#04x03

bbc merlin - 04x03 The Wicked Day

(bc he was in the walk-in)

As I mentioned before, walk-in Carmy doesn´t count.

So, it´s great that he came to the WRONG conclusions: about his career and about how C was the one he loved at some point, the person he had been transferring and sublimating all his love for Syd bc he thought Syd was outta his league and didn´t wanna risk to fuck it all up with her, as he usually does bc there´s always a shoe dropping when it comes to him. But at this point, he´s not even sure how long that lasted. Sugar helped him realize that it´s not important that it ended, but that it happened to begin with:

04x02 | Souboise

But he got it all backwards!

IMO the whole idea of having to change to stop missing out on love, whether that love meant family´s, for not even meeting his niece, or not having been there for his sister when she had a baby, or love in the form of a romantic relationship with C or anyone else for that matter, started to form in his head IN THE FREEZER and he immediately related it to the C person bc C person and freezer are like potato, potato at this point LOL in his head (and Storer´s).

So, in the next ep, after he tasted Syd´s "better than perfect CUNT, scallop", standing BY THE FRIDGE AGAIN, WITH HIS HAND ON THE HANDLE:

04x03 | Scallop

He was HAUNTED again, by C. (the witch of Groundhog day who put a curse on him while he was in the fucking freezer).

BC C is the fridge in his head, his subconscious associates that place with this traumatic event he wants to put behind him once and for all, and that he, up until the "apology," still felt guilty about and stuck on.

*Side note: THAT FRIDGE IS CURSED, THAT´S WHY IT´S HAUNTING, AND SHOULD BE EXORCIZED, BURNED DOWN TO ASHES OR SOMETHING, AND I´M SURE STORER HAS SOMETHING LIKE THAT UP HIS SLEEVE FOR S5. THAT FRIDGE CAN´T FUCKING BE THERE ANYMORE. IF STORER DOESN´T DESTROY IT, I´LL SHOW UP ON SET WITH A HAMMER! WHO´S WITH ME?!

So <hand in the handle, standing by the cursed fridge, C came to mind> He was like: "I gotta apologize to C rn! I can´t keep on postponing it like I postponed visiting my sister and doing the right thing.", "I gotta start straightening things up in my life, but for that, I gotta apologize first."

So he ran to the C person (who technically was in the same location on set as Syd´s apartment bc they use the same stoop for everything, apparently, so I was right, he was running to Syd´s apartment, but it was just a location coincidence to save some $ in production, bc ofc, FML, thank you, Sadist!) And the rest is history:

*ALSO HE MISSED THE FUCKING STOP SIGN! GO FUCK YOURSELF, CARMY!

He apologized the best he could and told her in past tense he loved her, which is great, also told her he didn´t really love her but what he actually loved was how she made him feel, and that´s not love, that´s lemerence, self-centered satisfaction, nothing to do with loving someone else and I covered that HERE.

BUT he got it all backwards, that´s my point! BC HE WAS IN THE FREEZER and freezer Carmy sucks, he´s the Bear, not THE GUY.

The idea that started forming in his head during that call in the freezer in 04x02, was that he was burnt out and wanted to quit:

So he did:

"Today is tomorrow" means: "The Future is now".

And "The Future is now" means THIS.

And Storer wanted to pinpoint the difference between how Richie takes the same pressure as Carmy, yet for him is not a reason to quit, but the only thing he´s still holding onto:

Richie got it right. As usual. (that´s why he´s my favest ;).(not to mention that bc of his fake Devry snow and Syd´s scallop, they´re getting a star, not bc of Carm lolol!)

So, the takeaway he shoulda gotten from Sugar´s words was: It´s OK to stop loving C, and move on, if that´s what you feel, what´s important is that this proves you are capable of love.

Well, this himbo got it all wrong:

So, that was the beginning of the end, but THIS WAS THE LAST STRAW. (04x05 | Replicants)

So, basically, what I´m saying is: he got to the wrong conclusion, and thought that the best thing to do was to "retire" to put Syd the restaurant first, but what he shoulda gathered from what Sugar said was:

Don´t let what you loved and lost stop you from loving now and again. Love changes, but still counts, and that´s OK.

Meaning, don´t let what happened, whatever that is, stop you from moving on and trying again, loving again.

Sugar is the most underestimated character of the show, but when it comes to love and healing, she´s THE GUY.

#teamSugar.

Remember to follow my tag #Gingerpovs 💋