#about ktk

I had to say goodbye to my best friend today. It was the hardest goodbye I have ever said. It was the knowing I would never get to hold her again, wake to her at my bedside, or love on her.

Abby Van Buren came into my life almost 12 years ago on my spring break and stayed in my heart. She chewed up blankets and clothes to leave an everlasting mark. She could clear a room after every meal, she didn't mean to, just look at that face your honor. She played mediator in Princess Santi and Teckla’s fights, always trying to give kisses to distract them. She was their favorite.

Abby's favorite human was my dad because he fed her unless he was at work then I had the privilege of the best cuddles. I don't know what I'm going to do now without my best friend. I know she's in a better place where she knows no pain, no cancer, and where the answer is always yes.

So I'm high functioning autistic. I did decent in school, but when it comes to remembering things, people telling me things, like minor details, i.e., they love to play Kingdom Hearts on PlayStation 3, that's locked into my brain. I'm going to remember that about you for years. Like I'll probably buy you things to do with the things you like. Anyways. Because of this, you could tell me, hey Katy, I'm going to put this box in my closet, but I have to know what it looks like and be paying attention. ADHD plays a part in this.

This is where things get sort of funny... I lost my Papa when I was 10 years old, and I know what his urn looked like. I vividly remember we did not put any of my Papa in his grave. I told my family this when my Nana passed away last year, and everyone was like you don't know what you are talking about; he's in the ground. My dad and brother were on my side about this. I couldn't contact my mom. She's sort of passed on... Anyways we buried my nana's urn, I missed the funeral due to traffic, and I had a breakdown at my Papa's grave. It was so embarrassing. This really nice biker guy even came up to me and gave me his handkerchief and told me I was too pretty to be crying. Anyways... sorry rambling

If you are still even here. I get a call last week. It was my Aunt. The rest of my Nana's stuff had arrived, and my Aunt had been going through it. She's freaking out, near tears, in hysterics, "I found Papa!" I'm like calm down, "what do you mean you found papa?" She found him in his urn, in a bag with a bread tab keeping his closed. A BREAD TAB is keeping him CLOSED! 😂 I'm laughing because my Papa collected bread tabs to teach me how to do maths, and it's just so him! Needless to say, I had a breakdown at an empty grave last spring. My poor papa got beat to his grave by his wife, who probably has now decorated it so out of style for him, and my Mom is probably getting a huge kick out of this.

My Psychiatrist asked me how I'm handling this. Honestly, I'm laughing while just wanting to go TOLD YOU SO! But my mom's family has a bad habit of never listening to me, so there isn't much I can do about it. If you read this far, send me the word Peanut Butter, and I'll make you a moodboard of your choice.

“I’m falling more in love with every single word I’ll withhold. I’m falling more in love with every single word you say. I’m falling head over heels for you. I’ve been dancing on the tops of buildings, with you.” – This Providence “My Beautiful Rescue”

Yes, you can!

3. Do you feel more connected to the moon or the sun?

Moon, I had insomnia as a child really bad, and I still do, but I always felt this pull to anything that I had a moon on it or to look for the moon when it was nighttime.

6. When's the last time you felt like you were floating?

Okay, TW for feels, but sometimes when I'm in pain, I hold my breath, so earlier this week, I was in pain all over, and I didn't realize I was holding my breath till I started to feel floaty. Don't worry. I took Tylenol and got into bed.

7. What do you enjoy daydreaming about most?

4. What is a song reminds you of good times?

There are actually a few that came to my mind right away. I Have A Feeling by Black Eyed Peas, Man I Feel Like A Woman by Shania Twain and Wannabe by Spice Girls

17. What is the “worst” song you still love because of nostalgia?

Macarena by Los Del Río

23. What song never gets old?

Truly Madly Deeply by Savage Garden

2. What is the first album you listened to all the way through?

As a child, my parents were huge on music, so it probably was something by either Phil Collins, Meat Loaf, Bruce Springsteen, or Donna Summers. But I can vividly remember having the Titanic soundtrack and Savage Garden self-titled on cassette tape. I listen to both back-to-back on my walkman.

7. What album do you think still holds up to this day, even if you weren’t nostalgic about it?

I would have to say Shania Twain's 1997 album Come On Over.

25. What artist/ album influenced your personality the most?

Hey Ash, thanks for asking me!

If you’re an author, how many WIPs do you currently have? (Be honest!)... I should say 5, but really it's 3. I'm just not that into Sebastian Stan anymore, and I'd rather focus on the stuff I'm into now. That being said if someone asked me to write more of the Bucky stuff, I would do it in a heartbeat.

What’s next on your ‘to-read’ list? (Fan fiction or otherwise)... Fanfiction wise: Bend The Rules by @peakyscillian (I'm holding out till the next recommendation list) and Book: Wendy Darling by A.C. Wise