#04252015

Woke up to a message from Anthony (from Chicago). We never officially met, but I think I loved him. He was the first guy who took the time to get to know me. Who challenged me. Who recognized how hard it is for me to talk about my feelings, but kept trying to get it out of me.

I told him I loved him. I do believe I meant it at that the time. This was back in 2013. Probably just under 2 years ago when we first met online. It was such a weird experience. Emotionally I was attached to him. But physically, I was seeing other people. Things ended because I let him go. He was dragging me down. Always threatening he wanted to die if he couldn’t be with me. Got jealous if I even mentioned a guy, even as a friend. I had enough.

We chatted for a bit this morning. According to him, he still loves me. He then posted something which I know was directed to me. I’d be lying if I said it didn’t give me butterflies.

I know nothing will progress with him. I know I don’t want to be with him. But the selfish me wants the attention he used to give me. Made me feel like the most beautiful girl in the world.

MEME: “mutuals, send me #’s so I can make a post about you”

You’re one of those RPers who writes their characters dialog so well, that I forget that their thread content is NOT actual canon parts to the series XD.

You make the character you play so convincing even in AUs and Xovers.

The Theater adeptation with Grey McFace as your muse nearly killed me.