Jul 10, 2025
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Coercive Control An act or a pattern of acts of assault, threats, humiliation and intimidation or other abuse that is used to harm, punish, or frighten a victim.
different anon but um, nobody is gaslighting you by asking you to be mindful of the way you talk about personality disorders. also, i may be wrong but you seemed to imply in your response that all abusers have personality disorders... they dont, people with those disorders are often survivors too, and it's reasonable to ask for more consideration of that fact. the other anon was perfectly polite and within their rights to ask that, and they didn't deserve to be accused of a literal abuse tactic... people correcting you on things and asking for more consideration isnt an attack. we can condemn the abusers who do have npd/aspd while still listening to survivors who also have those disorders. it's not an easy issue in the trauma survivor community but we have to try......
I'll answer this ask by using my reply to the ask you're referring to. I'll put your comments in bold.
This Tumblr is for survivors of abuse. Abusers have many forms and methods of abuse. Abusers also have personality disorders. "you seemed to imply in your response that all abusers have personality disorders..."
To clarify, with in the context of this tumblr, yes, the abusers have personality disorders.
Those abusers who don't have personality disorders tend to be addicted to drugs or alcohol, and are abusive when under the influence. When they are sober, they aren't abusive. This does not negate their abusive behaviour, and they are abusive, and abusers.
Here you go: Pgs 32-33 LINK LINK Narcissistic Abuse Antisocial personality disorder
"we can condemn the abusers who do have npd/aspd while still listening to survivors who also have those disorders." It's so survivors know in no uncertain terms the abuse is not their fault but the abusers, and the abusers alone.
"they dont, people with those disorders are often survivors too, and it's reasonable to ask for more consideration of that fact." If you’re working on healing and recovery, you’re more than welcome here.
"um, nobody is gaslighting you by asking you to be mindful of the way you talk about personality disorders." If you’re here to try and undermine what trauma informed is for survivors, then kick rocks. That’s gaslighting. (Key words: If you're here to try)
To all of my followers, its important to recognize the signs of abuse, and abusive behaviours.
How Abusers Can Be Identified?
Oz