I know you’re out there, I feel your longing too. <3
We all have many soulmates, many types too: romantic, platonic, sexual, and some in gray, clouded combinations of something “other”, in my opinion. (Perhaps, souls in past lives in which we deeply knew.)
I know mine are all probably out there, mostly isolated from the world too. I hope despite our temperament, that fate will bring us together, at least once in this lifetime.
If nothing else, to let our hearts and souls kiss, once. Take in embrace, only once, one another; just a breath of the others essence as it escapes the senses, leaving only the faintest fragments of a memory of a memory, swiftly leaving just as quickly as it came, to be suspended, both of us, dizzy, in a fog of a deliriously, dazzling, dust.
(It is in this, and solely this, that I live, love, die and trust.)
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What are friends for? // Boys will be boys, and so much more.
Kiss your blood off my knuckles and I’ll kiss mine from your lips.
You have such a way to hate me so kindly, I feel and taste the love pour from your fingertips.
Take your time, make sure to make it last.
Please, carry it out as long as you can so onto it, we might truly grasp.
Or at least a little while longer, because so soon after I miss,
the tender movement of our hips.
Fading into the gray,
And I lie to myself and say,
‘It’s fine..’ That, ‘it’s okay’,
Going on as we do in this way.
Not a day can pass without me wishing for something more though.
But you being you and all, I’m afraid to say, all that you don’t know.
The feelings I feel written so clear to see,
In every time you so much as look at me.
But if that had been true, well, I’d hope by now, you would have said so.
Part of me wishes I’d just ask, worst you could say is ‘no’.
But if that were really the worst-case scenario,
I would have done so, long ago.
The very worst thing, the thought always inside my head, ringing, that keeps me up at night.
It's that, in the end, my doubts which haunt me, might be right.
Still, you grant me peace of murky secrets, whispered only ever here, in dead of night.
places only we know. where in the dark we glow
so hot and bright, like embers lighting our way to a place where everything feels alright.
for a while anyways.
the love we share
only ever here, makes us pure, everclear.
What a shame only that it lay here when we go back to lives out there.
But oh, how beautiful, more than worth while.
If i could never leave this land of death you bring me to,
never to the land of living again i would gladly go... For you.
Deny my condemned spirit entry back into my body once you’ve killed me tonight,
So, this that time, my love.. To stay with you, here, forever, I just might. -- A.K.Rx
My second attempt at a poem in russian. But i guess it's a poem in english too.
Title:
Боролся, изнемогая, взял, разорвал в клочья и умер с улыбкой. -
Struggling (fighting), exhausted, he took it, tore it to shreds, and died with a smile.
Простите меня, - Forgive me,
за слабость, - for my weakness,
судьбой, то есть. - fate, that is.
Вот как идет история. - Here’s how the story goes.
У вас идет кровь из носа. - Your nose is bleeding
Пахнет так же сильно, как роза. - It smells as strongly as a rose.
Так странно, отчаянно, люблю, - So strangely, desperately, in love,
то есть, стоит стоит. - that is to say, It’s worth it.
Такую дружбу не скоро забудешь. - This is friendship, one which you can’t soon forget. -- A.K.Rx
(ATM i am still using translation tools, i hope to get to the level of not needing them.)
Sometime i really am overtaken with such a lonely longing for living, for loving; and then i weep that aching clean from out of me, and i am again content in finding i was alone all this while to do so so freely, a somber chill course through me at this knowing. Then too, an understanding, and a thankfulness that no one was there to have hurt me in such delicate states of being as these. Hands smeared with wet of mournful reaching's, of all my fears coming to be amplified upon deaf ears, for no one knows, no one is here for me to convince to care.
But i, I'm here.-- AKRx
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