The tale of the session from the 6th, from Alex/Fardoin’s perspective and in ‘greentext’ format for easy reading:

> Be me, Dwarven Bard

> Be not me, DM, Changeling Bard, Wood Elf Bard, and Human Ranger

> Be not at this particular session, Wood Elf Monk and 2 High Elf Druids

> Trying to continue main campaign, missing characters have good excuses to be taking a break anyway

> Talk to Governor about our next assignment (King is dead, sacrificed himself for our old characters, after which we got TPK’d, but that’s another story)

> Need to go East to find the King’s son so he can take the throne

> Decide to go by sea, Gov gives us a note of passage  

> Head to docks after escorting some guards somewhere else, where slight shenanigans ensue; more on that later

> Get to dock after shutting down a potential plothook from a nutty NPC who got our old characters in shit

> Find our boat

> Ranger, a total memelord, decides to yeet the note to one of the deckhands

> Nat 1, note falls in water

> I dive in after it

> Bard bros follow suit

> I fail my Dex save to get out the way

> One of my Bard bros lands on me, 4 damage

> Other Bard bro suddenly realises he can’t swim

> We all get out, ashamed

> Ranger tries to get note

> Can’t get deep enough to save it, as it is now sinking

> Oh_fuck.jpg

> Crew won’t let us on board now

> Changeling tries to pretend to be the Governor to try to convince them to let us on

> Bad rolls ensue

> Guards from earlier show up

> angery.jpg

> This was not the first time today the Changeling had impersonated the Governor

> Guards realised after reporting to real Governor

> Wood Elf Bard bro is fucking terrified of these guards (the captain had rolled a Nat 20 Intimidate earlier)

> Gets idea to sneak onto the boat

> We fail

> Oh_fuck.jpg

> Changeling Bard bro and I have Message chat

> We both have Invisibility and enough spell slots to cast it twice each

> Whole party goes ghost and sneaks onto ship

> Stowaway time

> I fail another Dex save

> wut.jpg

> Crewman bumps into me

> They know we’re here

> ohshitohshitohshit

> Desperately try to avoid combat and capture while trying to get anchors away

> Crew is relentless in searching

> Wood Elf Bard bro decides we can’t fuck around any more

> Shoots Captain of ship

> One hit kill

> roll_initiative.wav

> Wood Elf Bard bro is netted and tied up alarmingly quickly

> There is some shoving off the boat

> Two more people wind up falling on me

> 12 damage total from people landing on me, only damage I take all session

> Fight goes south really fast as guards board the boat

> None of us want to kill the guards

> We eventually surrender

> Get hauled off to palace dungeons

> We’re all in jail

> All because the Ranger tried to yeet a sheet of parchment

> In one session we’ve managed to fuck the campaign