anyway so I hate the fact that Buck as a 100% neurodivergent person is especially susceptible to internalizing outside perceptions of his experiences and behavior because we ND folks usually grow up being told we aren't actually [blank], or it isn't actually hard to [blank] you just aren't trying or aren't doing xyz, or that we shouldn't feel so strongly [blank] because it wasn't a big deal (and Buck had esp icky parental parenting, too), so you get used to accepting what you're told about your own fucking emotions and experiences (and I love Josh so this isn't on him, it's on the writers), so when Buck hears this speech about what he was supposed to think re: Tommy being a "pre-Glee" queer (and stfu because boiling everything fought for and gained and lost 1990-2020 down into pre/post a TV teen drama musical that had literally any lgbtqia+ inclusion *but happened to be popular* is so barf) HE PARROTS IT because he's USED TO THAT being what people want to hear and what the *"correct answer"* to the Adult Human Conversations and Relationships Code quiz is. BUT THEN he follow it with some of his true colors and thoughts and feelings, but the preamble has changed Tommy's perception of the rest of it and triggers all his own shit that makes Buck's apparent idolization scary AND MISCONSTRUES BUCK'S WHOLE INTENT so Buck is genuinely blindsided by Tommy's reaction and confused about what he did wrong (because God knows ND folks are constantly wondering exactly what we did wrong, especially when it results in being left after talking about our feelings).

and tbh the part I'm most mad about is that I'm so sure that you couldn't purposefully write writing this horribly trite and trash about bi or late-discovery-queer people OR neurodivergent people so directly; you have to be oversimplifying Buck in his established traits and applying prejudices so that even subconsciously this is what you come up with, OR PURPOSEFULLY creating this situation to make sure to establish a narrative about bi men/people or queerness and break these two compatible, peaceful beans up for the drama llama.

THEY BOTH DESERVED BETTER AND ND AND/OR QUEER FOLKS DESERVE BETTER REP TOO GOODNIGHT