#ados-2

Reading the doc they gave me and some conclusions don't make sense. Some note says "Unusual hand movements are not observed. no sensory processing issues detected" - yea duh, not observed because I don't do flapping in public, I only do this when I'm at home alone(?)

The whole test was so silly, and the results are solely based on the assessor's observations of the moment, which might not be adequate and lack any context

Basically, the assessor said I’m high-functioning and that all the difficulties I experience are 'mild' because I work and even managed to have some friends. I'm not sure how I feel about that statement. I understand that everything is perceived through comparison, but I struggle like hell because of my condition every single day. Calling it 'mild' and 'not affecting enough' feels like the definition of not being able to read the room on the assessor’s part

The whole experience was exhausting

Yesterday I had my in person autism assessment. Went okay I think. She still needs my spouse and mom to fill out questionnaires, then talk to them on the phone (or at least my mom). I get my results in two weeks. I’m still stressing about it, but not as much as I was, as it’s out of my hands now.

I may give a summary here, for those interested. I know I was searching YouTube to find out what to expect.

First Appointment:

This was over Zoom, as it was 2020 and covid is still an issue. My brain is so fried that I don’t remember much. I sent her a 13 page list of how I met the diagnostic criteria, which made the interview a lot shorter. She asked me to expand on some areas, like my work experiences and why I had so many jobs. 

She gave me an online questionnaire she said was a personality test. I had to rate statements according to how well they fit me. Like a quarter of them related to addiction. Many were basically the same thing only rephrased. A bunch were clearly aimed at psychopaths (I recognized many from online psychopath tests) or schizophrenics (hearing voices, people out to get you). Two were fucking random, like “my favorite poet is [name I didn’t recognize].” I’m guessing they were some sort of control.

Second Appointment:

This one was in-person. The first part was an IQ test. I just googled it and it was the Wechsler Adult Intelligence Scale (WAIS). She asked me to define vocabulary words. There were blocks that I had turn around to make the same pattern as one on a card. It started really easy and got progressively difficult--like to the point where it looked impossible. It was the same with patterns--easy then gradually harder. Some of them I probably could have figured out if I’d stared at them long enough, but I felt kinda pressured to hurry with her watching.

I had to fill out questionnaires on social anxiety and regular anxiety and probably depression.

After that she gave me the ADOS test, which is an autism test. There was a book with pictures but no words and I had to describe the story. She asked my what I thought friendship meant, how it feels to be angry or sad, and what things people do that irritate me. I drew a blank on that last one, which sucks cause I could bitch about people all fucking day, but performance anxiety rendered me incapable of answer. I told her I’d walk out and immediately be able to think of 20 things. She asked what I do that bothers other people.

There were a couple of things with objects. At one point she put a bunch of stuff on the desk and asked me to entertain myself while she “finished writing stuff down,” which is code for “I’m going to clandestinely watch while you play with this shit and take notes.” There was a magazine, one of those things with the pins where you put your hand in it and make an impression (which I just googled and it knew exactly what I was talking about), a mini pinball thing (the kind you’d take on a car ride to keep a kid busy), white paper, a doodletop, and another object I can’t remember. She said the paper was for the doodletop and explained it had a marker on the tip. I said I didn’t want it to spin and mark up her desk and she said it would stay on the paper, so I tried it.

Guys.

Doodletops are fucking bomb. They draw concentric circles. I got one really nice spin where the loops started nice and big before they got smaller. I ordered a couple when I got home. 😆 I was probably supposed to pick the magazine or something if I’m NT but like who the hell in their right mind picks a magazine when there are toys present?

Then there was another set of random objects. I had to pick five and then use them to tell a story. It wasn’t very good (I need prep time, and I had performance anxiety). I had a guy drive from him home to a crowded lake and get covid and then drive home again. She’s like, “Is that it?” I’m like yeah, cause I was out of objects, but then said he probably spread covid to his roommates if he had any.

That’s all I can remember.

Oh dear, I usually try to glance at my asks to see if any of them are time-sensitive like this one, and answer those more quickly, but it seems I missed this one.

I’m so sorry, Kyle, that I didn’t catch this in time for your evaluation.  But if you would like to talk about how it went, please let me know!

I will still tell you about my own experience, so that others can see it and also so you can compare it to yours.

I had two evaluations.  The first one gave me a test called ADOS-2.  This one had activities obviously geared towards children.  They asked me to read from a child’s storybook and tell them about the pictures in each page.  They asked me to play with some blocks and put them on a pattern.  They asked me to play with some toys using my imagination.  They asked me to tell a story.  I was 35 years old at the time.  But there are no autism tests for adults, and so this is what I was given.

So apparently with the block one, the test-giver is supposed to hold some of the blocks so you can’t complete the puzzle, and they’re actually grading you on how you “socially interact” to get the blocks, and it has nothing to do with the puzzle.  I totally failed this part apparently because I just took the blocks from her part of the table because I didn’t even realize she was “holding” them?  I have no idea if this was administered correctly to me or not *giant shrug*.

The second evaluation I had was called the CARS-2. In this one, the psychiatrist just talked to me and asked me a bunch of questions about what behaviors I do in my life, and how I was as a child, such as at what age I learned to talk.  He asked me what kinds of toys I played with, whether I had friends, whether I was bullied, etc. It was just a conversation where he asked me mostly about my childhood and a little about myself now, and he also did observations of me.

I couldn’t find my ADOS-2 result papers (while looking for them I found my taxes from last year, whoohoo!).  But I DID find my CARS-2 results.  And because I know how scary it is to not know, I will post a picture of it so you all can see what the evaluation looks like:

This is the scoring part.  From NCBI, the scoring works like this:

The CARS consists of 14 domains assessing behaviors associated with autism, with a 15th domain rating general impressions of autism. Each domain is scored on a scale ranging from one to four; higher scores are associated with a higher level of impairment. Total scores can range from a low of 15 to a high of 60; scores below 30 indicate that the individual is in the non-autistic range, scores between 30 and 36.5 indicate mild to moderate autism, and scores from 37 to 60 indicate severe autism.

And here is what an actual one looks like (mine):

Then along with that there are also two sections the doctor wrote:

You can see why functioning labels are impossible to get rid of.  They’re right in our evaluations.  Yay (sarcasm)

And he also wrote this:

That’s the part with the actual signature on it that I gave to my job.  The nitty-gritty details on the first two pages aren’t ANYBODY’S business but your own.

La ADOS-2 es, un pilar en la evaluación del autismo, proporcionando a los profesionales una herramienta confiable para ayudar en el diagnóstico y comprensión del TEA.