Summary: Based on SAINW, Raphael reunites with his wife after his long lost brother comes into his life, forcing him to reunite with his brothers and reignite his faith on taking out the Shredder!
Tags: SAINW based injuries (mentioned), canon character deaths (allusion to), angst, guilt, family separation, marriage, hurt and comfort
A/N: this is based on pre-existing ideas/chapters that I'll try to upload here
Raphael huffed. His good eye frantically moving from one spot to the next, acting out the mess of thoughts in his old thick head.
"Ya gon' break a wall, big guy?"
A pleasant fluttering ran down his spine at the voice.
The woman moved in closer, eyes scanning the debris and fallen beams.
"Figured the city was shut enough as it is but-" she eyed him - "if it gets ya-"
"Alright", he interrupted.
The second his eye landed on her everything quiet down. The tiny smirk on her face reminded him of better days. Of younger days. God, he loved that cocky smirk of hers.
He couldn't help but chuckle under his breath, "Alright, sweetheart. No need to go there."
She was already there, in front of him, by his side, like it should be. Hands holding his bruised forearms, feet in between his, chest against his broken plastron. She leaned in. Head brushing his, he could feel the warmth of her breath tickle the skin of his neck.
Raphael leaned in. His bandaged hands held her back, then wrapped around her waist to pull her closer. Temple leaning against her hair, he felt her hands caress his shell then come around to hold him by his shoulders. She nustled against him and Raphael reciprocated. Her warmth, the peace she carried within that enveloped him, her softness... A small churring reverbated out of the old turtle as he pushed his snout deeper into her sweet neck.
Luciana chuckled softly. What a big baby. Her baby. Her softie.
Pulling away just to cup her face, a tired eye scanned her aging face.
There was grime and dirt, some old scrapes, and the ghost of a bruise on the edge of her hairline.
"Y'okay?" His tone was serious but caring.
She nodded against his touch. A loving smile etched on her face at the worry of her beloved husband. "'m fine, Raph."
"Good."
The turtle sighed heavily and with it, it appeared all weight he carried within himself pulled him down. Curling into himself, he started to go down as he exhaled. His hand never let go of hers.
The woman followed him.
The broken concrete under his cracked shell, scrapping at his leathery thighs felt welcoming against his aching muscles. It's coldness was grounding and provided the overused muscle with some relief.
She kneeled down, thumb rubbing over his scarred knuckles and maintaining her focus on him. With a soft pat to his left knee, she smiled at the turtle she had given her heart to all those decades ago.
"I missed you"
Even with one eye, Raphael couldn't miss the sadness in her baggage eyes. Her confession pulled at the strings of his old clicker, and it thumped like it hadn't since the last time he'd seen her (from afar as he dropped a box of supplies at April's camp and he caught the ghost of her silhouette disappearing behind a dirty curtain).
He sighed heavily, "I missed you."
His plastron grew heavier the longer he looked into those chocolate eyes. "So damn much."
She blinked the tears forming in her eyes. There was no time for some chic-flic moment.
He breathed in but it sounded so estranged, like he was choking. "Fuck, baby, I missed ya so damn much." His hands immediately seeked her.
The dry skin of his head felt cool against her warm skin.
She could feel the shake of his hands on her face. The trembling of his breath against her temple after he pulled her closer. She could feel the tug of her heart to his.
Softly, she moved her hands. First, giving his calloused palms a comforting squeeze. Then, past his arms to wrap around his neck.
She leaned in, cheek against the top of his head. Her heart felt heavy at the brush of each trembling breath he took against her chest. His fingers gripping unto her old jacket as he clung to her.
" 'm okay Raph. I ain't leaving you... You should know that by now."
The underlying statement in her words made a new wave of guilt and regret tighten his plastron.
How could he ever explain that he had never wanted to leave? Not leave her. But it all... After what had happened, it all...
He needed to breathe. Leo was driving him crazy and after Case- fuck, he just needed to breathe. He needed his space. Away from Leo and his fucking wisdom. Away from his "thought-out" plans and his pep talks. He was tired of it. He was tired of losing and getting his shell kicked. He was tired of getting bruised and battered for nothing, of "missing their widow" , and running out of supplies. He was tired of losing people. After- after all they'd lost, after everyone they'd lost... That mission, that was the final straw. He couldn't follow Leo after what his decisions had cost them, had cost April... had cost Mikey!
"Lu, I-"
"It's fine."
"No, it ain't." He answered as fast as she had, his voice was just more strict. "It wasn't fucking right and ya know it!"
She hung her head at that and Raphael felt his plastron crack at how tired she looked.
"I was a coward-"
Eyes wide open, she immediately lifter her head "Raph!"
"I was! It's true. I should've talked to ya. Shell, I should've taken ya with me!", he huffed.
He shook his head in disapproval, "What kind of ass leaves his wife b'hind! I was mad at Leo, not you. Never you! I should've walked it off and talk it out with ya. I-"
"Raph"
His breath trembled with emotion. He had fucked up. What's worse, he'd been so mad he hadn't noticed until he'd woken up alone far away from home. The absence of his wife instilled in him a coldness that fed the one of losing his brother. Everything hurt. Everything like it was his fault (and Leo's). Everything was shit! And so he behaved like that stupid 15 year old his brother had met that faithful night in that alleyway. He ought to be ashamed of regressing to such an immature emotional state after so many decades. And he was! Maybe that's what made it so difficult to come back.
"I shouldn't have left."
The weight that washed over him for saying it aloud after so long was liberating. Yet the frown kept on marking his aged features. He couldn't forgive himself so easily, he didn't deserve it. Not after what he did to his family.
Luciana sighed heavily at his confession. It was relieving to hear that after so many years. She understood where he'd come from, of course she did, she knew her husband like the palm of her hand. Yet she'd sometimes wandered, when nights got too long, too quiet... When the morale was low and supplies were scarce, she wondered if maybe it was in her. If she hadn't done enough. If she had only been more attentive, scavenged more, trained more, if she had fought harder... Maybe then he wouldn't have left. He wouldn't have felt the need to leave.
Hands on either side of his wrinkling face, she squished his cheeks, forcefully pursing his lips.
Wide eyed and confused, Raphael blinked at her, "Mwuh (Lu)?!"
"You owe me big time, mister."
Raph could feel the skin under her touch tingle and the green under his mask flush at the look in those pretty eyes of hers.
"I-"
"You'll to make it up to me when this shit's over. Understood?"
Eye zeroed in on her smirk and the defiant look sparkling in the dark, the old turtke nodded, still half-dazzled at what was happening.
With a grin, she squeezed his face deeper, pecked his lips, then let go.
Luciana stood up, hands on her knees then quick to dust them off. Her guard was up already, looking around to make sure they were still alone. Even then, she felt lighter.
Raphael made quick work of getting off his shell - knee cracking lightly at the effort - and joining her.
In a split second he had a hold of her. Arm snaking around her back, and hand holding the back of her head.
His lips captured the gasp attempting to leave her with the scorch of a searing kiss that had been slowly burning for years and could now implode into a Supernova.
Dry and chapped lips grew soft with the familiarity of each other's touch. Like a kata well-learned, the rhythm was there. Like each Sai, the pair were meant to be together and so they fit the other as if molded together. They were a match set, finally reunited after being lost for so long.
