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💔 Who was your character thinking of before the last part of Glenda’s message cut off?
She doesn’t even know most of the time. A hundred names have run through her mind and a hundred more probably will. The names that stick out the most, Dorcas is more than aware of the fact that the people she want to come back will not be the ones that come back, those are the ones that are buried in the midst of a graveyard and there is no resurrection.
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Hermit and Tower
hermit: what are you like when you’re alone?
answered here.
tower: what do you most want to change about yourself?
Some days Dorcas wonders if it would be a crime to wish that she could change everything about herself. She wishes she’d had an actual childhood and hadn’t felt the pressure that her family had put on their children, she wishes that she had never had that accident that ruined Quidditch for her, she wishes that she could leave Quidditch in the past and just enjoy what she has now. She wishes she could change all of that and more (even the fact that she wishes it was easier to tame her hair some mornings and so easy others). No, what she’d most want to change isn’t about herself and it isn’t as easy as wishing either.
Herself though, she’d probably land on her wrists most days -- she knows she could do more if she wasn’t fearing the risk of shattering her wrists again.
moon + hanged man.
hanged man: how do you feel about martyrs?
There is a purpose for each person and while Dorcas would like to believe that it never will involve sacrificing themselves for someone else or for a cause, she’s more aware than ever that it s a reality of life when you allow yourself to care about things. They’re brave and incredibly sacrificial in many ways, but Dorcas aches for everything that could have been for them and all the moments that they’re missing.
moon: do you have any recurrent dreams?
She still dreams of that game, the match that left her in the hospital and attempting to rehab her wrists, and while they are few and far between compared to the frequency that they had come in the year immediately following the accident, Dorcas still wakes up choking for air and phantom pain shooting through her hands and arms. More often than not, she will get out of bed and go on flying to, for a short while, remind herself that even if it happened she at least is mostly whole again.
There are still times she has flashes of the news articles, the days after when the wizarding world was in hushed silence and the months after where she could still see the hushed silence in people’s movements. While she never remembers the dreams of reading the list of names from Godric’s Hollow or the way that people looked whenever someone came within the wards of Godric’s Hollow, the split second of panic before they recognize the face, but she does wake up with the pit of dread in her stomach and a knot in her heart still.
Judgement
judgement: how confident are you in yourself?
Enough? Dorcas knows that she can do things that she puts her mind to, she has before, and she tries to use that consciously. Right now that means that she is seeing if she can find any information for the Order in regards to what has happened to those missing but the more time passes, the more impatient that she gets to have something tangible to hold onto other than her comrades grief.
If you take the Order out of this, her confidence in herself remains even though she does not have a solid direction on where she will take her future. She wants to do something more with her life than forever being a barmaid, but she’d spent her entire life knowing that she would go into Quidditch professionally. Despite knowing that she likely can do anything that she needed to or wanted to in the end, she hasn’t found something that has quite the same grasp on her as Quidditch still does. In the meantime, I’m sure she’ll have fun getting to know what she is able to do just because she knows she can learn it.
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darling - what romantic gesture makes you feel the most loved?
Dorcas will cherish someone who makes time for her and lets her feel valued — while she’s an incredibly tactile thing, the piece that will always push her over the edge will be time spent. And it doesn’t have to be the most time spent, but making the time spent really matter in the grand scheme. A short, five minute conversation in regards to what’s going on around them can mean more than an hour of just talking about books or politics to her. (not that she’ll turn down a healthy debate either)
◆
◆ - for a confession regarding my muse’s family.
Dorcas no longer speaks to her family since the accident. While there is the birthday cards that are sent and the occasional owl trying to check in from her mother, Doe can’t reconcile the fact that her parents were okay with shutting her out because of a plain accident, something that was out of her control. In a million years she never thought she’d be in a position that she couldn’t play quidditch anymore and certainly never a position where her parents looked at her like she was a disappointment.
She’d spent her life struggling to live up to their expectations, sacrifices what effectively ended up being her childhood and it was all for nothing. Her career was over before it really started going and she couldn’t ever play again and was advised not to fly unless she was okay with the risk of losing the use of her hands she if she fell again. While she remains polite to her sisters when she sees them in London, she will not talk to her parents and have them remind her of all the disappointments that she had given them.
Dorcas Eleanor Meadowes, barmaid / owl post office clerk / former Quidditch player
Do the one thing you think you cannot do. Fail at it. Try again. Do better the second time. The only people who never tumble are those who never mount the high wire. This is your moment. Own it.
Hollowed Souls RPG
