Okay, now that’s getting creepy. He didn’t even ask you to draw that.
TT: Aw, that's it? TT: I thought we were getting into a good rhythm there. TT: Anyway, you missed out on like half the pairings. uu: WHAT. HALF. NO WE DID MOST OF THEM DIDN'T WE. TT: No, we did three, and there are three possible matchups left. TT: Don't you know anything about shipping science? uu: THAT'S A THING? uu: HOW THE FuCK COuLD THAT BE A THING. TT: Believe me. TT: It's a thing. TT: Total number of pairings for a group of n people is (n^2 - n) / 2. TT: You divide by 2 to cut the grid in half, eliminate duplicate pairs. TT: Minus n is so you don't pair people up with themselves. That wouldn't make sense. uu: AND WHY THE FuCK NOT?? TT: Well, because... TT: I don't know. TT: Maybe you're right. Maybe I was being close-minded about self-pairing. What do I know?
Oh great, a shipping argument. Fun.
uu: JACK SHIT OBVIOuSLY. uu: ANYWAY. FuCK ALL THAT. YOu DON'T SPOIL GOOD DEBAuCHERY. WITH A LOT OF STuPID MATH. uu: YOu MAY THINK YOu'RE SMART. BuT EXCESSIVE SMARTNESS CAN MAKE YOu BE MORE OF AN IDIOT. uu: INTELLIGENT IDIOCY CAN BE EASILY EXPLOITED BY THE CuNNING AND RuTHLESS. JuST A TIP FOR YOu. BRO. TT: I'll make a note. TT: So you sure you don't want even one more drawing? TT: You used Jane and Roxy in two pairings. But me and Jake only got one. TT: How is that fair? uu: I DECIDE WHAT IS FAIR IN MY GAMES.
That is basically the exact opposite of what fair means.
uu: IF YOu ARE PROPOSING TO ILLuSTRATE THE JAKE HuMAN BEHAVING AMOROuSLY WITH THE DIRK HuMAN. THE ANSWER IS NO. TT: Why not? uu: THAT ENCOuNTER DOES NOT SEEM AS REPREHENSIBLY SCANDALOuS. uu: FIRST OF ALL. I ASK OF YOu. WHERE ARE THE BITCHES AT? uu: I REST MY CASE. TT: Lame. uu: SECOND OF ALL. I DON'T WISH TO LANGuISH IN THE PuMPKIN PATCH. TT: What? uu: ORANGE AND EMERALD. uNPLEASANT TOGETHER. uu: I HAVE NO TASTE FOR PuMPKINS. OR ANY HORRID VEGETABLE MATTER. uu: MEAT OR CANDY. THAT'S WHAT'S GOOD. THE GAME IS OVER. TT: Fine. TT: I'll keep all my illustrated debasements to myself, then. uu: GOOD. DO THAT.
It is kind of creepy that you want to be ordered to draw shipping art of yourself and the dude you have a crush on. That shit isn’t healthy.
TT: Ok. I will. TT: So did I win? uu: I WILL SAY. uu: YES. uu: YOu WERE COOPERATIVE AND GENERALLY ENTHuSED ABOuT MY GAME. uu: CONGRATuLATIONS DIRK. TT: Thanks. TT: So what's the shitty twist? uu: AH! BuT NOT SO FAST. uu: YOu SEE. THERE IS A TWIST TO MY SHITTY TWIST. TT: A twisted twist? TT: Like... a double mobius handjob or something? uu: YES. PROBABLY.
Dammit I do not want to see that.
That said, I’m impressed he managed to actually win the “game”. I didn’t think that was even possible.
