hey, this is for anyone. i'm a 23yr old trans guy - i'm not in a place where transitioning is realistic for me yet, but my body dysphoria (i'm very curvy/traditionally feminine) is kinda holding me back in my studies (acting school) bc when working on the physicality of a character i can't let go of how uncomfortable i am in my own skin, and i'm just feeling really discouraged atm. i could really use some comfort, i guess. - kieran
To our dearest friend Kieran,
You should be proud of yourself for who you are. I certainly am.
Our human friends have told us that there has been many dark things happening in their world, but I am here to remind you that, with darkness, is light. There is goodness in the world. You are one of them.
While you are temporarily unable to transition, I hope I can find ways to help you cope and alleviate how uncomfortable you feel in the body you have at the moment.
Lucky for all of us, there is no Lord of the Boobs, so we donāt have any One Single Binder to Rule us All, and in the darkness, Bind them.
Here are some good links for binders that can help you feel a little more comfortable in your body--if you already know about binders, perhaps this is a good starting point on finding the best binder(s) that fit your need.
https://letsqueerthingsup.com/2015/06/05/binding-while-broke-i-tried-all-these-cheapish-chest-binders-so-you-dont-have-to/
https://transguys.com/features/chest-binding
With dealing with periods, here are some neat links that I found that can help, perhaps, with dealing with periods.
https://www.shethinx.com/pages/people-with-periods
https://www.shethinx.com/collections/period-panties/products/boyshort
https://everydayfeminism.com/2014/11/trans-guys-guide-menstruation/
https://www.seventeen.com/health/a20963434/trans-and-non-binary-periods/
You can opt to take birth control, whether itās the pill or an IUD as they can help control and manage your periods. An IUD allows you to stop having periods up to three years and you can skip all your periods if you are on the bill, save for about four times a year (for some...kind of health reason; I wish I understood human biology!) If you have a doctor you can trust, you can discuss with them on how to use birth control effectively if you can not do hormone treatment at the moment.Ā
Kieran, dear friend! I hope these are some good starting points for you in regards to safely transitioning into a body that you feel comfortable in.Ā
Now, if youāre not in a safe space to wear a chest binder (or even a sports bra, as those can also alleviate some discomfort, I think, perhaps) or find ways to control your period, I would 1) find a support group for ftm that you can find comfort with 2) make sure you have resources at your college. donāt be afraid to ask for a therapist who can help you cope during this difficult time. 3) Research, research research!!! It pays to research. This is your body and itās important to have all the information you need so when youāre able to transition, you can do it in a safe and healthy manner and have a safe place to do so, as well.Ā
You can also treat this time of not being able to transition as a way to hone your acting skills. Iām not an actor so Iām not very familiar with all of it, but perhaps you can pretend to be a spy. That youāre on an undercover mission of being a Human Lady and you gotta play the part. (Method acting? Iām unsure of the terminology...) That you have to be undercover to find out whatās on the Cis and Straight Agenda and youāre getting information to fight back.Ā
Kieran, you are very much loved. You are a very wonderful person and you have resilience despite what you feel. No matter WHAT happens, you are, as our human friends say, āa kick-ass dude, a funky superb human being.āĀ
I hope this letter finds you well.Ā
PS. Kieran, I got a little OOC at the end, but Iām sure Frodo and all the hobbits would find delight in our meme phrases.Ā āRise and Shine my...my hobbit-dudes! Itās time to make some dough! and then eat it! And then have second breakfast!ā
PPS. Donāt forget to eat second breakfast. Frodo says itās the second most important meal of the day. :)Ā