4. do you like your name? is there another name you think would fit you better?

I like my mother’s maiden name and I think it sounds better than my last name

I always like to think that if I publish any of my writing I’ll use it

8. what musical artists have you most felt connected to over your lifetime?

I grew up on a lot of beatles and fleetwood mac so there’s them and then the national and the antlers and gregory and the hawk if we’re talking the artist as a whole

15. five most influential books over your lifetime.

a series of unfortunate events

hp

why can I not think of books

everything is illuminated

16. if you’d grown up in a different environment, do you think you’d have turned out the same?

For most of my life I’ve seen upbringing as more nurture than nature, but I don’t really think that’s true anymore. I think that no matter what influences people go through they have a basis that can’t really be escaped. If I look back into past experiences and think “if this had gone differently would things really be different” I don’t really think that the person who I am would be much different. Sure I’ve met people and gone through things that have taught me lessons but there’s still this inherent part of me that can’t really be removed

18. what’s your patronus?

an owl

24. have you ever felt like you had a “mind-meld” with someone?

so I couldn’t really find a coherent definition for this so I’m defining it as feeling like someone completely understands who you are like your mannerisms and thought processes (maybe i’m way off but idc)

I’ve probably come closest to this with sarah. like she can tell what i’m feeling and what i’m going to do before i can figure it out

29. three songs that you connect with right now.

song for zula- phosphorescent

hounds- the antlers

wild horses- the rolling stones

30. pick one of your favorite quotes.

I’m going to go with my senior quote which is a walt whitman:

“Do I contradict myself?Very well then I contradict myself, (I am large, I contain multitudes.)

You are absolutely right, actually.  Some of it is abusive.  I was talking with another twilight blog about this one scene in the first book where Edward follows Bella to Port Angeles and is pretty much stalking her 24/7.  I don’t think Stephenie Meyer was going for this “creepy, obsessed, vampire stalker” thing when she wrote it and she has actually talked about how their relationship is the “true love” you see in fairytales.  It’s supernatural, obviously, so some of the things that people are screaming ‘ABUSIVE’ about are kind of unavoidable when you’re dating a vampire.  In the last book when Edward and Bella sleep with each other for the first time, Bella wakes up with bruises on her arms.  What makes it different is that he’s a vampire with super strength and that he actually apologizes and refuses to actually have sex with her again until she’s changed herself.

But there are a ton of things where it was very possessive and weird.  Like with the Port Angeles incident, Meyer could have written it as Edward feeling a “pull” towards Bella (not knowing that he’s being attracted to her) and ends up in Port Angeles to see Bella was there and about to get hurt.  That would have gone better along the lines of what Meyer was going for when writing their relationship.

But the one thing I did not like was how Bella was so quick to fall back into Edward’s arms.  Don’t you think she would have had some trust issues after he left her in the middle of the woods where she got herself lost?  She never seemed to actually get over him, which was just really off and unrealistic.  Either way, Bella couldn’t have really ever gotten over Edward or there wouldn’t have been a story.  Stephenie Meyer had written Twilight and then its sequel Forever Dawn, which skipped the events of New Moon and Eclipse and was very similar to Breaking Dawn.  So I guess one of the main reasons everything is so loopy in this book series is because SM needed her Forever Dawn to take place.

alone together

8. Favorite animal/pet

Owls

13. Siblings

I have a sister

16. The last book you read

I’m currently rereading A Series of Unfortunate Events and I finished Austere Academy today

17. The last text message you sent/received

“Um” from Micah

23. Who is your best friend and how did you meet

Micah and I met her on tumblr (yeah i know)

36. What would you tell your younger self

“You will probably always feel like you can’t relate with the people around you. That’s okay. As long as you know yourself, that’s all that really counts for anything. Your life isn’t the way you want it to be, but someday, someday, someday this unsatisfactory world may align with the way you always hoped it would.”

41. Who would you want to meet again in your life

There are so many friends who I let fall by the wayside one way or another, so I suppose I’d like to “re-meet” them and try to do things better? I think I’ve become a different person (as fucking cliche as that sounds) and I’d like to re-do a lot of it while being more genuine.

50. Who would you save- yourself or a stranger?

This is such a flawed question-- does it mean to save them from a life-threatening situation? Save them from themselves? Clearly for the first interpretation it would be both, but they aren’t quite comparable. First, what kind of person wouldn’t save someone from being hurt? Second, I don’t think I’m self-destructive to the point where I would just let myself get in harm’s way for being indifferent on the outcome. 

For the second interpretation, there’s no such thing as saving a person from themselves and their own dysfunctions, only they can do that. Besides, I wouldn’t really concern myself with the troubles of a stranger in the first place. As for myself, I think most of my actions over the past year (although not always well-executed) have been to at least try to make myself better and “save” myself from... myself? In the sense of fighting the person I used to be and the path that I set myself on, trying to move on despite my past selves.

58. How do you fall asleep

I mostly let my mind go blank, most often accompanied by sad tunes

59. When was the last time you smiled and the last time you cried

Smiled- probably one of the last times I saw Lindsey. They’re pretty much the only person who really gets what I’m about, and whenever I get to see them I don’t feel like I have to justify myself or prove anything. (shoutout to you plant-let)

1: A song you like with a color in the title

Green Gloves- The National

3: A song that reminds you of summertime

Postcards from Italy- Beirut

4: A song that reminds you of someone you would rather forget about

Pink Rabbits- The National

5: A song that needs to be played LOUD

It’s Never Over (Hey Orpheus)- Arcade Fire

7: A song to drive to

Speak in Rounds- Grizzly Bear

11: A song that you never get tired of

Casimir Pulaski Day- Sufjan Stevens

12: A song from your preteen years

1940- The Submarines

20: A song that has many meanings to you

Send Me On My Way- Rusted Root

27: A song that breaks your heart

now how do you feel about lemonade mouth…

I mean I do love how Lela was the star but I don’t like Brady and Mack never meeting until the dance?? Like why couldn’t we have both?? And that throws away the whole first movie kind of since they never had that… unless they will eventually? #TB3?

i mean you could kinda look at it like brady and mack’s relationship was screwed - that they were convinced it was only a summer thing and it was never going to work in the long term - but by changing history/the film, lela (and tanner, but mostly lela lol) “fixed” their relationship (by giving them a new start), just as promised?

although this probably wasn’t intentional due to the big romantic duet right before the end - i guess it would be hella depressing if they did decide they “didn’t work” and broke up, but it means the film would have ended on a much higher note as they get a second chance?

there are hints that the original verse still happened, bc lela winks at mack/gives her the jacket, and in general it just seems like mack and brady connected so fast bc they already knew each other

I DONT LIKE……HOW MUCH WAS RETCONNED……….