12:54
I’m at my weakest point. My body, it feels frail. It feels as if someone literally took all the energy and sucked it right out of me. My muscles are resilient. They move with me because they have to, not because they chose to. They are in pain, they are tired of the whole charade. For once, they’d like to simply stay still and say Fuck you. But they don’t. They are in it until the end, and will continue until they make amends. It’s irony at it’s peak. I’m drained physically but my mind won’t shut down. My mind wants to explore the realms of tomorrow and eternity. It wants to reach outside this tainted world far beyond what’s tangible. For once in my life I feel complete. I’ve been able to face everyone who hurt me and at last accepted it for its face value. There is no sense of lingering curiosity, because when you know, you just know, so you let go. And it’s thee most cliche thing any one can ever say but it’s the most magnificent feeling anyone will be able to tame. The ability to simply say, “I know” without a reason, based on pure emotion, based on pure interaction, based on pure chemistry. It-is. Fucking. Amazing. Even more so when there is no theory behind it. But when there is, they will kill the beauty of it. Just how they have done with everything tasteful in this world, burn it to pieces, corrupt it to ashes, fight over it like animals, and let it die.
