Apr 29, 2025
🚪I'd. Take. It.
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🚪I'd. Take. It.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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There you go.
Okay you want an adderall rant about you? You're not a bad guy. I hate that you think that sometimes. You're always there for me. I trust you like i trust Meghan and Mat. You're one of my best friends and i don't just give that title away gently. You're smart as fuck. You own it. You know it. You have the potential to be that scientist thing you want to be. You just need motivation and I'm trying to be that nudge but you have to take the initiative. Get a job man you're on the computer and your phone enough. I got the job at Wendy's by applying on my phone lol if i can do it You can do it . Rachelle is in love with you. Accept it. Give her a chance. She's not the prettiest or the smartest but you never know unless you try. Besides you act like you have a crush on her whether you'd like to admit it or not. I enjoy time spent with you. You're goofy as fuck and trustworthy as fuck and i love it. You're a damn trip lmao. I hate that you are upset with yourself and your way of thinking but only you can change that. The voices you hear there's help for that. How you want to cut there's help for that. How you want to die sometimes there's help for that. There's days at a time where I'll be super depressed like last week for example if you couldn't tell. My past and everything that's stressing me out now and money and bills and my parents and my sister just get to me. And i just don't want to be alive. I just feel so utterly and completely helpless and it sucks so bad bc i can't help. I'm not able to say what i think or what I'm feeling. It's just not possible and i have no fucking idea why. Then that feeling is gone all the sudden. It's weird and Idk I'm probs bipolar but i don't ask for help because what am i supposed to say.
qwerty
okay well. i have way to much going on in my mind for me to handle it & too much shit going on outside my head that brings back my anxiety. and i dont know if i can deal with it all much longer because sooner or later im going to crack. i always do once everything starts to bad again.
fucking school has always played a major role in my depression. i thought once i graduated everything we finally be good with me and my family and i have never been more wrong. macomb fucked me completely. i quit two classes late and was set up with a payment plan of $911 for $76 a month. well i dont pay for two months and i get a letter in the mail saying my payment plan was revoked and starting last month now i get a 25% delinquent fee every month its not paid. to get an idea i had $610 left and it is now $765. by february it should almost a grand. I LOST MY FUCKING JOB GIVE ME A BREAK. figures once i want to actually go to school i cant. yippie.
i cant say that im proud of who i am today or that i saw myself here last year or even i week ago. who im becoming i really like. i actually for once see potential in myself. i honestly dont know where it came from. i feel like if i push myself enough in this moment i can become successful. Â thats really all that could make me calm the fuck down.
i really cant think straight..
my friendships are deteriorating as i type this. no one really likes me. unless its just me who doesnt like anyone. i dont have time for people unless im up for days on adderall. i miss having friends. i miss having a phone full of contacts. i miss going out. i miss people. i dont want to waste my life away just sleeping with my boyfriend all day and night. thats not something thats fun for me anymore. yeah its nice to cuddle but not constantly we've been dating for almost a year we're not in the honey moon phase any more my dear.
im so broke that it gives me the worst anxiety. money money money money money is all i hear. thats all anything is about and i have 0. im in debt. i owe everyone money. and i'll be upfront about it i want everything. my parents are constantly asking me for money im always being told there needs to be gas put in the tank or we need cigarettes or we need weed. I DO NOT HAVE MONEY. sorry not sorry.
i honestly need to work on bettering myself and only myself. im going crazy trying to make sure everyone else is sane.Â
i just have to wait for someone who can get into my mind like i get into everyone elses.
so i just wanted to say i'm extremely thankful for the aesthetics that tumblr is providing me and i'm finding some posts that i would never reblog to be hilarious and i just want to favorite all of them to look at them sometime and i'm listening to weird music that's pretty cool sounding to my ears ok uh. i don't know, i want to talk but i have no one to talk to or don't know what to talk about but if you have a subject you want to talk about with a random person for any reason i'm here and accepting so sup
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
Monday Night Thought/Rant?
Intelligence is so damn sexy
Like...
Talk to me about politics, law, society, the economy... Do my math homework hahaha.
I don't care. Knowing someone can speak or do anything intelligently  is so attractive.Â