve to be able to go into every relationship with faith and trust in their character, and if they prove you wrong it’s on them.

omg !!! yes !!! this is super encouraging and just all round adorable. i’m SO happy that you’re getting that “who is she” moment in the mirror bc we all deserve it at least sometimes

also, the morning when i read this, i’d just woken up from a dream where my cousin married a girl we’d never met before, and all the family were really standoffish and turned up at the wedding thinking we wouldn’t like her, but she had the coolest blonde pixie cut and i sprinted up to her and was like “Oh my god!!! i love your hair! you must be cool to pull that hair off so we’re best mates already congrats on the wedding” and we hugged

so it’s almost (not to be creepy) like u were in my dreams .... sort of

omg martina ❣️💞💝💖💕 this makes me so happy first of all that you read it and second that you liked the edit (and third that you thought to message)!!! thank u so much, what did you think of the book?? it's one of my absolute faves