Like I promised, I want to talk about ships with villains (villain × villain or villain × hero) that I headcanon in violent and/or abusive ways.
This doesn’t mean it’s the only "correct" interpretations, or that anyone has to agree with me. It also doesn’t mean I can’t enjoy wholesome, funny, or fluffy takes on these ships, I absolutely can. But usually, when I start thinking about them in canon (or canon-adjacent) contexts, my brain goes in this direction.
Obviously this isn’t every single ship ever, just the ones I could remember in one go and actually felt like musing about.
Nnoitra × Szayelaporro (Bleach): Both of them are freaky sadists, so imagining anything even close to a healthy dynamic is very difficult. That said, I don’t HC them as hating each other either, it’s more of a "toxic comrades/allies with benefits" thing. Or: "I don’t hate you/ I don't hate you too" situation, lol. But that doesn’t mean they’d ever be normal about it… or that Szayel wouldn’t decide to dissect Nnoitra right after sex.
Nnoitra × Nelliel (Bleach): Pretty much the same, except Nell isn’t a sadist. But again, their canon relationship makes it really hard to imagine anything beyond enemies with benefits/hatesex. With Nnoitra crying afterward because she refuses to behead him.
Nnoitra × Tesla (Bleach): Yeah, this guy again… okay, this is the last one with Nnoitra. Honestly, I’m not a huge fan of this ship. Tesla was too good for him, and I don’t think he actually enjoyed serving Nnoitra. He never liked hurting others, he didn’t even understand Nnoitra’s obsession with wanting to destroy Nell, but he obeyed him anyway. But I can’t deny Tesla was down bad for him, and it’s hard to ignore that kind of loyalty and devotion, even if in my opinion, Nnoitra didn’t deserve it.
Aizen × Ulquiorra (Bleach): Not physically violent, I just can’t see Aizen treating his favorite Arrancar like that (yes, Ulquiorra was absolutely his fave, you can’t convince me otherwise). But emotionally it is unhealthy and doomed from the start. The megalomaniac who wants to overthrow god × the living embodiment of nihilism. Their dynamic is so intriguing, and beautifully toxic in its own way.
Aizen x Starrk (Bleach): also not physically violent. I imagine at first Aizen was really excited to meet someone as strong as Starrk, someone not only worthy of becoming his Primera Espada, but also someone who might understand his own struggles. How it is being so powerful, yet so lonely? But Aizen is Aizen, and in time he grew disappointed, realizing that all Starrk truly wanted was to connect with others, that he didn’t enjoy fighting or dominating. Meanwhile, Starrk was torn between his new duties, his gratitude toward Aizen, and his own disdain for violence. It’s kind of like: "I’m attracted to you, I enjoy your company, but why did you have to turn out so different from what I imagined?". On both sides.
Again, doomed to fail, unless Aizen went to therapy, which is… unlikely.
Grimmjow × Ulquiorra (Bleach): This one’s complicated and isn’t as extreme as the previous ships. I like to imagine that post-canon AU GrimmUlqui could turn into a somewhat tame relationship, after Ulquiorra finally accepts that it’s okay to bond with others and even cherish those connections. But at the beginning, they’re a totall mess. Since I also ship Ulqui with Aizen, that gives us jealous Grimmjow, who seething because Aizen stole the batboy (and just for being a smug dick). At the same time, he’s judging Ulquiorra for being Aizen’s obedient little lapdog… while still totally lusting after him. Naturally, all of this makes Grimmjow very, very, very angry.
Kokushibo x Muzan (Demon Slayer): I’d say their dynamic was more like a respectful partnership, and I think it’s even canon that Muzan considered Kokushibo as his business partner. They also coexisted for hundreds of years before the Twelve Kizuki were even formed. But at the same time, they were both too fucked up in their own ways. Muzan with his obsession with becoming a perfect, immortal being, and Koku with his brother issues. I can imagine them bonding over certain things to some extent, but never actually helping each other overcome their deepest traumas. It’s like they were each just marinating in their own heads, never really letting the other in.
Dio x Vanilla Ice (JJBA): Another master/servant ship, my weakness, but also so power-imbalanced. Vanilla worships Dio like he’s literally a god incarnate, ready to cut his own head off the second Dio even hints at it. I love their dynamic as it is, but realistically, while Dio was capable of appreciating his servants to some degree (especially ones as useful, hot, and obedient as Vanilla), he never felt much grief about replacing them if they failed
Tserriednich x Theta (Hunter x Hunter): This is awful, he’s awful, and Theta doesn’t deserve any of it, please, someone get her out. But this dynamic is also absolutely fascinating, and I adore every second of it. I love how Theta is horrified by him, how she wants to kill him (and almost succeeded, if not for his powers), yet she’s still in awe of his abilities. He’s a psycho who should be put down like a rabid dog, but when he said he likes two-faced women right after Theta shot him in the head, I swear I felt feminism leaving my body.
Lex Luthor x Joker (DC comics): Only recently got into this one, and I don’t think there’s much that needs to be said. I see them as disaster allies / friends with benefits, sticking together out of necessity, and of course even if you’re a billionaire supervillain, you’re never really safe from Joker’s pranks.
Harley Quinn x Poison Ivy (DC comics): I’m not against them being lovey-dovey, I can imagine it, I like it, but I also convinced that at the start their relationship should be messy, there should be power imbalance. Ivy shouldn’t be a perfectly patient doting gf, she’d be frustrated with Harley’s antics, and afraid she might go back to Joker, and snapping at her because of it. Harley should feel like she’s stuck between hammer and anvil with Ivy on one side and Joker on the other. Doesn’t mean Ivy is as bad as him, but she’s still a villain, not just Harley’s green safe haven.
