#adamparrishwrites

❝ This is the part where you leave me alone.❞

why are you and dani like this????

A giant slut and a heartbreaker

Hopsotches around friendship and relationship with literally everyone

Plays wonderwall when literally no one asked him to

Has abs but never goes to the gym? how I ask you

Owns this shirt

Gets highlights and insists they’re real

rich but still crashes on other people’s couches

My sweet gay sunshine child, I miss her too :’)

Doesn’t tie her shoes. Falls because she doesn’t tie her shoes. Should invest in slip-ons

Wears shorts too much. Should invest in pants

Too tall for good pants

A cycled dilemma

Forgets to lock her bike and has definitely ‘lost’ it 3 times this past month

Will probably take off her shirt to skype her gf and forgets said gf isn’t alone

Talks too much to strangers. Is banned from the bus for this reason

Too gay to function

Forgets to call her sister even when her sister calls her

steals balls from public parks and hoards them

My space son!! I love him, okay lets do this

Forgetful as fuck but will remember inane facts

Was never a boy scout so he wasn’t prepared for his gf allergic reaction to nature

decided nature was a good dating activity

Doesn’t know how to make friends irl

White boy with too many opinions (they’re mostly about space so not so bad)

Doesn’t know when to shut up

Watches too many conspiracy Youtube videos. And buzzfeed videos on top of that.

Ruins his sleep schedule Lacks a sleep schedule

decided he was committed to his online bff before they even know what the other looked like

My boy....the original rump shaker...where to even begin....

Fuckboy: Basement Edition

Do I even get into that, how would I???

Stalker but in an ~artistic~ way

Well into his 30s and still hipster garbage

Artist hipster garbage to be precises

insists every season is sweater season

how has he not died of heat stroke by now wtf

Grooming??? is it a thing? Sources say no.

I mean look at him

Says he doesn’t hold grudges but definitely holds grudges. Holds grudges until the day he dies

Hurts his friends and doesn’t even apologize for it >:(

Family issues? what family issues

So much internalized everything he’s basically a walking pickle jar

Did not put flames on his wheel chair. Opportunity, wasted.

Hermitted Duck Man ™

Refuses to acknowledge his duck isn’t less than angelic

Would own more ducks if people wouldn’t stop him

Claims to be an artist but where’s the art, Henry? When was the last time you made anything

Has probably done more but this list is getting long

A mess: Avoid if seen on the streets

3/10!!