#alexsi

'Alright, are you ready?'

'Don't be stupid, of course I'm not.'

Darrin and Saires stared at each other in silence for a minute, then the brother of the bride decided it was time to intervene. 'Is not exactly complicated. What is bothering you? You have nearly everything done already.'

'I know, just... Go over it one more time, Alexsi. I'm still a little hungover - in Sterran's name, what was *in* those drinks, anyway?'

'Ynusha is right, you *are* sissy water-drinker,' said Alexsi dispassionately. 'Don't worry about vodka, it will put hairs on your chest. Now. I go and sit with family, you go into hall. Tell me how you go into hall.'

Saires took a deep breath. He remembered this part, at least. There'd been a rehearsal, and then another when he'd messed up the part that wasn't like a Myravese ceremony, and another rehearsal after that to make sure he'd got it right. 'I go and stand at the left door of the hall, Darrin will be on my left, with the rock. We wait to be summoned by the priestess, and when we are, we walk to the centre.'

'Don't rush this time!' said Darrin. 'Remember it looks bad if you get there before Ynusha, even I can tell that.'

'Yes, yes, I'm *aware*...'

'Bicker after honeymoon,' said Alexsi, grinning widely and looking unfeasably impish despite the formal robes of his house. 'Now, priestess gives speech, and you are exchanging rocks. What rock?'

'A brick.'

Alexsi raised an almost invisible eyebrow. 'A brick?'

'Part of a limestone brick. It was going to be a necklace of polished quartz beads, but then I thought, well...' Saires trailed off.

'Go on, I am most interested in hearing what you thought.'

Saires glared at him. 'It's not just any brick, Alexsi, I took a portal back to Myravene and blasted part of the battlements off my father's castle.'

'Are you *insane*?' said Darrin. 'You could have been *killed*!'

'Yes, I know. It was worth it.'

Alexsi gave Saires a long look, and then shrugged. 'Fine. I don't know whether I am disturbed or impressed, but fine. Next, promises. This part has been adapted to include Sterran, you should have no trouble with vowing, right?'

Saires swallowed. 'I hope not. I've been rehearsing it for weeks.'

'Good. And then all come into garden to plant trees. Is your tree as dramatic as your rock?'

'Oh, gods, no, it's a male Myravene cherry. But it's an import.'

'I helped him find it,' said Darrin. 'You would not believe how expensive it was.'

'I work in biggest library on continent, of course I believe,' replied Alexsi. 'So what is reason for spending all that money?'

'Oh, that's easy,' said Saires. 'It's a long way from home and useless without the female.'