#21st year

Instagram: johnp.shanley

HAPPY UNDERPANNIVERSARY, EVERYONE!!!!

Okay, so. For all of 2019 I have been moving, starting, and ending. It has been packed with hellos and goodbyes. This year I will be living in 4 different places and for 3 months each. I had no idea what would happen or if any of it would work-- I still don’t. But, hopefully, this will help me keep my head on straight. January: The main goal of January was to get a really basic job and make as much money as possible. So, I became a nanny and when I wasn’t chasing 3 boys around, I was slicing meat at the local deli. It was long, jam-packed days and every once and a while I would pick up extra odd jobs. It was good and chaotic but I made the money I had to and felt really good about the chaos I was making for myself-- I even got bangs. But unfortunately, I also got my car stuck more times than I could remember and I also joined a gym. 3 weeks into this chaotic business I ended up getting SO sick that I had to take a week off of everything and quit my gym.  February: The second day of the month I ended up crashing my car into a snowbank with my boyfriend in the car. It was so icy and terrible but we dealt with it. This was the last month before I left so naturally there was a tone of fighting with friends, family, and loved ones. It was filled with long car rides, confusing conversations, and really tough decisions. I had to quit all of my jobs, pack myself into a suitcase, and say goodbye to the cozy life I had built myself.  I spent a lot of time at school soaking in as much time with everyone before we all left. Plus, I drove my mom to Maine to visit my grandmother and the rest of our family. It was chaotic but a great 48 hours. 

March: I flew to Norway and started settling in. I listened to a lot of music, podcasts, and journaled SO much. I struggled with cultural differences and basic Norwegian mannerisms. I felt like an outsider for most of the month and had so much stress pumping through me every single day. I really wished that I had another person to share the trip with. It just felt silly to travel off of the farm and into Oslo or Kolbotn because it was so scary to leave. I constantly had nightmares that I would go somewhere and be unable to get back. It was and is so frustrating. I still have no idea how to get through that, but I’m working on it. For the rest of the month, I am hoping to work out the WB essays, confirm my summer jobs with HVS, and finish the outline for my self-design major. 

April: April will be so busy! I plan to have a chaotic time helping sheep bring their baby lambs into the world. I’ll move into a new house and live with 2 girls from Sweden. I’ll spend more time on the right sleep schedule. I’ll go to a concert with the family and get my shit together. I’ll apply to work as a CA at school and hopefully get it. I want to start running more and have a routine that feels normal and something I can control. 

May: My birthday month and a yea of being concussion free-- lots to celebrate! I’ll be wrapping up with lambing season. I’ll celebrate Norwegian independence day and at some point, I hope to take a train to Trondheim and stay with the families cousins. I might even go to Amsterdam to see an old friend. I’ll pack up all my things, thank the family, buy cool souvenirs, and fly home. I might have a breakdown moment and cut my hair or get something pierced. 

June: This is where it gets complicated. Hopefully at this point, I will be working for HVS and be moving to NY. I’ll have a beautiful homecoming with friends, family, and B. I’ll see my grandmother! I’ll celebrate Laga’s 100th year and hopefully attend a few weddings. I might even buy a car while I’m at it. I’m hoping to get my hair cut nice and short for summer and then depending on where I am and what my income is I’ll get a few more piercings. I’ll teach kids everything that I can and get a killer tan and too many bugbites. 

July: Hopefully, my cousin will have her baby and we will welcome in a new family member. I’ll get ready for school and learn as much as I can about agricultural education. I’ll spend time with Serena and Carleigh and hopefully Brennan isn’t too busy with school either. I also want to get my laptop fixed so that I can have a full unit instead of a big flappy thing.

August: I’ll finsih up at HVS or wherever I am, I’ll move back to VT and if I have a car I’ll get a job in Morrisville or Hardwick. I’ll work my ass off in classes and as a CA to make sure everything is perfect. I’ll get my van certification and hopefully travel to Canada with school. I’ll go through all of my belongings and get rid of what I don’t need-- cause soon everything will be moved into a tiny apartment and I need to let things go as I get older.

September: I’ll probably have 2 or 3 breakdowns adjusting to school. I’ll celebrate moms birthday. And I’ll put the finishing touches on my self-design major and I’ll get it approved. I’ll move into my room and if I have a car I’ll finish setting up my gym membership in town. I’ll set up weekly meetings with my advisor and have the most organized lifestyle I have had in a really long time.  October: I’ll fly to Kentucky to see Brennan over break, I’ll go as Edna for halloween and I’ll kick ass on Midterms. I’ll get my self-design major approved and start working on my SYRP and talking with Hochelaga to confirm summer employment and kick butt. I’ll probably dye my hair black around this time too but not because I’m sad, just because I want to.

November: Thanksgiving time! I’ll either spend it in VT or NH, either way I’m sure it will be great. I think we could even do both families if we wanted to. As in marathon it, not as in join families, people may have strokes.