#albert loud

No Bus, No Fuss: We open with LIncoln arriving late for the bus, and Lynn not riding it because tracks starting and she has to get her workout in.. and because the writers need her not to be on the bus for this plot to work at all. It’s not a terrible way to write her out, she does do all the sports.. beacause apparently like Captain America she can do all the sports without having to train her body for each specific one because she’s in peak condition.  Though I do dock a few points from the episode for not having her run past it while saying on your left. 

But yeah as for why it couldn’t Lincoln takes a seat in the back not realizing it’s bat country.. and also home to a gang of 8th grade bullies. Which.. yeah assholes do tend to flock to where there’s the most plausable deniablity top notch show. Though I tended to pick the back in high school more just because it was freaking comfy but hey, who says goons can’t enjoy comfort. They can’t however let this slide, not helped by Lincoln accidently spilling soda on him or his friends trying to help. Look Clyde you mean well but they just want a reason to beat him into a coma, and you basically just offered to join him.  So unupsirisngly when the Lincrew exit the bus their all in pretty bad shape. Including stella....

Though in the bullies defense at least their equal opportunity jagoofs. One of them is a girl and they bullied stella just as mucha s the males. Dosen’t make them any less of a jungle gym full of tools but I can give them credit for not being sexist asshats just regular asshats. At their age that’s a hard bar to clear. Though LIncoln, Clyde and Stella all got off better than LIam, who got his undies pulled over his head, a bullying standard and rusty and Zach who. .had their underwear tied together in a not. 

Oh.. oh it gets worse. When we cut to them after school.. Rusty says the fire department had to cut them loose and Zach and I quote says “I saw too much of rusty.. and his birth mark”

I.. I do not want to think about what that entails.. both because Rusty’s 12 and i’m not a pedophile and because he’s rusty. I just.. why show.. why would you try and make me THINK about that. How is Zach being scarred for life funny? 

All valid questions. But moving right along past that waking nightmare, LIncoln assures them they had to have cooled off... spoilers they have not and our heroes all exit the bus at lincolns because they tied their underwear together.  Yes all of them and yes including stella. 

They naturally don’t want to go back and Lincoln has the idea of just having the parents drive them, one a day. Stella has to take hers off the table since her parents leave early in the morning: Her mom goes into work early and her dad has hot yoga. Which is a disapointment as I genuinely want to know about Stella’s parents and hope we actually get to see them at some point and finding out one of them works really early and the other does yoga every day, and hot yoga at that which if your wondering what that is, and when I first heard the term I was, it’s doing yoga but in an extremley humid and exhausting environment. It is sadly not learning to do this, as i’d hoped

Someday.. someday. But that still leaves a parent a piece so as you probably expect the bulk of the episode is “Parent drives them but is terrible about it” And honestly.. it’s not the series best stuff with most of these not being very funny. Most of them.  Zach’s Parents: Zach’s parents go by mighty morphin power rangers logic.. i.e. the parents look and act pretty much exactly like their kids. So the Gurdles are also discount dale gribbles who stalk a man in their van while the kids wait for death but death won’t come.. and as seen up top all are as fed up with Zach as I am. Again Rusty is growing on me, I still make fun of him because why wouldn’t I, but he at least serves a function in the group.  As i’ve mentioned before: Lincoln’s the leader and one of the main characters, Clyde is also a main charater and has been fairly fleshed out at this point, Stella is awesome and provides the brains and some pep, LIam is also optimsitic but provides farm jokes and muscle, and Rusty is the group asshole every gorup needs. Zach.. is the more sarcastic and cynical one but with Lynn now going to the same schoool.. why isn’t she in that roll? Have her date LIam, since I love that pairing since last week, and have her take Zach’s place since she plays the lancer role to lincoln better anyway. Zach just dosen’t do it well and comes off like a whiny baby and when he’s not in sarcasm mode he’s going off abotu aliens again, like a discount dale gribble. And look most viewers probably haven’t seen the genuine article which.. first off allow me

And second off dosen’t mean you can slack off as i’ve seen better paranoid nutjobs with that gimmick, like Stan Pines or Andromeda. You, can, do, better. So either do it or get rid of Zach already. 

Liam’s Parents: His meemaw takes them riding in her tractor, leanall in her bladder, cheated on her baby you can go and ask her. A pig vomits on Clyde because GET IT LIAM’S A HICK GET IT GET IT. 

Now THAT my friends is a hick. 

Rusty’s Dad: So yeah I was not looking forward to meeting the stygian void Rusty popped out of but turns out his dad is apparently single. Which dosen’t suprise me, he’s rusty’s dad and both looks and  is voiced by Richard Steven Horvitz, which will never not be awesome and is not only perfect casting, as he plays dorks well, but also wonderful to see him in a modern production. I mean granted the zim movie was a modern production, but that was reviving a character he played a few decades ago. 

And while Rusty’s dad apparently showed up before, in an episode I SAW no less “Back Out There” so unlike some lapses in my Loud House Knowledge I have no excuse here, it was still intresting to get an explination for why Rusty’s like this. His dad is a salesman, who practically bathes in colonge, tells the same story and stops on the street to shill to people while driving his son to school, something his son helps with. And probably Rocky just rolls his eyes at. I miss rocky.  And suprisingly given I hated his son pretty quickly.. I love this guy. He’s pretty endearing: Sure he’s a schmooze factory.. but he kept the kids in the divorce meaning his wife either abndoned him, or he fought hard for htem and does seem to genuinely love his kid and have a great rapport with him. I mean it helps I have a soft spot for Schyster characters, especially Stan PInes, but I just like the guy. The fact he has a vetran voice actor whose great at this sorta roll probably helps but still, he’s just wonderful and actually makes me like Rusty better, and I was already warming up to the kid, phrasing, as it explains why he’s such a douche: his dad pumps him full of self esteem, probably well meaningly and is a grown up rusty.. which is a better application of power rangers logic as instead of groaning at Zach’s angtics, this gives an explnation for why Rusty’s like this. So yeah only one of the segments I really laughed at. 

Clyde’s Dads: Since we’ve met the boys before, it’s just a saftey based gag as they wrap the car in bubblerwap. 

Rita: Finally we get to Rita, who simply is a bit agressive getting parking.. btu she’s a mother of 11 and has had to deal with school parking for years and doing so for several children. So fair enough. She does cut off Lincoln’s asshole of a teacher who cuts him off in line in retrubution and then tells him “Tell your mom I said high”.. in a tone that implies he’s going to be hanging outside their house at 3 in the morning with a bat starring menacingly. Yeah not a big fan of Mr. Bohlmer anymore as he’s just your basic mean teacher sterotype.  So Lincoln cooks up another way, taking a plane. So we get flip back! 

What can I say he’s grown on me. And he’s hilarious here, taking the kids in a rusty plane that’s “No longer under federal investigation”, which is a SELLING POINT, has no refunds nd naturally the seatbelts are shoddy and he ejects them via trap door. I loved it. 

But our heros dont and now trapped in the trees Rusty and Zach bicker with one another which.. fellas I know a way to settle this. KAL-IF-FEE!

No matter who looses thier friends win. But they instead accept they have to ride the bus and face the bullies. But they also find when getting ready OHTER kids were bullied and the three cablebastards just take turns. But Lincoln has a plan to fix that and just.. outright stands up to them.. with the entire bus backing them. And honestly.. it’s not a bad message about bullying. Generally bullies won’t backed down when confronted all the time.. but when outmatched they will.. still not the best message but still far better than season 1′s “If a girl bullies you she secrety has a crush on you”. I.. will have to deal with those episodes someday but today is not that day. So our heroes celebrate and rusty does grow an inch, proving him right. Phrasing! Final Thoughts on NBNF:  This one was decent... it had a few dead spots, Zach’s parents are about as intresting as he is and given all the batshit and legitly dangerous conspiracy theories and theorists that came out of of the woodwork and were backed by the trump presdency, that bit plays even worse than it would normally and the stuff with Clyde’s dad’s has been done before.. and honestly is something they need to retire. The husbands have a better dynamic than this, let them use it. It was also a disapointment we dind’t get to see Stella’s family, especially since again the mcbride’s schitck is REALLY overplayed and it would’ve been nice ot get some fresh blood in there and we really didn’t need to see Zachs.  All those problems aside though this is a pretty standard plot with an okay ending, but some good gags along the way. Not Loud HOuse’s best and especially in a bad spot considering the last episode before this “Saved by the SPell” was not only way funnier but also used the lincrew better. Still can’t say i’ts bad just.. okay. Also I apparently like rusty as a character now....

Resident Upheaval:  This one was also just...okay. Not terrible, and it has an actually intresting premise, but it doesn’t do much with it. 

Our setup simple: Pop Pop’s girlfriend Myrtle wants to move into the same retirement home as his, explaining away her apparently living there by her just visting a lot. Sure why not. So Lincoln assures him he’s going to get her in, he’s the man with the plan. 

Before we get to what the problem with that is.. gotta talk about the elephant in the room since Pop Pop is pretty absent for the rest of the episode.. and that’s that .. their STILL using him. As some of you probably know, and if you don’t your about to, Pop Pop’s voice actor Fred Willard, comedy legend and really sweet guy, passed away. So you can imagine how WRONG it feels to have not only another voice coming out of one of his characters but one that just dosen’t match. And I don’t blame Chris Swindle here, he was given a pretty unfair task of pinch hitting for someone who just fucking died, and likely because the episode was too far into production to scrap. I’m certainly hoping so because honestly.. I genuinely DON’T see why Pop Pop can’t just die with Fred. And look i’m not against replacing an actor when the worst happens: Russi Taylor’s roles all had to be replaced after her unfortunate passing, it’s not something i’m against normally... but the combination of pop pop being an older character they can write out and the fact they HAD AN ENITRE EPISODE ABOUT ACCEPTING HE WOULDNT’ LAST FOREVER, means that one comes off a bit hollow if you keep dragging him around. You’d get a good episode out of it, and this episode sets it up so that Myrtle has plenty of potetiail to stick around. 

 Anyway Lincoln’s problem is the OTHER applicant is Clyde’s Nana Gayle.. whose actually come up a few times before, some i’ve seen some I haven’t, a continuity nod i’m happy their following up on. They even explain why sh’es just appearing in person now as Clyde, when later snapping at lincoln, exclaims “You knew my dad’s have been trying to get her to move closer for a while now!” She’s Harold’s mom and a sweetheart.  So our heroes procede to try and bribe the board, both working at it but both end up finding each other at the opera. And this.. COULD have been intresting, putting the two best friends against each other for one thing neither can both have, and both have stake in it: Myrtle is as good as grandma to Lincoln by this point and Nana Gayle is VERY close to clyde, so this isn’t great. But since the guys they’ve been bribing arne’t the end authority, they have to go to who is: SCOOTS!

As you can tell I love this old hellraiser.. and the fact she’s STILL seeing her younger boyfriend from “The Boss Maybe”. YOu get it scoots you get it. Naturally Scoots wants to see some blood, so she’s pitting both women against each other. Though neither grandma wants to do this so LIncoln and Clyde do the logical thing.. and dress up like each othe’rs grandmas, do the competition and get found out. Scoots disqulaifies both, the boys realize they were stupid and they go to apologize.

They instead find an easy solution to their problem!: Turns out Scoots as head had been hiding a double room behind a fake wall, to store both her scooters and her boyfriends motorcycle, so naturally now both grannies can move in as roomies while Scoot will just have to back her boyfriends hog into the single.. and I guess his motorbike too. The two grandmothers are instant friends, remdinng the boys fo each other and it’s.. really precious. Looks like I have yet another spinoff for the pile.