#...yeah okay

SpiderNoir/Lapis Lazuli

• When or if I started shipping it: Right after you had a post saying something about considering Lapis/Spider-Man.• My thoughts: They’ve both been through enough, let them be happy please• What makes me happy about them: The thought of them possibly bonding over having rough lives and getting along well with the one kid they both knew before (Lapis with Peni and Noir with Steven and probably Connie too)• What makes me sad about them: It’d never be canon, but I can live with that.• Things done in art/fic that annoys me: >implying fic/art of these two exists• Things I look for in art/fic: That it exists, I guess• Who I’d be comfortable them ending up with, if not each other: Lapis with either Blendin or Blue Pearl (or me), Noir… well, just look at the rest of this post.• My happily ever after for them: That they are happy, honestly.• Their favorite non-sexual activity: Probably just chilling. They’ve had it rough enough, they both deserve a good rest.

SpiderNoir/Stanford Pines

• When or if I started shipping it: I dunno, roughly around the same time I started shipping Noirzuli I think• My thoughts: At first I thought of it because of a joke regarding Ford’s VA also being J. Jonah Jameson in a different Spider-Man movie series, and I guess it kinda grew into a bit more than that from there• What makes me happy about them: The idea of them getting put into weird situations and helping each other out of them is fun to think about• What makes me sad about them: There’s no way in hell this would ever be canon, but I can live with that.• Things done in art/fic that annoys me: lol implying art/fic of this exists• Things I look for in art/fic: …That it exists to begin with.• Who I’d be comfortable them ending up with, if not each other: Ford with Fiddleford, and Noir with- Well, you’re looking at the rest of them.• My happily ever after for them: That they’re happy at all.• Their favorite non-sexual activity: …For some reason my mind immediately went to “puzzle solving”, so I guess I’ll go with that.

SpiderNoir/Invisible Spider (my Spider-sona/self insert I guess)

• When or if I started shipping it: Immediately.• My thoughts: Well this is kinda a loaded question, I mean one of them’s a fictionalized version of me.• What makes me happy about them: I haven’t fully figured out a story yet, but trying to come up with interactions for them has been fun for me.• What makes me sad about them: I was gonna say “Noir’s kinda dead in the comics” or “it’ll never be canon” but he’s not dead in the movie, and… I dunno, there’s worse things than never being canon.• Things done in art/fic that annoys me: I haven’t even written/drawn her yet• Things I look for in art/fic: …It’d be pretty weird if she was already drawn or in a fanfic considering this is the first time I’ve really mentioned her in slightly more detail to someone other than Cait• Who I’d be comfortable them ending up with, if not each other: Noir’s answers are already obvious, and for me… Blendin and Lapis. Still. :P• My happily ever after for them: Noir is not dead and we have a life full of fun adventures with our sorta-adopted daughter Peni• Their favorite non-sexual activity: Movie nights with egg cremes.

aaand the one I’m probably going to burn in hell for the most…

SpiderNoir/Deadpool

• When or if I started shipping it: Shortly after I remembered that Spideypool exists and realized the appeal of Hamnoir for so many seems sorta like what makes that ship appealing, and then went “wait what about this though”• My thoughts: …I like it more than Hamnoir, not gonna lie. Probably more than Spideypool too, if I’m being completely honest.• What makes me happy about them: Trying to imagine the dynamic they’d have is actually really fun?• What makes me sad about them: Noir is dead in the comics, it’d never be canon, they’ve probably never even met, them meeting at all will probably never be canon, etc. Like that’ll stop me though.• Things done in art/fic that annoys me: Dude, I’d be amazed if art/fic of this even exists considering that I don’t know anyone else who ships it.• Things I look for in art/fic: I’d need proof that it exists to begin with tho• Who I’d be comfortable them ending up with, if not each other: Not sure about Deadpool, but Noir… you get the idea.• My happily ever after for them: That they are happy.• Their favorite non-sexual activity: Getting into wacky hijinks that may or may not also end up involving their daughters.

Thank you so much for asking! Sorry this is so long, I wasn’t sure which one to pick.

…Please don’t kill me for that last one…