#afuuro

it started in my seventh grade year. i befriended the two of them after a falling out in friendship two years previous, and i was willing to give them another chance.

early in our friendship, kohen turned extremely violent toward me. this included scratching me, dragging me by the hair, hitting me over the head with nails, and slapping/punching/kicking me, even in public situations. i asked multiple times for him to stop, but the request was never heeded, on the basis that it was "hard for him to control himself."

i never returned hits to kohen, in fear of hurting kohen the way he hurt me.

together, kohen and blobeh would isolate me on purpose, and pretend i was not there, even going to lengths of ignoring me the entirety of the time i would spend with them.

i was referred to as an idiot, as stupid, and worthless. i was also called "the poor kid," which included kohen throwing coins at me to watch me scramble to pick it up, on the basis that i was lesser and needed his charity.

despite this, we remained romantically involved for a long portion of time. our relationship was on and off for three years. finally, i worked up the courage and broke it off with him.

for the entirety of the summer between seventh and eighth grade, we did not speak to one another. throughout eighth grade, he continually assured me he'd changed, and we gave our relationship another try, but i still felt uncomfortable with the situation, and cut ties with him yet again.

blobeh had maintained romantic inclinations toward both kohen and i while we were together. i also expressed my discomfort with this multiple times, yet this was ignored, and eventually resulted in blobeh trying to kiss me and feeling me up while i stayed over at their house. i tried to relay my obvious discomfort with their actions while it was occurring, to no avail. i left the morning after and have not spoken with them since.

for the entirety of my ninth grade year, i didn't have to worry about either of them, seeing as they are both a year younger than me. in tenth grade, kohen moved up to ninth grade and began attending the same school as me once more.

the result of this was as follows: he would glare at me in the halls, and i would shake visibly and nearly puke each time i saw him. he induced such a negative reaction in me, i very nearly went into a panic attack on a daily basis. at one point, i hid beneath a table in the cafeteria so that he wouldn't see me there.

i began to see a therapist about my situation. i also had begun to dissociate at times, which caused me to blank out for an hour at one point in time and hack off my hair. while dissociating, i would check his blog. every time i'd come back from my panic, the page to his blog would be left open and i'd read his personal posts. at the time, most of them would be about me.

although deleted now, the contents of these posts were calling me toxic and twisting the entire situation to show me as the manipulative person in our relationship, even going as far as to him wishing i were dead.

i decided to go to the school counselor about the situation so i could confront him about these posts. when i told him of my concerns, he said he'd made the posts because he "didn't think i was upset about what happened" every time he glared at me. he didn't believe i was until he saw me crying in this therapy session together.

i found out that blobeh and kohen had become romantic partners and i have reason to believe that blobeh lead kohen into thinking these things, because kohen confessed to this himself during our group therapy session at school.

so, to sum up, blobeh and kohen are manipulative, abusive, and toxic people and i not only want others to be aware of this, but i want them to be aware of it themselves, seeing as i cannot forget what they did.