Itâs a collaboration for Murdocâs big day!! @trashfrog99 and I worked together to produce this art and story to celebrate our favorite Satanist! Also, I must credit @elapsed-spiral for the concept of Murdocâs gift being a sort of âKong 2.0âł (her words, her story Yearz). That chapter was a huge inspiration for what this story would morph into. Rating: T Warnings: None Murdocâs grand plan to sleep until approximately four in the afternoon was dashed by the tentative knock on his door around lunchtime. âBoss?â Aceâs voice called, âyou up?â He fumbled around blindly until he found a bottle opener on his bedside table and threw it at the door to communicate his annoyance. âI am now,â he growled, sitting up and smoothing his disheveled bedhead as best he could. âGive us a tic, you twat, Iâm not decent.â After the pre-birthday celebration that heâd had with Stu, that was a wild understatement. The cap to a bottle of lube and a veritable parade of condom wrappers scattered across the floor as he threw his bed sheets aside and groped around for something to wear. A full two minutes later, he was zipping up a pair of jeans and trying to sort out his rattiest Prince tee-shirt, which seemed determined to remain inside out. âYeah, what do you want at the ass-crack of dawn anyway?â he asked, opening the door and half-expecting Ace to have vacated already. But the American stood there, sunglasses hanging from the neck of his tee and a smile on his boney face. âHappy birthday, bossman!â he replied, punching Murdocâs shoulder (he was strong for such a scrawny guy; it hurt). âFifty-three, bet you never expected to make it that far, huh?â âThatâ putting it mildly,â he responded, but he smiled, and he knew that of all people, Ace felt no discomfort with the cryptic humor. âNow can I go back to sleep, or did you want to sing that insipid birthday song to me?â âActually,â Ace ducked forward to look over Murdocâs shoulder, then back the way that he had come up the stairs to make sure they were alone. âI wanted to give you a little something. Something the rest of the crew might not appreciate too much, if you catch my drift.â âGang stuff?â Murdoc asked, perking up and feeling awake for the first time. âIs it drugs?â âNo!â the younger man snorted. âYou know I donât do that shit no more. Now hold out your hand.â Murdoc agreed, expression suspicious as Ace reached into his back pocket. A moment later, he dropped something cool and heavy into the bassistâs palm. He withdrew his hand and Murdocâs eyes widened in amazement. âBrass knuckles? The Gentle Green Giant owns a pair of brass knuckles?â âOwned. Want you to have âem, boss.â Murdoc slipped them on, impressed at their weight. Heâd never worn a pair before, though heâd known plenty of people in his life whoâd owned them between his drug-filled youth and many days in prison. âYou never used these,â he accused. âSame as your switchblade. Itâs all for show.â âUsed âem exactly once, actually,â he corrected. âBack when I had my crew in Townsville, some junkie came after one of my guys, Lil Arturo. And little Artie was just a kid, see? I had to protect him. I panicked: punched the guy once, twice, saw blood, ran,â he pushed his long black hair behind his ears. âYou know I was never really much of a fighter. But these have been used to protect family, and thatâs why I want you to have âem. After that experience is when I decided to quit the gang shit and pursue music more seriously. And opening for Gorillaz? That was my first official gig that landed me some cash soâz I could turn my life around.â He took a deep breath and pointed at the brass knuckles. âThoseâre significant to me. And all youâve done to let me stay with you guys, even after you came back from the slammer, wellâŚitâs been significant to me tooâŚâ Murdoc could see that Ace was becoming emotional, and though there was a day where he would have laughed at the younger man, he instead placed a hand on his shoulder. âPretty cool gift, I must admit. Not as great as some blow, but itâll do.â âTheyâre not for violence, got it?â Ace looked at him seriously. âTheyâre symbolic. Using those things changed me, set the course of my life in a new direction!â âRight, right, great life changes and all that, got it, Ace,â he looked into the younger manâs eyes. âYouâre uh, youâre all right. For a âguidoâ.â âIâm the one who taught you that word!â Ace snapped, misty eyes suddenly fiery with anger. âYou donât get to call me that! Thatâs practically a slur, you know!â âRight, riiight, if this little heart-to-heart is over,â he replied, âIâm going to go get some breakfast.â âItâs past noon. Thatâs lunch, you stupid old man.â âYouth is wasted on the young,â he replied, but he made sure that Ace saw him slip the brass knuckles into his pocket, a new treasure to keep close at all times. In the kitchen he was greeted first by the strong smell of frying bacon, and then by Russel standing at the stove, spatula in hand. âYouâre normally up earlierân this, Russ,â Murdoc commented, eyeing the sizzling bacon with interest. âEverything all right?â âIâve been up, Muds. This is for you.â âWhat? A man turns fifty-three and suddenly everyone learns how they should have been treating him all along, huh? I quite like this worship.â âDonât push your luck. But thereâs beans in the microwave; get those out and grab a plate.â âRussel, I could kiss you.â âI can smell your breath from over here, man; youâd better not even think about it.â Murdoc cackled and did as he was told, fetching a plate and finding a Pyrex container of baked beans warmed in the microwave for him. As he spooned some onto his plate, Russel came over with the frying pan, offering him several slices of one of his favorite foods. âBon appĂŠtit.â âNow you wouldnât happen to have gone the extra step and madeââ Russel turned back to the countertop and grabbed two mugs of coffee, sliding one over to the bassist. It was his favorite mug no less: one that had been sent to Stu from someone alleging to be his child, a tired âWorldâs Best Dadâ print across it either a deluded or a very ironic statement. Theyâd never determined which. While Stu had begged to throw it out, Murdoc had adopted it with glee, smirking every time the singer glared at him for using it. The drummer had a cup himself as well, and they each took a sip, nodding in approval at the taste. Russel had always been of the philosophy that no one should have to eat a meal alone, so he kept the bassist company as he ate, a comfortable silence falling, interrupted only by the sound of silverware scraping the porcelain plate. âWeâre getting old,â Russel finally said, watching Murdoc push his plate away with finality although he hadnât cleared it. His appetite, which had never been big, was even smaller these days. âYeah, well, not like weâre slowing down,â he countered. âWouldnât dream of it. Not when thereâs still so much left to do. I mean, youâve got that bloody non-profit for immigrant kids who want to learn tambourine or whatever.â He pulled a face. âCrass, Murdoc, very crass. But yeah, I have a lot of work cut out for me with the Kids with Drums foundation. I was also thinking that we still have a lot more music to create.â Murdoc paused, clicking his teeth against the ceramic rim of the mug. It was the first time that Russel had been the one to propose more music. âYou thinking another album, big boy? Gorillaz orâŚsolo?â Russel smiled enigmatically. âIâm thinking skyâs the limit. But hey, I have a lot to do before tonightâs big dinner, so Iâll leave you to your coffee.â He rapped his knuckles against the table and pushed himself up to leave. âOi, Russ?â He paused, mid-stride. âYeah?â Murdoc poked at the remaining beans on his plate with a fork, watching them slide through bacon grease. âYouâre the only one in this bloody house who isnât afraid to fry this shit to a crisp. Well done.â The drummer shook his head. âSee you later, asshole.â Once heâd finished his coffee, the bassist carried his dishes to the sink, looking out the small window and into the backyard. First Ace talking about the past and how heâd changed careers, then Russel being all vague about making new music. It felt like they were giving him subtle warnings of change to come, and the bassist felt apprehension begin to coil in his gut. They were offering clues to him, clues that seemed to suggest change. He wasnât ready to retire yet, and it wasnât until he dropped his mug into the sink, causing a harsh clatter, that he realized his hands had begun to shake. âSnap out of if Niccals,â he muttered. He was jumping to conclusions, that was all. He hoped. He double checked that the mug had not cracked, and, satisfied, left the dirty dishes for someone else to take care of. He made his way to the screen door in the back of their house, hoping a smoke would calm his nerves. Before he could make it outside, a pair of arms wrapped around his middle from behind and he jumped slightly. âHappy birthday, Dad.â âI appreciate the sentiment, luv, but you only call me that about twice a year.â âChristmas and birthdays, right?â The guitarist asked, squeezing him just slightly, reminding him that in spite of her small stature, she was strong enough to snap him in half if she wanted to. âProper submarine daughter you are, popping up to show face then disappearing again for six months. Relax, I havenât written you out of the inheritance yet.â She laughed and turned him around to hug him properly. âYour breath stinks.â âSo Iâve been told,â he said with a shrug. âIf you think Iâm going to brush my teeth on my birthday youâve got another thing coming. Live with it.â She pretended to gag, but grabbed his wrist, placing something small and metal in it with a simple âhereâs your gift.â He looked down to see a house key and again, a wave of nervous energy hit him. âYou changed the locks?â he looked at her. âNoods, what happened? Everything okay?â âI canât tell you all the details; itâs not my story to tell,â she replied, patting his arm. âBut donât worry. I promise youâll be happy when you hear the whole story. Just donât lose this key, okay? I have no patience for you tapping on windows asking me to let you in at four in the morning after a night of revelry.â âThat only happened once or twice!â he cried in indignation. âOnce or twice that you can remember,â she corrected, crossing her arms over her chest. âHappened way more than that. Lucky for you, I forgive you for disturbing my beauty sleep.â âVery generous of you,â he said, pulling out a pack of Lucky Lungs and placing one between his lips, offering her one as well. He really didnât love that she smoked, but he knew there was no stopping Noodle from doing what she wanted to do. âIâm good,â she replied, holding up a hand. âCare for some company, or was this Murdoc Meditation Hour?â âWas actually looking to sort my thoughts out if itâs all the same to you,â he answered, nodding towards the door. No need to risk slipping up and showing the poor girl how unsettled he was on a day that was supposed to be happy. âSeems that everything is starting to change, have you noticed?â âChange doesnât have to be bad, Murdoc. Issun saki wa yami. Youâve got the support: whatever comes your way, it will be kind.â âNo idea what you just said, but it sounds nice. Thanks, pet.â âLooking forward to dinner tonight,â she said brightly, giving him a quick peck on the cheek. âDonât make yourself sick with cancer sticks: the restaurant is supposed to have amazing desserts.â âI donâtââ âDesserts so good even you will like them!â she corrected herself as she headed back upstairs, presumably to find her partner in crime, Ace. Murdoc sighed and headed outside, enjoying the warmth as the sun broke free from the clouds for a moment. He took a seat on one of the aged folding chairs on the patio, lighting his cigarette and trying to control his thoughts. Something was coming, and he was terrified. Even more upsetting than the promise of unwelcome change however was the fact that he hadnât once been able to speak the words he wanted to say. To Ace, to Russel, to Noodle. Theyâd all spent time with him, theyâd all been so kind. This time last year, heâd been certain that his moments of fame had ended. Alone in prison and with no contact from his mates, heâd listened despondently as news came through that Gorillaz were producing a new album without him, and heâd smuggled in enough technology to be able to watch in real time as many fans took to social media, celebrating the bandâs new bassist and suggesting it was a new era for Gorillaz. A better era. Murdoc shuddered at the memory of his cot in prison, of the time spent reflecting on how quickly the world seemed to forget about him. Heâd thought frequently of his father, who had died alone and miserable in his home in Stoke, no one to mourn him, no one to express sympathy for his passing. Heâd been so certain that he was destined for the same fate, and that heâd been delusional to hope for a better outcome. Murdoc stubbed out his first cigarette, having smoked it down in record speed. He lit a new one, eyes fixed on the grass sprouting up between cracks in the patio. Stop it, he willed himself. Stop working yourself up. You have to put on a show for the others in a couple of hours. For the love of Satan get it together! The sound of the screen door shuttering open and closed startled him from his thoughts, and he heard someone approaching him. He recognized the ungainly gait by sound alone instantly and searched his anxiety-rattled brain for a dry comment to make. Stuart beat him to it, singing softly, looking ahead at the backyard rather than at his boyfriend. âWhy you rolling waves over me now, thatâs all I need, dreaming,â¨waiting on a lover, come find me, be forgiven.â Of course. That bloody song. The most overt declaration of love that the singer had ever offered him, the one that had signaled to Murdoc that their relationship was not irreparable. A fucking beacon of hope when heâd been at such a low point in prison. The bassist drew his lower lip between his teeth and stared doggedly ahead, not wanting to break down although he felt his walls crumbling under the soothing sound of his loverâs voice. âIâll be a regular guy for you, I never said Iâd do that,â¨why you looking so beautiful to me now when youâre so sad?â Stu turned to look at him as he sang, and although he still didnât look at the singer, Murdoc felt his eyes grow damp, felt the wetness hanging on his lower lashes, threatening to spill over his cheek. Pathetic. âI will always think about you.â¨Thatâs why Iâm calling you backâ¨on my way through. I wanna stay with you for a long time, I wanna be your stone, love. â¨I wanna see it lay in your eyes when Iâm leaving with your love. I will always think about you.â¨Thatâs why Iâm calling you backâ¨on my way through.â Murdoc sighed, exhaled gray smoke through his nostrils. This man was going to be the death of him, really. He was simply too perfect. âWhy you looking sad to me now, on the day of your birth, luv?â he asked, wording it so he could maintain his cadence. âEnough with the damn singing mate.â He grit out, relieved when his voice didnât crack or waver. âSeriously, answer the question.â Stu replied. âWhat can I say? Your voice is so angelic it moves me to tears every time.â âBullshit,â Stuart reached over and plucked the cigarette from between his fingers, taking a puff for himself. âMuds, you were fine this morning. Whatâs wrong?â The bassist took a deep breath and blinked rapidly until he felt certain he wasnât going to loose any tears. âJust, feel like a lot is happening these days. Between you and me, I think Ace is getting ready to move on from the band.â Stuart handed him back his cigarette and furrowed his brow. âThat makes no sense. Heâs signed a contract to remain a studio musician for us for the next few years. I think heâs happy here. Donât think heâs going to be leaving anytime soon.â The bassist shrugged. âJust a sneaking suspicion. He opened up a bit to me this morning and was being extra nice. And Russel too!â The singer actually snorted at that. âYou think Russ is leaving too? What, he and Ace gonna start a new band?â âMate, I donât know, but he was being all friendly and chatty with me too. The man is up to something. These Americans, I swear to Satan theyâre hard to understand.â âThatâs why you were out here sulking? Youâre afraid weâre all drifting apart?â The younger man took his boyfriendâs hand, laced their fingers together in the way that always made Murdoc melt a little. âI think youâre just assuming the worst.â âEven Noodle was acting off. She gave me a new house key. You know anything about that, by the way? Whyâd she have to have our locks changed?â âShe didnât change the locks on the door.â âThen why this key?!â he snapped, reaching into his pocket and showing it to the singer. Stu looked at it, then looked at his high-strung bandmate. âMuds, why donât you come inside?â he suggested. âSure you donât want to break up with me first, just to keep things fresh?â âDonât joke like that,â he said sternly, standing up and offering his hand out to the older man, who took it, allowing himself to be pulled up and into a hug. âMurdoc, babe. Itâs okay.â âIâm just mental, arenât I?â he asked. âI feel like a bloody spring about to snap and I donât know why!â âI think thereâs reasons why you might be upset,â the singer argued. âYouâve got a lot of bad memories from last summer. We all know how susceptible you are to PTSD. Are you nervous because this time last year you were alone?â The connection made perfect sense as soon as the singer said it, and Murdoc felt like an ass instantly. âThatâs it!â he practically shouted at the poor singer. âThatâs why Iâve been so off. My brain is doing that fucking thing that it does. Shit, Iâm such a mess!â âHey, Iâve told you to be kinder to yourself,â the taller man chastised. He had a habit of talking like a therapist sometimes, the result of all the therapy sessions heâd attended. At first it had been annoying, but sometimes Murdoc secretly felt safe in the knowledge that Stu could help him navigate his mind a little bit. âYouâre not a mess. Youâve had a tough year. Thatâs part of why weâre going to celebrate tonight,â he paused to kiss Murdoc with no warning, and the bassist gasped against his mouth in shock. âGonna spoil you rotten,â he promised gently. âIâŚâ Emotion was flooding through Murdocâs system once again, but this time, he didnât feel as panicked. He needed to speak, needed to say what heâd been meaning to say all day. âOi, old man,â Stu interrupted him, âhave I told you today that I love you? Because I do, you know. More and more every day.â âThank you,â Murdoc garbled. It was somewhere between a prayer and a sob. âThank you, Stu.â âOf course,â he murmured, stroking the older manâs bangs out of his eyes. âMurdoc. Letâs go inside now, okay?â The bassist allowed himself to be led back inside, his hand gripping the singerâs so tight it had to hurt a little, but Stu didnât complain. In the living room, he found the other three, Noodle and Ace both splayed out on the couch, occasionally holding up their phones to show the other memes. Russel sat back in his recliner, smiling when the two came in. âThereâs the birthday boy.â âAll hail,â Ace commented without looking up from his phone. âHar har,â Murdoc responded. âSo letâs cut to the chase: is it terminal? Will I live, doctors?â He tried to keep his voice light as he joked, but his hands had begun to shake again, and he could feel Stuâs fingers tighten around his even more, a silent Iâm here. âYeah, weâve got a big surprise for you,â Noodle said, sitting up straight. âIn case you were too dumb to figure it out, the key I gave you isnât for this house.â âItâs for our new one,â Stu said, letting go of Murdocâs hand so he could instead wrap an arm around his shoulders, pulling him close. âOur what now?â âRumor has it that back around 2007, Kong Studios burned down under âmysterious circumstances,ââ Russel said. âAnd knowing a thing or two about criminal activity, I can confirm that thatâs code for arson,â Ace quipped. âYou cashed in on the insurance money and produced an album,â Noodle continued coolly, and Murdoc tensed at the allusion to Plastic Beach. âAnd due to its history of zombie invasions, shitty weather, and a whole lot of burned garbage left after Kong was melted down, local governance has had an unbelievably hard time selling that chunk of land that you abandoned.â âSo recently, I had this idea, and I think youâre smart enough to fill in the rest.â Stu finished, pressing a kiss to his temple. Everything clicked, and a shiver of excitement ran up Murdocâs spine. âYou mean to tell me youâve bought the property? The hill in Essex? Itâs ours?â âOh Murdoc, donât sell me short,â the singer said with a pout. âNot just the land. I spoke to EMI. Well, they want me to call them Parlophone, but itâs EMI, right? They wouldnât grant me a pence without some sort of contract, so Iâve agreed to their terms. Something in the ballpark of six tours and two albums over the next eight years or something. Pretty manageable by our standards, frankly. Some merch, here and there. Iâll leave that up mostly to Noodle and Ace since they know what the kids like.â âEMI gave us money for this?â Murdoc clarified, feeling dizzy with the news. âMurdoc, darling, theyâve built us a new studio,â he said gently. âWeâre going back to England, and weâre going to do amazing things there.â âThat key I gave you,â Noodle said. âItâs for our new home. Just like at Kong. Itâll be our living space as well as our music space. We need to make up for the year we lost without you and El Diablo.â âHoly shitâŚâ he reached into his pocket for his Lucky Lungs, only to realize that heâd left them in the backyard. With nothing for his hands to do he could only tremble, too overwhelmed to meet his bandmatesâ eyes. âThis is too good to be true.â âItâs true,â Stu promised, hugging him tight, doing all he could to comfort him physically. âHappy Birthday, Murdoc. Ready to start the next phase of our lives together?â âY-yeah, alright,â he agreed, voice watery. âWeâre going to get it right this time,â the singer assured. âWeâre gonna go back to where it all began.â âWeâre ready to crash the music scene with you once again, boss,â Ace promised. âIâll be there to help out, but this band needs their number one bassist back.â âThe goal is to move back by the end of the summer as long as youâre okay with it,â Russel explained. âThat way you have time to pack and say goodbyes. And maybe start writing down new ideas so we can hit the ground running.â âAre you happy?â Noodle asked, seeing the bassistâs tense body language. âYes,â he said quickly. âI think heâs a little overwhelmed,â Stu explained, stroking the older manâs hair. âGive us a minute?â âWe were here firstââ Ace started, but Noodle smacked his arm and they both rose to leave the house. âFine, fine! Weâll go. By the way, check out Twitter and Insta, Muds. Hundreds of hits from fans drawing you in your skivvies with cake. Itâs hilarious!â âWeâll be back in a few hours to get ready for the dinner reservation,â Noodle promised, shoving the American out the front door and blowing a kiss. âIâm gonna take a walk around the block,â Russel said, patting the bassistâs shoulder as he passed them. âStart mentally preparing to say goodbye to America again.â The front door clattered and the two were left alone, Stuâs hand still smoothing the bassistâs hair as Murdoc took deep breaths to keep himself calm. âToo much?â The singer asked once he was sure they had privacy. âNo! This isâŚthis was allâŚâ Murdoc waved his hands, lost for words. âI canât understand why you lot would do all this for me.â âI mean, itâs really for the whole band,â Stu reasoned. âWe wanted it to be a surprise for you though. Because youâre a vital part of the band, and we want you to know that. I know you doubted it, even if you donât ever admit that out loud. I hope this proves how serious we are about keeping you in Gorillaz, Muds. The reason they were all so nice to you on your birthdayâŚitâs because they all care about you, same as me.â The older man smiled up at him. âI guess I should have thought of that,â he admitted quietly. âBut! I canât believe we get to go back to the place that started it all. Out of the ashes, Gorillaz will rise again like a bloody phoenix!â âLike from Harry Potter?â He was able to laugh now, leaning up to kiss Stu in all his quirky glory. âIâm ready to start again, do it right this time. With my soul mate.â The singerâs cheeks turned pink instantly. âI love when you call me that.â âYeah,â he stole another kiss. âI know.â âHey, give me one more! That was too fast!â So Murdoc smiled, wrapping his arms around the singerâs waist and pulling him in for a slower, deeper kiss. âItâs like the song goes,â Stu whispered, arms wrapping around the bassistâs shoulders. âIâm calling you back.â âBut what came first, your grand plan to rebuild Kong, or Souk Eye?â They both laughed, giddy with the prospect of a fresh start, of more music. Of more time to learn to say the things theyâd been feeling for many, many years.