#22nd post

“the best thing to happen this year”

hello!! i can’t believe i’m on the twenty-second post!!!!! GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!

it’s just so-

i’m just-

i’m so very hAPPYYY!!!

i’m about to finish this thing and i am so proud!!

okay, so the best thing to happen to me this year is going to the gym. i know, it’s trivial, nothing to be proud of or celebrate.

but to me, it’s a big accomplishment.

going to the gym something i thought i could never do because of my anxiety.

i thought that if i were to go to a gym, all the fit people would just be staring at me, laughing and making fun of me cause “the fat girl’s trying too hard” or that i would never be able to belong to a place where people work out and tone their already lean bodies. but actually going to the gym proved me wrong. it was a great experience.

the trainers were nice and did not comment at all on my physique, they made me feel welcome and they went straight on to training us like they’re supposed to instead of chatting or making fun of the way you do the exercises wrong.

they also ask if we’re dizzy from time to time, making sure they’re not working us too hard.

that made me feel a lot better about going, and it made my anxiety shut up about it. it made me feel this sense of control over it, and over my decisions as well.

also, going to the gym kind of solidifies my decision to take better care of my health and fitness.

back then i’d just say i’d work out and actually do it for a couple of weeks then give up.

this makes the idea of being healthy more concrete and tangible for me, and i love it.

i want to thank my virgo baby @theofficialsophiaerika for bringing me there and having my back when i start to have doubts. love ya!

so yep, that’s all i have to say.

          When I was little, I liked to spin around in circles. I did this because; if I did it fast enough, I could see into another dimension. A dimension that was like my own, but had terrors and horrors that the people of that world could not see.

Made fish today, and was pretty cross about it. 

However, everyone approves except Mom. Said it was too cai and too tanh. Hmm..wait how do those two go together? xD The spicyness usually gets the smelliness away...

Oh well. 

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I think visual art, music, and occasional game design is a good start. I don't normally post twice but I thought this was fabulous. It's definitely my kind of "thing". You know, babes galore. Anyways, art by MinjaeLee. If I had the money i would honestly consider ordering a print out, it says it's a reproduction on canvas which is extremely cool. A part of me would rather learn how to art like that though. "Buying" art is I suppose cool, but I'm on the edge at the moment. I really really want to do more traditional art. I think I would enjoy that, at least a part of me thinks so. 

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One day...