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@justinpuff:
Glad to help out. I donât really think dating is my kind of thing.
Look at you, breaking the Badger mold, ex-husband. I thought your house was the one full of the schoolâs hopeless romantics. Well...aside from Hugo.
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TEXT â Â GUSTIN
Justin: You donât have to do the work⌠Just supervise! And boss me around.
Gracie: I love bossing people around, but supervising makes it sound like I have to be all responsible! Have you ever known me to be responsible, ex-husband? :-p
[Text]: So how are we going to celebrate after you slaughter Slytherin?
[Text]: I donât know, J, you tell me. I mean, Iâm going to be the winner here, shouldnât I be the one showered in love and adoration? I shouldnât have to do all the work :-p
[Text]: Have you ever had a day that starts out bad but then turns out like really good? And then wake up the next morning and remember you might die?
[text]: Nope, never. All my days have me in them, therefor theyâre all awesome :-p[text]: Whatâs up with you, Diamond? Spill it.
PM: Becca, can you please explain to me how writers can get published with horrible mistakes in their books like forgetting the eye color of the main character? I'm very upset about this.
PM: Oh my Merlin, what have you been reading that had this happen? PM: Itâs quite simple, really. The author can either forget, or they can just mistype while theyâre sleepy or tired, and then when the book goes off to get published, it goes through an acquisitions editor, a substantive editor, a copyeditor, and a proofreader who all ALSO miss the mistake and let it go to print.
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3 4 9
SEND ME A NUMBER:
3. For a text meant for someone else
[TEXT TO JUSTIN đś]: As much as I regret what happened while I was under the love potion, Kels, I guess it could have been worse. Imagine if Iâd fake married Olly! Do you think it makes it less special when you get married for real someday that youâve already done it, sort of?[TEXT TO JUSTIN đś]: Oh my Merlin, I am so sorryâŚ.
4. For a text asking for a favor
[TEXT TO JUSTIN đś]: Hi Justin! Thereâs this great book that Iâve been really wanting Leo to read, but every time I try to give it to him, he makes faces at me for trying to pull a âbook fairyâ on him. Could I maybe get you to read it in the common room (or even just pretend to read it?) so that Leo will think itâs more interesting and finally give it a try?
9. For a long barrage of texts
[TEXT TO JUSTIN đś]: Why is the Joker so rude? Iâve never actually had to deal with him pestering me before, but today he decided it was time to start.[TEXT TO JUSTIN đś]: I thought peacefully reading in the hallways got me immunity![TEXT TO JUSTIN đś]: He stole my book and threw it in a water fountain![TEXT TO JUSTIN đś]: That was my favorite copy of Anna Karenina![TEXT TO JUSTIN đś]: It was the one with the rough-edged pages that make it easier to turn; thatâs really useful for books that long![TEXT TO JUSTIN đś]: I think itâs really just recycled materials and it was close to being worn out anyway, but still! [TEXT TO JUSTIN đś]: Does he terrorize Hufflepuffs too? Youâre all so nice, except for maybe Emily MacDonald.Â
1-9
SEND ME A NUMBER:
1. For a drunk text
[TEXT TO EX-HUSBAND]: who asays quiddithc players canât paryt just as harcd as they play? stupid peeople thats whO
2. For an angry text
[TEXT TO EX-HUSBAND]: WHAT THE HELL KIND OF CALL WAS THAT THAT PROFESSOR KENT MADE EARLIER? WHO CANCELS QUIDDITCH PRACTICE OVER SOMETHING STUPID LIKE THUNDER?Â
3. For a text meant for someone else
[TEXT TO EX-HUSBAND]: Sorry, Pucey, I guess youâre just going to have to settle for being my second ex-husband now. Itâs better than me firing you from the job completely, right? At least this one didnât happen while I was famous :-p
4. For a text asking for a favor
[TEXT TO EX-HUSBAND]: Can you like... maybe stay up one night and record whether or not Hugo snores or not? Or at least be a witness willing to testify on the matter? Because Hugo swears those rumors arenât true and that itâs all Ryderâs fault,Â
5. For a goodbye message
[TEXT TO EX-HUSBAND]: Youâre so going to regret challenging me to this broom race, Diamond. Iâm texting while flying and still kicking your ass. Sayanora, sucker!
6. For a date invite
[TEXT TO EX-HUSBAND]: Yooooo how do you feel about going to Madam Puddifootâs on the next Hogsmeade trip?[TEXT TO EX-HUSBAND]: Crap, I didnât mean on a date! Well, I mean, I did, but not with me. Do you know Clara? Do you like her? Sheâs been really sad ever since Hunter died, Iâm trying to like... I donât know, find her a nice guy or something.Â
7. For a fearful text
[TEXT TO EX-HUSBAND]: Do you think whoever I marry whenever Iâm a pro Quidditch player will actually make me try to change my name? Because what if I change my name halfway through my career and suddenly people forget about me, or half my career with one name and half my career with the other isnât enough for me to be a legend? I EITHER NEED TO GET MARRIED NOW OR NEVER, THIS NAME CHANGING THING COULD RUIN MY LIFE.Â
8. For a corny pick up line
[TEXT TO EX-HUSBAND]: Youâre a Chaser? Because I was sure you were a Keeper! ...get it?
9. For a long barrage of texts
[TEXT TO EX-HUSBAND]: SERIOUSLY WHY DO PEOPLE KEEP TELLING ME TO WATCH THIS BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SHOW? [TEXT TO EX-HUSBAND]: The special effects are so bad. Merlin, Muggles really need magic to improve their shit. [TEXT TO EX-HUSBAND]: WHY DOES THE VAMPIRE SLAYER KEEP FALLING IN LOVE WITH VAMPIRES? ITâS NOT ROMANTIC.[TEXT TO EX-HUSBAND]: Theyâre like 100 years old. 500. Theyâre really freaking old. Sheâs practically a child![TEXT TO EX-HUSBAND]: Although her one human boyfriend was LITERALLY the worst, so maybe thatâs why they put her with vampires instead.[TEXT TO EX-HUSBAND]: I feel so lied to. This show was so overhyped.[TEXT TO EX-HUSBAND]: Youâre a Muggleborn, tell me something I can watch that wonât disappoint me.
WEDDING BELL BLUES â LOVE POTION PROMPT
TAGGING â Gracie Wood & Justin Diamond (@intheskywithdiamond), mentions of Isabel Nott (@slytherisabelin)
TIMELINE â Tuesday, February 9, 2024
SETTING â Hogwarts Grounds
SUMMARY â Gracie and Justin get âmarriedâ while under the influence of the love potion. Written for aghprompt28.
