“Having autism and hyperfixations is so silly goober I wish I had it :D” No you don’t, you REALLY don’t.
(TW: Mention of School Sh**t!ng, My IRL Trauma, Venting. People in the true crime community that obsess over these killers and romanticize these tragedies PLEASE DNI. LEAVE MY PAGE.)
Dude I do not have control of what I fixate on. I sometimes will fixate on the school sh**t!ng I was a survivor of and I hate it because I want to just forget about it and be rid of it, but it happened at my own high school I was only 15 when it happened.
NO it’s not because I want to do what that monster did, the fact the monster is still ALIVE right now sickens me. It actually makes my blood boil. Sh**t!ngs in general are scary to me, I don’t feel safe when I’m in large places with a huge amount of people anymore not even WORK sometimes. One time when the power suddenly went off, I panicked and got scared even though it turned out to not be intentional and nothing happened.
No, I think it’s to cope with the trauma of it happening. I remember when it ended up making history as one of the deadliest sh**t!ngs in US history, like with Columbine and Sandy Hook, It was and I think still is one of the scariest parts of the tragedy still to this day. Parkland isn’t a scary city, it’s actually pretty, peaceful and welcoming. But an unholy demon HAD to destroy that, along with the 17 families the demon also tore apart.
I don’t know, the frustration of constantly remembering and thinking about that day is something I’ve been wanting to talk about and get off my chest recently and it’s not easy to do that because of how sensitive the subject is. But I did want to bring it up because I also wanted to spread awareness. “it’s been 7 years bro, let go of the past. The perpetrator was already sentenced back in 2022” hate to be a downer, but it’s STILL just as big of a problem in the US as it was back in 2018, hell even BEFORE that! Columbine, Virginia Tech, Sandy Hook. Like this is not funny, MSD was just ONE of them.
After MSD, we’ve had tragedies like Santa Fe Highschool only MONTHS after MSD, Oxford High School in 2021, Uvalde Elementary in 2022, Presbyterian Church, University of Nevada and Michigan State in 2023, and even Apalachee High School, Joppatowne High School and Abundant Life Christian School as recently as LAST YEAR. So no, we’ve barely done anything to change how gun laws work in the US so schools are safer.
I honestly think we’ve even encouraged others to follow in their footsteps. This year, a kid in Indiana that was obsessed with the demon that caused my school’s sh**ting planned to sh**t up their own school on February 14th 2025, dubbing it “Parkland Part 2”. Thankfully, the kid was arrested before that could happen but that was NOT something I or other survivors and victims were hoping to hear that day. That doesn’t change the fact that we have young people right now on the internet, even on TUMBLR, that romanticize and obsess over these monsters and that’s not okay. We need to take better steps like this where we can intervene before it’s too late. We weren’t able to have that happen with MSD unfortunately even after the police were warned, but I am glad this incident this year was thankfully intervened and nothing came of their plans.
If anyone is reading this that is a sh**t!ng victim or a survivor or you know someone that was, I want you to know that you are not alone. It may look tough right now, but we have to keep fighting for our schools and our children’s protection. We may not know how many times we have to say “Never Again” before it actually never happens again but we have to keep praying, taking action and spreading awareness so we can see even a fraction of change become a reality.
I graduated in 2020, but even now I will always be positive, passionate, and proud to be an eagle. It’s been 7 years, yet we are still MSDStrong. 🦅🩶❤️
