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The L Train at 14th Street, Richard Estes, 2015
Oil on board 16 x 12 in. (40.64 x 30.48 cm)
for the past few years iāve had a personal rule that i do not sign anything i havenāt read - mostly because i genuinely think itās a good idea, but also as a kind of social experiment - and i wanna share some observations
when i worked at an amusement park, i was one of like two or three people in a group of around twenty young adults who read the employment contract
i gave up on reading every TOS and privacy policy early on - now i only read them if itās a website or company iāll be giving personal information to (and even then i only skim them) - but iāve never found anything super suspect in one
i also have an exception for when iām made to feel like iād be an asshole for stopping to read something. notable examples of this going into effect include the patient-intake paperwork at the ER when i went in a few months ago. (i really wish iād just gone ahead and been the asshole in that situation, even though i have no reason to think there was anything bad in it)
i think the only time i was the only one to read something that the people who gave it to us actually wanted us to read was the waiver at a cat café, which included a lot of safety information about how to interact with the cats
one time i was approached by a guy with a petition who told me it was an anti-fracking petition (which was a real petition that was going around at the time), but the paper he handed me was a petition to instate aĀ ācitizenship requirementā for voting. i pointed this out to him and he tried to convince me that even though thatās what it said, itās not really what my signature meant, and then named the university he graduated from as though it gave him some level of extra credibility??
i have more than once been given a HIPPA form at a doctorās office where my signature certifies that iāve been offered a copy of their privacy practices, when i had not, in fact, been offered a copy of their privacy practices. the last time this happened, the receptionist didnāt actually haveĀ a copy of their privacy practices, and had to get me to me sign it several days later once she got a copy from her manager
99% of people are very accommodating when you tell themĀ āi want to read this before i sign it,ā but itās neverĀ what theyāre expecting
on a related note, if someone thinks itās important that you know whatās in something theyāre giving you to sign,Ā they wonāt wait for you to read it - theyāll go through, point to each section, and tell you what it says. this is what happened when i signed my lease, and itās actually a pretty common instance of using my asshole exception, because then i feel like iām calling the person a liar if i stop to read it myself
the moral of the story is... like... we treat a signature like itās the absolute most surefire way of sayingĀ āyes i understand this and agree to it,ā but in practice thereās not even a pretense that a signature means youāve READ whatever youāre signing.Ā in fact, handing someone a piece of paper and sayingĀ āsign hereā is one of the LEAST effective ways to make sure they understand and agree to something, and PEOPLE KNOW THIS, and we do it ANYWAY because what else are we gonna do? notarize it??
i donāt have a solution but like. thatās kinda fucked up, you know?
It's okay to dislike being touched. It does not matter if they're your parents, siblings, friends, caretakers, family members, or anyone else. You are allowed to uphold your boundaries.
Hi this is one of my favorite pictures of Pikachu ever

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Rose, Fritz Nobis, London, Irving Penn, 1970
lilā kim - mtv vmaās (1999)