#01.05.13

Making things Work is Work… Who knew that I might be over thinking things…

Down stairs I hear the guys playing their games. My boyfriend is playing on his computer and one of our friends is playing Halo 4 over the internet with other people.

I sat down there and played for a bit, and I haven’t been complaining the past couple days, almost a week with them over almost every single day. But this entire, not being able to have the living room clean for a couple days thing is getting really old. On top of that I hate the fact that I cannot just roam around in the house without a care in the world. People are always found coming in and out of our house so forget walking around the house with the girls free and hanging.

I am a solitary creature. I enjoy my alone time and am very uncomfortable around large amounts of friends for long periods of time. (Strange? Yes… But am I going to change to the one who can’t be without someone always in the house? No, absolutely not.)

I do like hanging out and playing games with others, and I am honestly trying to be a bit more social. Even though it is harder than it seems. I have to think that being with someone in a relationship means we have to look at this differently.

I know he loves having is friends over. But sometimes I am wondering if he loves me as much as he cares about his friends… (I know, girlish over thinking things type of drama)

What I am learning here is to trust that things will happen the way they are meant to and just because he wants to be with his friends, he always wants me to be with him with or without his friends. And you know what that will be enough for me. Just got to get used to it, you know.

Acceptance, learning that it is not all about me, myself, and I. Some girls still haven’t mastered this in a relationship, barely even scratched the surface it seems. But I want to learn more. I want to make this work. I want to make him happy. I want to be happy with him.

I guess it is time to get out of my box and learn to compromise.

  Thanks for reading! I will see you in the next entry!