i think i've gotten used to work! i'm a little more comfortable and received a few shout outs on my work ethic which i appreciate.

not my ex hating my cole tattoo because it's another man tatted on me? the tattoo is done poorly and it's literally an outline of his head and hair from like.. 9 years ago lmao after we broke up he dead had the nerve to say "yeah i like j cole now" ?????????? little dick energy fr, meanwhile, the guy i like has a cole acronym tatted on his arm (i was going to get it tatted but never got around to it) and we took a picture of our tattoos together and talked about how much we love j. cole and how his music inspires us to be better people. (my ex asked me why would i say i love j. cole and i was like i mean it in the way that i love what his music does for me, how it makes me feel, the way he writes and tells a story, not in the way that i want to fuck him) he didn't care. i can't wait to get this damn signature tattoo covered up, i didn't want to honestly but the way i need to stop being the only one who cares!!!! (and not me and my crush getting wine drunk and he asked me "would you ever get someone's name tatted" and i was like "ummmmm hello!" and he was like "i was trying to figure out what that meant" and we laughed and he was like "yeah you def gotta cover that up and do mine") lmao i love how opposite they are emotionally because i need a lover boy heavyyyyyyyy like YES BE ALL ABOUT ME AND DONT THINK ABOUT IT FOR THE NEXT FUCKING 8 YEARS !!!!!!!!!

2. omg i just thought about this man waiting til after we broke up to say "and there were women who were telling me they were waiting on him to be single" like??????? when men were telling me that shit i would tell him cause i thought it was hilarious but whole time he had people saying this to him and never thought to share???? why did he keep so much shit to himself and wait til after we broke up to express his feelings???? why is he so emotionally underdeveloped omfg.. i asked one thing of him and that was to not tell me things after the fact!!!!!!!! cause he literally waited like 3 months to tell me the other half of the story of his roommate trying to fuck him where he said "im not gonna lie her pu$$y was wet" HOW WOULD U KNOW???????? did i get cheated on bro???? bUT HE LEFT ME CAUSE IM FUCKING GORGEOUS lol k

3. oooffff how about him and i sharing porn with each other, well honestly, i think i shared some things i've watched maybe once or twice, but i've seen on more than numerous occasions what he was into and it never bothered me- until i also just remembered that my sexuality was a big factor in our breakup and the only reason i was oozing sexy vibes was because he stopped having sex with me on the regular like we did! and when we talked about it he made it seem like i was obsessed with sex or only liked him for his dick which is crazy cause i liked him before i ever fucked him, i loved him before any of that, it just grew into a bigger love and became romantic. he was the one who always tried to have sex when we were friends.. he's the one that used to send me videos of him fucking a different woman every night... he's the one that initiated a threesome between us.... he's the one that continued to follow women that he fucked and only told me about it bc i was going somewhere they would be at.... i'm not upset or bothered actually just finding myself having little realizations here and there about how much more i loved that man than he ever claimed to love me. and i know this because i put up with SO much BEFORE us ever getting together thinking "this really fucking hurts right now but it'll be worth it because one day you'll be together" and THAT was actually delusional. not saying i was perfect but aside from me going crazy ONE night, LOL, i never put him through the ringer of [making him feel like i was finally ready to be with him and then go and tell him i actually might be getting into a relationship.. with someone else... even though i told him many times it's not for me right now.......... and then when i let him know a year later that i'm actually forreal forreal ready and i want to be exclusive... he finds out i'm still fucking other men... that i had just met the week AFTER telling him i want to be together].......... LOL yeah, i was suuuuuuuuuuch a dumb bitch for this guy like the least he coulda did was buy me something nice! asking to go out to dinner was just too much omg ???? how you say you're my best friend and don't know i'm literally okay with some cheap snacks and wine in the park???? idc just wanted to spend time and NOT ONLY when it came to his god damn music.... i literally slept on an air mattress that constantly deflated annnnddddd a twin size (he is 6'2 i am 5'8) where i basically cuddled the wall AND DINNER WAS TOO MUCH??????? yall????

4. he complained about money as if i didn't have a job too???? but me offering to pay didn't sit right with him so i honestly stopped but he never shared with me his true thoughts about it like i said he kept a lot to himself, how tf am i supposed to be the best partner i can be if u dont fucking tell me anything??????

5. when he talked about moving into a new place it was "his place"... we were dating for almost TWO YEARS but we couldn't live together because according to him it was smarter for us to live separately............................... i'm shocked i didn't accuse him of cheating on me right there because bitch what???? i was at his place all the time with ROOMMATES so u getting ur own spot isnt an invitation for me to move in?????? i can pay bills??? but again goes back to the whole "keeps everything to himself" he could talk about his skeptical thoughts on irrelevant shit for 4 hours straight but the real life shit? LOL K