#2011 lore

A few months before, after I had won the school spelling bee, my mom said she'd buy me the game if I also won the science fair. The previous year, I had won second place to this hoity-toity chick that always thought she was better than everyone else and sucked up to administration. Her dad was the school resource officer. And, news flash, they helped her with her projects every year. (My mom learned this at the PTA.)

This bitch and my mother both deeply underestimated my resolve - I had a crush on N.

I built a marble race out of PVC, clear tubing, 500mph aircraft tape stolen from Delta Air Lines, a rainbow xylophone, and Blizzard hair (he was helping my tape not stick to the PVC). It was about 6-7 feet tall and had to be driven to school in my dad's pickup. I had to stand on a step ladder to insert the marbles.

The project was simple: How does the material of the marble affect its speed & velocity? (I had a glass marble, a wooden bingo ball, and a steel ball bearing. All the same size.)

The message was simple: KISS MY ASS.

I tied for first place, not with her, but another kid who did a project about crickets... (I think it was something like their chirp frequency?)

But best of all, our dear friend learned that she was NOT better than everyone else when she got second place. In fact, she got so upset that she fucking cried.

I had no sympathy for her and my mom didn't either. She drove my ass to Gamestop and we preordered Pokemon Black for $52.