#061816

you know, it sucks feeling like you're not good enough. to know that everything you do is inadequate. to feel like you are not worth everything in the world plus more. because as my stomach sinks into itself, as I hear the news of the other girl. I can't help but think "it can never be me." as I sit in my bed, and try to be happy for you, everything hurts. I didn't expect myself to be so upset. I didn't expect real tears to fall from my eyes, because everyone knows I'm not capable of actual emotion for longer than 5 minutes. because God forbid, I have feelings for someone or something. or anything really. as I try to play it off as "okay," I just feel like an idiot. I mean you had no idea, no of course not. nor will you ever have an idea. but as I've had to explain the way I feel about my inadequacy, I can't help but wonder "why can't it be me?" it's never me.

061716 // Bago makauwi ang auntie ko dito sa Pilipinas, dapat nabilhan ko na ng charger ang netbook ko bago pa ko masermunan. So, I decided to bring with me my netbook para maipacheck ko kung anong problema; ang battery ba o ang charger. Unluckily, when I went to the store kung saan namin binili ang netbook ko, under renovation sila kaya medyo nanlumo ako kung anong gagawin ko para makabili o maipacheck man lang 'to. Nag-isip ako habang naglalakad kung anong pwede kong gawin. i went to different stores to ask. Good thing they suggested me ideas kung anong pwede kong gawin. I was also able to find a store na nagtitinda ng iba't ibang klase ng charger. All I have to do is to go back with enough money. Ang mahal ng charger bes.

Going home, I rode a bus para di na ko bababa pa at lilipat ng jeep. I bought chicken sandwich at Mcdo dahil gutom na gutom na rin ako, which became a bad move because I tend to vomit during long hours of travel. Napaka-congested ng bus kaya sobrang nahirapan akong huminga.